is this normal? (Full Version)

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spankme44 -> is this normal? (7/13/2009 5:37:58 PM)

i have met someone who is interested in spanking but doesn't wish to have sex with me but does want to touch me and wishes for me to preform oral on him? does this seem wierd or is it ok?



tazzygirl -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 5:39:25 PM)

its normal and ok if you say it is. if not, then move on. if you want more, i would suggest you keep looking. if what he is offering will fullfill you, then, go for it.



DesFIP -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 5:49:56 PM)

Is this what you are looking for? Will you be content with him getting sex and you being unfulfilled?

If this is exactly what you want, then go for it. If you want a fuller relationship, then don't.

And I'm betting he's married and feels as long as there's no penetration, it isn't really sex so he isn't really cheating.



bamabbwsub -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 5:56:31 PM)

I don't know about how "normal" it is, but it sure sounds SELFISH to me. And I second DesFIP's theory of his being married.



GYPZYQUEEN -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 6:16:09 PM)

OP:

be careful love..very very careful...

IF this is fine for you .????...then hay that is the parameters fo the realtionship
adn if you are happy getting spanked then giving a BJ...it all good...

BUT

....you negotiate..talk BEFORE entering into it.
wheather a play meeting or a potential LTR....

you try to match style to desires...it is a 2 way relationship.
As to normal.............what is normal?
I think it is a regular occurance

Without men bashing...( I am aware of women shit too)

I would say there are a lot of marrieds who think penetration is not cheating..
vaginal I mean..there are a lot of lazys...there are a lot of  sexually dysfunctional...
there are men who for whatever reason CHOOSE to modify and NARROW
an interaction..for HIDDEN AGENDA...

If they are up front fine..you can choose,,modify...be flexible..discuss limits..

OR find a more suitable partner..IT IS YOUR RIGHT

If there are not enough commonalities in the beginning to go forward you will end up unhappy

 GQ"



dreamerdreaming -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 6:19:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: spankme44

i have met someone who is interested in spanking but doesn't wish to have sex with me but does want to touch me and wishes for me to preform oral on him? does this seem wierd or is it ok?


Oral is sex. You could easily get a sexually transmitted disease. Especially from a selfish guy like that. HIV and herpes are incurable. Ew.



kiwisub12 -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 6:37:37 PM)

Apparently its normal for him - else he wouldn't want to do it this way.

Question is, is it normal for you?   ....or at least acceptable.



Lashra -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 6:52:03 PM)

There are a few reason he might want this, none of which are very good for denying you pleasure. But if that floats your boat then go for it. Otherwise tell him "no thanks" and move along.

~Lashra



lizi -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 7:09:03 PM)

Definitely could be married or maybe has an STD.
As the others said...if this is what you want and it will fulfill you then fine. If you want more, then there is certainly someone else out there who will give you more. It's not a one way street. What he wants should also match what you want or you should go looking for the person who does match you. Your profile says you would really like a woman in your life, perhaps a man who is upfront about not having intercourse with you isn't the best match?



LovingMistress45 -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 8:16:54 PM)

In spanking fetish it is relatively normal to engage in spanking play without sex.  However, since he has a specific expectation that you will give him oral you have to decide if this is ok with you.  I have engaged in spanking play and other forms of S&M play which did not involve sex.  I consider those encounters to be casual play and as such I have never required oral from the submissive. 

What you have to decide is what are you looking for from this person.  It could be he is married, many don't consider oral or hand jobs to be cheating.  If it is ok with you and you are not looking for a serious relationship then I would just flavored condoms made for oral sex.



Arpig -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 9:08:27 PM)

Is it "normal"....Hun, around here just about anything is "normal", or perhaps I should say that around here nothing is "normal". Either way the question you shoukld be asking isn't is it normal and ok, but do I want to do it?



Racquelle -> RE: is this normal? (7/13/2009 10:59:45 PM)

"Normal" is a setting on the clothes dryer.  But it sounds to me as if you don't much care for the idea.  That's all that really matters.



