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Protocol? - 8/7/2009 9:21:54 AM   
Steponme73


Posts: 552
Joined: 11/9/2007
Status: offline 		This is a spin off thread of one started by Peonforer.  The major thing that the women that responded to was protocol in short terms. I have read the definition of protocol at Websters.  But that does not seem to apply here.  What is your definition of protocol?
Is there pomp and circumstance that goes with this?  Is there a ritual that goes with this.  I am curious because I never thought of protocol in this light.
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RE: Protocol? - 8/7/2009 10:19:18 AM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		I guess the easiest way to explain this, in terms of our household, is from the 'manners' and 'scientific' terminology. "Protocols" are specific methods of doing certain things or certain manners of behavior that are consistently used in certain situations, and -yes- we do have and use these. The thing is, almost -everyone- has/uses protocols, they just don't make a big, formal deal out of it. The Japanese "protocol" for entering a house includes removing one's shoes. Leaving for work, for me, includes a protocol of waking SR, turning the AC to the 'daytime' temperature, preparing my green-food smoothie for breakfast, and doing a walk-around on my motorbike before I leave.

In terms of D/s, our household has both standard, day-to-day protocols (like what to have ready when SR and I get home from work -- for her, tea and tv remotes... for me, a lightly iced beverage and a clean towel so I can shower after riding my motorbike home in 100+ degree heat; dealing with rude or pushy salespeople/clerks on behalf of the household, etc., ) and intense, 'formal' protocols (servant's role and responsibilities in preparing and serving a formal sit-down dinner party; things like eye-contact restrictions and/or speech restrictions; limitations on behavior for trainees and/or visiting servants, etc... ) Most of these are things that might not be formally structured in some households, but would be in ours, because of personal preference, more than anything else.

In general, I think that people either -love- or -hate- the formality of protocols. We love them, so, for us, not having them leaves a hole, and we find them helpful, especially because some of us tend to a chaotic nature, and protocols help those around us to maintain a semblance of order in the midst of our chaos.

Dame Calla


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RE: Protocol? - 8/7/2009 11:43:44 AM   
pyroaquatic


Posts: 1535
Joined: 12/4/2006
From: Pyroaquatica
Status: offline 		I tend to think of it as programming. Without I am wondering what I am doing. A little more than If/then statements...

but you get the drift... I hope.


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As your desire is, so is your will.
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RE: Protocol? - 8/7/2009 12:18:09 PM   
XYisInferior


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Joined: 2/17/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Steponme73

What is your definition of protocol?


An established system of rules that govern behavior.



quote:

ORIGINAL: Steponme73
Is there pomp and circumstance that goes with this?


That is entirely relative to the observer. Various rituals and forms of etiquette may seem like "pomp", but they are often in fact quite necessary to enrich / maintain mindset and discipline, as well as the simple pleasure of the one establishing the protocol.

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RE: Protocol? - 8/7/2009 1:26:33 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Protocol is another way of saying the standard way of how things are done.  The rules of the way a submissive is expected to behave or serve.  Having clip address Me by a specific term (these days, it's either M'Lady or Mistress) is a protocol.  So are things like him opening all doors for Me or serving Me first at dinner.  Certain groups of folks, such as those in the leather community, will often have many of the same protocols in place, with their own preferences thrown in.

One thing that people will ask a lot (I know you didn't here, but it usually comes up) is what's the difference between a protocol and a ritual.  I try to explain it like this.  If a protocol is a standard way of how things are done, a ritual is a personal interaction related to how things are done.  The first is a one person action while the second involves both (or at least it should).  For example, one of the protocol's that I have in My home is that My sub will kneel, having My diet pepsi ready in hand, and be waiting for Me when I come in.  The greeting ritual that follows is that he will greet Me by title, I respond by calling him My lil one, take the drink from him, and he will get up on his feet only after I kiss his forehead.

Those of us who tend to use a lot of protocols and rituals usually fit well with those who like a lot of structure or feel more comfortable in their submissive mind set when there are more rules in place.  This is one of the reasons that clip and I are well suited for each other in a D/s dynamic.


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RE: Protocol? - 8/7/2009 1:32:08 PM   
pyroaquatic


Posts: 1535
Joined: 12/4/2006
From: Pyroaquatica
Status: offline 		Wow. I suddenly feel envious of this Clip.



_____________________________

You are what your deep, driving desire is.
As your desire is, so is your will.
As your will is, so is your deed.
As your deed is, so is your destiny.
-Brihadaranyaka Upanishad IV.4.5

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RE: Protocol? - 8/7/2009 3:55:21 PM   
SaharahEve


Posts: 231
Joined: 6/25/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Steponme73

This is a spin off thread of one started by Peonforer.  The major thing that the women that responded to was protocol in short terms. I have read the definition of protocol at Websters.  But that does not seem to apply here.  What is your definition of protocol?
Is there pomp and circumstance that goes with this?  Is there a ritual that goes with this.  I am curious because I never thought of protocol in this light.


Hi Step,

A few weeks ago I posted a free video on my blog addressing rules and protocol here. Granted, everyone is different in the structure / rules / protocol they create and the style they have (I lean heavily toward FS), but I figured this may serve as a general example (the actual rules begin on clip three).



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RE: Protocol? - 8/7/2009 11:52:49 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		I like LP's distinction between protocols and rituals. I also tend to think of protocols as "norm behaviour", what you do in the absence of any orders to the contrary. For eg, I happen to prefer eye contact with a sub rather than eyes down restrictions, so the protocol would be "Look at Me". However, if I was to suddenly say "Eyes down!" then that command counters the protocol and the sub would be expected to look down immediately. Protocols are designed to take away a lot of the "i wonder whether i should do x or y" hassle!

A sub of Mine that was 24/7 would have specific protocols governing greetings, asking permission for certain things, lack of bathroom privacy, general clothing rules, specific training in how I like each household chore done and most importantly, how the Household hierarchy works (Master, Me then sub) and how to handle orders from both Master and Myself. Beyond that, he should be willing for Me to be flexible, so if he's kneeling to kiss My feet and I suddenly decide to haul him up into My arms for a passionate kiss ... I don't expect him to protest that I didn't let him finish his greeting!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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