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Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 10:52:29 AM

MistressOfGa

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I really hope that slavejali doesnt mind me reposting this here, as it was in "Introductions" and I thought she made some really valid points. I would love to discuss this further.

Is a broken heart a common submissive condition?

quote:

Written By: slavejali:
Whenever we give ourselves to something, we are forming an invisible chord from ourselves to that person, almost like an extension of ourselves. If the object of our affection is no more, that chord is ripped and causes us tremendous pain, which we can feel mentally, emotionally and even physically. When somene says they have a broken heart, the hurt even creates a physical pain in the heart.

It's said that, "time heals all" but sometimes that healing just amounts to scar tissue forming, that scar tissue allows us to function yet the pain of it remains, not allowing us to live life as completely or as fulfillingly as we had previously.

Taking time to sit and breath into your heart allowing your mind to entertain only positive affirmations can help.

To answer your question though: Whenever someone surrenders (submits) there is always the chance of a broken heart, but heck, its a chance worth taking, who wants to live without love?

This is so true, and such a wonderful post. I have never heard a broken heart described like this. I think it should give one to think about when deciding to release a sub, or asking for release.

Thank you slavejali for your description. It is perfection, in my opinion.

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 11:21:18 AM

slavejali

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My pleasure MistressofGA.

I think love is the reason we exist, its definately the reason for mine. It makes me sad when I hear of people experiencing a broken heart.

If I'm hearing what your saying correctly...i agree...I think people should be more prepared when breaking up with someone, knowing that it is going to have a profound affect on them which could last for a very long time....and also for the person being broken up with..for them to realise the importance of love and not allow their hearts to close but to consciously provoke healing within themself.

Ogod I could ramble on and on about love, its just about my favourite subject *grin*

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 11:28:41 AM

MistressOfGa

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quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

My pleasure MistressofGA.

I think love is the reason we exist, its definately the reason for mine. It makes me sad when I hear of people experiencing a broken heart.

If I'm hearing what your saying correctly...i agree...I think people should be more prepared when breaking up with someone, knowing that it is going to have a profound affect on them which could last for a very long time....and also for the person being broken up with..for them to realise the importance of love and not allow their hearts to close but to consciously provoke healing within themself.

Ogod I could ramble on and on about love, its just about my favourite subject *grin*

The thing is, if we all thought about the consequences of our actions before we released a submissive, or before we asked for a release, would it stop anyone from asking or releasing? If we thought about their heart being broken? I dont think so, otherwise there would be no broken hearts with regards to relationships. If that makes sense lol I have started my diet today and one of the things I cut out is coffee...I feel like I have babbled all day because of it. <s>

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 11:50:13 AM

slavejali

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Good luck with the caffeine quitting..first 3 days are the worst *grin*.

I dont think it would stop people breaking up but if people thought about the consequences to the other person it may affect how its done...but even then...ugh..it still amounts to broken hearts.

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 12:16:37 PM

Littlepita

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quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

Good luck with the caffeine quitting..first 3 days are the worst *grin*.

I dont think it would stop people breaking up but if people thought about the consequences to the other person it may affect how its done...but even then...ugh..it still amounts to broken hearts.

I broke my ex-husbands heart. I fell out of love with him a long time ago and I truly believed he was as fed up with the marriage as I was. I went and found a new love that I believe will give me the fulfillment that I have craved for so long.

My ex hasn't dealt with losing me well at all and I being such a submissive have done things wrong to help him that have only resulted in him having false hope. I hate that I have hurt someone that I once loved so much. But, if I ask myself if I would still do it knowing the pain I caused and my answer would have to be yes. I needed out of a bad marriage that was keeping us both from growing and being happy. It does suck though and I don't know when I will get over the guilt of doing it to him. Prayer and time I think and the love and support of my Sir. I just hope my ex can find a new love and that his heart will mend.

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 12:25:36 PM

yourMissTress

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OMG, I love your new pic!!!!