Zechriel -> RE: is this normal? (7/14/2009 4:40:39 AM)

Good morning!
Too vague darling, I am sorry. I feel like there are so many other factors involved that you could not be letting us know or are overlooking. I have been with Daddy for 15 months and we have never had sex. He cannot, he has ED from his diabetes. He made that clear up front and taking pills makes him sick. In fact he has only taken a pill once and that was for oral sex. I still give oral, I have no problem with that b/c it feels good to him and me. Flaccid is okay by me. But what makes all this work(and yes we are monogamous to each other)is communication. If I need to orgasm by some means then I tell him, if I need to just hold him in my hand, I ask.  Otherwise he does not want me touching him there. Everything has to be okay by you and yes there will be some days where you might really really miss it -I often wonder what it would be like to make love to him-but if you communicate, then you might be surprised where you get-or what you get! lol

So many other factors...how long have you known each other? play or serious?medical problems?marital status? Only you kow for sure. Good luck!
Love,
Zechriel [sm=couple.gif]



Leonidas -> RE: is this normal? (7/14/2009 8:42:30 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: spankme44

i have met someone who is interested in spanking but doesn't wish to have sex with me but does want to touch me and wishes for me to preform oral on him? does this seem wierd or is it ok?


His name wouldn't happen to be Bill would it?  White guy, white hair, talks with an Arkansas accent?  If so, yeah, that's completely normal behavior for him.



ranja -> RE: is this normal? (7/14/2009 9:20:51 AM)

besides that he might be married as pointed out it could indeed be like Zechriel mentions that he might not be able to maintain an erection and not want the stress of 'having to perform'

So it could be very 'normal' orrr something fishy might be going on



daintydimples -> RE: is this normal? (7/14/2009 9:25:01 AM)

Per your profile you are looking for a dominant woman.

Now I'm confused . . . .



alwayssummer -> RE: is this normal? (7/14/2009 10:38:18 AM)

Lots of us are here because normal either did not work or we  found  out there is a richer MORE.    There is a small chance that this guy is  not  a  self-centered, married yutz but a  great opportunity for you to experience deeper sensual satisfaction by ignoring intercourse for awhile.  My first Dom had exactly this agenda in the beginning, and he was probably the kindest, most experienced,honest and consummate sensualist I ever encountered.  His  intense  and sensual spanking - all over my body- produced  amazing full bodied orgasms.
I was more than happy to oblige with oral sex for him...which became another form of
orgasm for me too through his guidance.
You have to ask proof from him  that he is  single if you, as many others here, suspect    he is attached  Knowing  who you are dating is  normal  safety for any dating situation...vanilla or enriched.
But if he is forthcoming, skilled at erotic spanking and transports you to places you have never been before, then I say you  beginners lucked out.



RumpusParable -> RE: is this normal? (7/14/2009 12:39:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: spankme44

i have met someone who is interested in spanking but doesn't wish to have sex with me but does want to touch me and wishes for me to preform oral on him? does this seem wierd or is it ok?


If it sounds like a good time to you with them, then it's fine. 


Are people old enough to be on this site really this incapable of thinking for themselves?



dreamerdreaming -> RE: is this normal? (7/14/2009 1:33:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RumpusParable

quote:

ORIGINAL: spankme44

i have met someone who is interested in spanking but doesn't wish to have sex with me but does want to touch me and wishes for me to preform oral on him? does this seem wierd or is it ok?


If it sounds like a good time to you with them, then it's fine. 


Are people old enough to be on this site really this incapable of thinking for themselves?


Yeah, what's up with that? According to the OP's profile, she's looking for a woman. And she's listed her age as 44. WTF? Has she been living under a rock all this time? [8|]

It boggles the mind.




windchymes -> RE: is this normal? (7/14/2009 2:14:44 PM)

A guy who wants no strings blow jobs.  Yeah.....it's normal. [8|]



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