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AngelicaGoddess -> RE: why ballbusting? (7/14/2009 7:40:03 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: hsspode
I find it funny that so many lifestyle dommes will not kick a guy, but Pro-Dommes think it is the best thing going since sliced bread. I have been into the activity for many years and have been all over the net and am a member at many ballbusting websites. While there are definitely safety issues, you would be suprised at just how little men get seriously hurt in play with Domination. To be honest, I have heard of only one in the last 9 years and it was a rumor at that. IF the Domina knows what she is doing, it can be done safely and very effective.
Pro-Dommes do not think it is the best thing since sliced bread, sorry to enlighten you, most of us actually think a guy requesting it is not quite right in the head due to the accidents we see, and we know not to use the toes.
What most of us (the responsible ones anyway) will do, is tell you what can happen and make you sign a waiver, specifying that you were informed of the dangers and still wish to do it. It gets requested A LOT and in case you decide to not do it, the guys will run to the next online forum and complain what a bad Domme you are. Once you signed the waiver, you can't come back and try and sue us for the money your treatment costs, because you have a rupture or all of a sudden you decide that you want kids and your friendly doctor tells you, you are only firing blanks!
I let you into a secret, most Pro-Dommes enjoy tying up guys, beating them and all that, but we much prefer something that will have a less possible damage to clients.
As for the guys not getting seriously hurt when playing with Pro-Dommes, most Pros actually learn their craft, ambulances outside the dungeon tend to be bad for business. When it comes to ball kicking, it's what happens the next day or a few hours later, when you are not in the dungeon anymore. You might want to check with urologists and how many "sports injuries" they treat, because hardly a guy will say "Doctor, I like to be kicked in the nuts and I think this one was too hard!" Also once you were all over forums saying how much you enjoy an activity, how will you look when you say "Lost a ball to that, don't like it anymore!"? Most of the guys don't want to risk that the others laugh about them.
Once I tell a guy that ball kicking is dangerous, is he aware that it might leave him sterile, impotent, he might have ruptures, etc., and he still persists it's something he wants to do, I did my part. I can't lock him up or force him to walk around wearing a cup to protect himself. I will ask him to sign a waiver and I will kick him. At the end of the day, he's paying for the service and I did my part by informing him and with every kick I think "You stupid idiot"! In case that makes me a bad person, fine.
Dommes can't be responsible for everything, you have to think for yourself and judge the risks, I think it is responsible to inform you about the risks, I might have lost a few clients who were "turned off" when I explained what can happen with activities they requested (why people want to pretend that BDSM is risk free is beyond me, worst case scenario explained, you're still going for it and it's none of my hard limits - alright, you're a grown up) but I am much happier with the clients I have, they're RACK players. Most of my regulars don't want to do ballbusting, but quite a few are hardcore players and some things we do might make you feel queasy. Both parties are aware of the risks and take precautions to minimize the danger, now I can't take precautions to not damage your balls.
In case you pig out on fatty, sugary food, it's also your responsibility and you can't ask the supermarket to be responsible for your eating habits or obesity.
Would I kick my personal slaves in the balls? Hell no, I wouldn't want to risk damaging my property, CBT can be much more painful with less risk.
One I noticed, newbies (as in new Dommes) are quite keen on ballkicking because they think it requires little effort and is an easy session, usually changes when somebody with more experience sits them down and shows them what can happen, pictures and all.
I don't really know where you are, but in most European countries where professional BDSM is legal, a medical doctor will come round and explain quite a few things. Also a lot of Pro Dommes are nurses, they also take the new ones under their wing and explain quite a bit.
Same thing goes for scat! Do I like doing it? In some odd way, yes, because I am fascinated how far people will go, and scat lovers seem to be turned on by the dangers and they will faithfully reply "Nothing ever happened to me".
Will I think about doing it my personals? You must be freaking kidding!
In a session, I won't even take my gloves off or be in contact with it after it left my body, afterwards I sterilize the room after hosing it down, and I will ONLY do it in a wet room. I know I'm absolutely disease free and a health nut, still, if you want to risk your health, fine, I want to protect my health. Now if you want to give me a hell lot of money for something I would flush down the toilet, fine by me, but don't expect me to admire your sensibility! Oh and serving as toilet paper? NO THANKS! I respect my health too much for that, apart from my own boundaries, a session does not mean I am renting out intimate body parts and risk diseases.
Maybe you want to ask yourself why life-style Dommes don't want to do certain activities, in most cases the answer will be, that they have a different relationship. I have a different relationship with my personal slaves than I have with clients, it doesn't mean that I don't enjoy most of my clients, it's just a different relationship and I am not responsible for everything they do, my responsibility is giving them a good session and minimizing the risks.
See the difference as the difference between a meal you cook at home, you make sure that it's well balanced, you don't use too many saturated fats, salt, calorie content, etc. In case you eat in a restaurant, it's taste that will matter most, they are not there to watch that you have a balanced diet, they are there to sell you a meal you ordered. The cook is not responsible for all your health concerns, you are!
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