quote:

ORIGINAL: HatesParisHilton

see?  Now this Heretic fellow, I know i can trust HIM.

Whereas this Kia woman from the Demoniac Depths?

she

terrifies

me....

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I've got too much of a stoner mentality to be paranoid.

I just expect people to be people. That is usually a lot of bad with the good, selfishness with generosity, weaknesses with strengths, etc etc etc....

I don't think of any of my thoughts as paranoid, just realistic.

I am reminded of a discussion Generic Dude and I had, a long time ago. He accused me of always looking for the worst in people, of being too quick to judge. I told him the biggest difference between he and I is that I already know the good exists, but I need to find out the worst so that I will be prepared for it, expect it, be realistic. He only looks for the good but is paranoid about the worst when it peeks out and gets all freaked out. I've already seen it, so was prepared to deal with it. Doesn't make me care less about them, think less of them, I already saw it. He cannot handle the betrayal, as he sees it.

He will befriend a person with a reputation for shady dealings, expecting that somehow they will treat him differently than they've treated others. Then will feel horribly betrayed when they don't. I may befriend the same person, but with caution, not giving them the opportunity to screw me over, knowing that they will always be the same person, regardless of company and circumstance. And never experience the let down, knowing I willingly took any risk.

Fictional example: Aquaintance Fred asks to borrow $50.00. GD would not have it to spare but would struggle saying no, so would give Fred the $50.00, with a promise of getting it back the following week when he was really going to need it. Then would be upset when Fred began avoiding him, and never paid him back.

Fred asks me to borrow $50.00. I don't have it to spare, so tell him sorry but no, I can't, and forget about it. The relationship may become less friendly but it wasn't that important if it hinged on $50.00 anyway. OR, I do have it to spare, give Fred the $50.00 and forget about it. Fred never pays me back, but then I never expected him to so I am not bothered by it. He may mention it a few times when we bump into each other, and I tell him not to worry about it.

I expect people to be themselves, whatever that is. I watch people, listen to them, read them. Do their actions match up with their words? Does their body language? I can tell more about a person, after watching them for an hour (usually much less but...)at a gathering, than a year's worth of pretty emails and chatting. Granted, I can always pick up a vibe through written word, but not always what that vibe means. Watching them will usually fill in the blanks pretty quickly.

If expecting people to behave like human beings is paranoid, then count me in. And I wouldn't change it for a minute.

quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

One can think themself into a box.