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RE: a simple question - 7/18/2009 3:59:12 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

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There is no one way fits all. It's different for every single couple out there.

quote:

ORIGINAL: darkangel6989

i want to know if any Dominant knows the answer to a simple question.... What direction does power flow in a true power exchange between a Master and slave?

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RE: a simple question - 7/18/2009 4:15:20 PM

CallaFirestormBW

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Joined: 6/29/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: darkangel6989

Okay so my first post sucked and was very disrespectfull but i'm trying again here E/everyone......

i want to know if any Dominant knows the answer to a simple question.... What direction does power flow in a true power exchange between a Master and slave?

"Power", energy and will flows through human beings and between them and everything else that exists at will, according to the activity of the moment, and with utter disregard for any labels placed by the individuals in question. It flows through our veins, charges our brains, and provides a steady impulse to stimulate our hearts.

AUTHORITY, on the other hand, in my household, flows from the chosen "seat" in the dynamic out into those who yield to that authority. I take no power or free will from my servants... but they -do- agree to bend to my authority. They take nothing from me... not my power nor my will... but I -do- hold the authority over them by mutual agreement. At any time, any individual can choose to do anything they want with their power and their will, and they can choose to abide by the resident authority or not, whether they call themselves submissive or dominant, with the understanding that some of those choices may be incompatible with how they've chosen to participate in any or all relationships that they're involved in -- that's just a reality of life. Unless you've stripped someone physically of the capacity to exist, that person -never- can lose or give away the power that makes hir what xhe is -- the only thing xhe can yield up is the right to exercise authority over hir.

If someone in my authority did not like how I wielded that authority, xhe would be welcome to ask why--but in the end, if xhe really felt xhe couldn't obey me, xhe would be welcome to not let the door hit hir in the ass on the way out. There is a good reason for that, in that, when someone comes into a relationship with me and declares hirself a servant in my house, I make it -very- clear how the authority in the household flows -- if xhe accepts (using hir own power and free will), xhe stays. If not, xhe goes, but I still hold the authority in my own house.

Dame Calla

< Message edited by CallaFirestormBW -- 7/18/2009 4:16:02 PM >

_____________________________

***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

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RE: a simple question - 7/18/2009 4:51:10 PM

ishyB

Posts: 555
Joined: 9/2/2008
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Greetings,

In a power exchange relationship, the power is exchanged... the name of the relationship was chosen to express that very thing.

quote:

ORIGINAL: darkangel6989

i believe that the slave GRANTS the power to the Master and with it the free will of the slave…. but in accepting that power, the Master also accepts complete responsibility for the well being of the slave if he/she does not, he/she is not worthy to receive the power. When the slave grants her power (free will) to the Master, she/he also accepts total obedience to the Master. Whenever a Master fails to control or see to the well being of his/her slave, it is the right of the slave to withdraw that power and conversely whenever a slave fails to obey her/his Master. it is his/her right to punish/discipline or dismiss the slave.... that is what this girl was getting at E/everyone.... and i'm not saying there is a right or wrong way.... or even one set way... E/everyone is very different and i love that about people... it's an AMAZING ride through life.

Not sure what you are talking about here, but it's not a power exchange (since the 'slave' hold all the power), it's not mastery based slavery either. It's probably most akin to a D/s relationship where both parties prefer the to use the term 'Master' and 'slave' instead of 'Dominant' and 'Sub(missive)'.

Slaves -in my oppinion at least- don't have, hold, or keep control over anything.
They do not 'grant' the Master anything nor do they promisse their obedience.
A promise can be broken, this implies that a slave has the choice wether they submit or not.

While I do agree that slaves have a choice initially in what person they start to spend time with, I do not think they ever make a promise to obey that they are able to revoke.
Instead, their owner by his will is able to compel a need to obey him from the slave.

And because she needs to obey him, he is able to take away her self-determination and make her completely subservient to him.

And that's what a slave is: a person completely subservient to another. No ifs and buts about how, when and why she remains in control.
So if a person is still in control and able to grant her 'Master' anything... well I wouldn't call that person a slave...
When looing at the definition of what the word 'slave' means, the whole concept of a slave being the one in control seems a bit ackward, don't you think.

I really don't understand why people need to take words that have one meaning, and then turn them around to make them into an entirely diferent concept.

I wish you well,

ishy

_____________________________

I want you to know that it doesn't matter where we take this road
Someone's gotta go
and I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I wanted to move on
So I'm already gone

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PoJFn_RIdkg

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RE: a simple question - 7/18/2009 6:05:24 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

both.