-Tress

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"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 12:40:05 PM

MistressOfGa

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Littlepita

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

Good luck with the caffeine quitting..first 3 days are the worst *grin*.

I dont think it would stop people breaking up but if people thought about the consequences to the other person it may affect how its done...but even then...ugh..it still amounts to broken hearts.

I broke my ex-husbands heart. I fell out of love with him a long time ago and I truly believed he was as fed up with the marriage as I was. I went and found a new love that I believe will give me the fulfillment that I have craved for so long.

My ex hasn't dealt with losing me well at all and I being such a submissive have done things wrong to help him that have only resulted in him having false hope. I hate that I have hurt someone that I once loved so much. But, if I ask myself if I would still do it knowing the pain I caused and my answer would have to be yes. I needed out of a bad marriage that was keeping us both from growing and being happy. It does suck though and I don't know when I will get over the guilt of doing it to him. Prayer and time I think and the love and support of my Sir. I just hope my ex can find a new love and that his heart will mend.

Here's the thing Littlepita, if you only thought of your husbands feelings and you did nothing, you both would be stuck in a marriage that was obviously not working. So how do you handle the guilt? How do you get past it? You tell yourself you did the right thing. That maybe by staying you were denying you both the chance of another relationship that may last a lifetime. You focus on that, instead of how you hurt him. How much more would you have hurt him if you had stayed and clearly been unhappy? I think it took courage to leave. I think that it will take courage and strength to get past the guilt of hurting him. Good luck to you.
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Tress, thanks for the compliment!

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 1:58:06 PM

fergus

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*sigh*

I was going to post something profound relating to the nature of love, passion, compassion, heart break, and the whole ball of wax.

However, only these Leonard Cohen lyrics run through my mind

"... but all I ever learned of love is how to shoot at someone who outdrew you ..."

fergus

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 2:05:10 PM

MistressOfGa

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fergus

*sigh*

I was going to post something profound relating to the nature of love, passion, compassion, heart break, and the whole ball of wax.

However, only these Leonard Cohen lyrics run through my mind

"... but all I ever learned of love is how to shoot at someone who outdrew you ..."

fergus

Fergus, I LOVE his lyrics! I am a huge fan of his! My favorite is The Beast In Me, and of course his Sopranos theme. <s>

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 2:09:09 PM

MistressOfGa

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quote:

"... but all I ever learned of love is how to shoot at someone who outdrew you ..."

Oh boy, do I know how to draw first..

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 2:33:32 PM

MHOO314

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She sips slowly and sets the glass down...

16 years ago I was given a gift, the most awesome thing in the world---I held that "heart" in My hands everyday--every minute I thought how My actions or the actions of others would effect that heart, I thought before I spoke, anticipated pain, sorrow and joy--every minute I never stop thinking about that heart--

16 days ago, I held another's heart in My hands--everyday I think how awesome this gift is, every minute I think how My actions or the actions of others will effect that heart-- it is now My role to anticipate pain, sorrow, and joy--I will never stop thinking about this heart--I love this heart with all My heart--

I now hold two hearts in My hands... for Me life exists for love.

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Mistress Hathor

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RE: Broken Heart *Repost* - 2/20/2006 4:12:25 PM

Littlepita

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressOfGa

Here's the thing Littlepita, if you only thought of your husbands feelings and you did nothing, you both would be stuck in a marriage that was obviously not working. So how do you handle the guilt? How do you get past it? You tell yourself you did the right thing. That maybe by staying you were denying you both the chance of another relationship that may last a lifetime. You focus on that, instead of how you hurt him. How much more would you have hurt him if you had stayed and clearly been unhappy? I think it took courage to leave. I think that it will take courage and strength to get past the guilt of hurting him. Good luck to you.
_____

Thank you for your wisdom and kind words. I'm working on forgiving myself and accepting what I did was right. It's all just very raw right now and I have to remind myself of why I did what I did many times. Time I know is a great healer so I will try to be patient.

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