(Nicely put).

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RE: a simple question - 7/19/2009 11:32:42 AM

vixenmoon

Posts: 35
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SoulPiercer

It flows in a circle, until the circuit is broken.

This is probably the best that I've heard it phrased. I've been in lopsided power situations, and they can't sustain themselves (at least in my own experience). Besides... "exchange" means exchange...

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RE: a simple question - 7/19/2009 3:27:04 PM

amaidiamond

Posts: 1793
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From: Watford / London
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quote:

ORIGINAL: darkangel6989

quote:

Well at least this time you have learned to cover your ass, but your question sounds as if you wonder if dominant's really know the answer. Like you have something to enlighten us all with, like before, just said a bit more tactfully. You are preaching to the choir here.

Look, you have a long distance relationship with someone you have never met and you are young, you have a lot to learn. So when asking a question, it ought to be a question you want or need answers to, not a platform to make a personal statement... even tactfully done.

M’am i do not have a relationship at all, please look at my profile for that information if you want that’s all… not disrespect at all….. and i was just putting something up to see what people would say that is all. Yes i am young you are very much so correct and i do have allot to learn but that does not mean that i do not have something to bring to the table… That was a very bad side to me on the 1st post i did, it was my bratty side and i hate that side of me soooo much so i sincerely apologize to You and E/everyone.

I believe it flows both ways, each takes from the other and each needs the other, I cannot submit with no-one to submit to, and a Master or Mistress cannot dominate with no-one to control.

I am confused regarding the not having a Master thing.... it was brought up because on your previous thread a man stepped in claiming to be your owner?

Regards

dia

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RE: a simple question - 7/19/2009 3:33:32 PM

windchymes

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Clockwise. Unless you're in the southern hemisphere.

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RE: a simple question - 7/19/2009 5:23:29 PM

BitaTruble

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quote:

ORIGINAL: darkangel6989

Okay so my first post sucked and was very disrespectfull

Yes, it did and yes, it was.

quote:

but i'm trying again here E/everyone......

Good for you. I'm all about giving a second chance.

quote:

i want to know if any Dominant knows the answer to a simple question.... What direction does power flow in a true power exchange between a Master and slave?

Exactly the way the dominant dictates.

::repost::

Darkness - that stormy weather of the soul and the ability to harness it and unleash it with control. It's no wonder to me that some Masters who have that ability think they are Gods. To shape and dictate where the lightening strikes, when the rain falls, how fast the heart beats, such, to me, are elements of BDSM power. Without that bit of darkness, the sunshine blinds me. Without the shadows, there is no unknown and I need that because my own shadows love the dance, the touch of fear, the primal and visceral that lays within me and can't be pulled out by 'kind' or 'nice.' Kind and nice are eaten alive in the face of that power. Without the unknown, there is no journey to take, no territory to discover, no growth to be had. "Firm but gentle." How often I see those words and to my mind, they do not hold hands very well with power and control. They have their place and, indeed, gentle and tender thoughts are part of an intimate and loving relationship, but it's not the relationship I may have with another which feeds the beast. Relationships feed my humanity, but the darkness, the blood, the roar and rage of controlled power feeds those things which fall outside of my humanity. Those things I sought and which brought me to where I reside today, in BDSM. The deer makes no gift of her meat to the hunter. He takes it and eats it at his leisure. What is beautiful for me, is that there is no death when he eats my power because it remains in tact and whole within him. He digests it then utilizes it and snaps it out the end of his whip, the blade of his tongue.. he makes the rain fall in the form of my tears. He makes the Earth stand still or rotate with single words dropped from great height so that I quake with unknowing. Shall the world spin to the left or right today? Always, his choice. Such is why his direction and clarity are so important. Without being told right or left, I can spin out into the void, not knowing where the handholds may be. This is how it is for me.. how I wanted it, how I craved it.. how I live it .. without that.. without that darkness.. without the control of that wild.. I am lost. The ability to stay in my center is the last thing that I need. It's the edge, the very edge.. to the point where you fall or fly that brings me back again and again.. so I can dance knowing I may trip and fall .. yet still taking that chance.

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Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

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RE: a simple question - 7/19/2009 5:48:37 PM

MadameDegrader

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The Power Exchange flows through both sides, being the submissive has to give their submission and trust in the dominant, while once its given the dominant can take the one who submits down the path within the limits that have been set through communication and trust. Its a relationship based on trust, the dom can't have any control over the submissive, til the submissive chooses to submit. The reason I like degradation is the level of trust the slave/sub puts in when giving that control to the one it serves.

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