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No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 1:55:48 PM

knees2you

Posts: 2336
Joined: 3/15/2004
Status: offline

No picture? Is this a Warning for Some?

Was just looking at a profile without a picture and
was wondering,
does this send a Warning sign up right away?

I know I like to see who I'm writting to.

Some Masters/Mistress/Switches like to wait before
sending You Their pic, but for me
I like to see who it is before hand.
Even if it is not their real pic,
I like for them to know that I have a pic and expect the same
up front.

quote:

"You have been chosen to speak, but do you speak what You have chosen?"

Sincerely, Ant

Post #: 1

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 1:59:19 PM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

No picture? Is this a Warning for Some?

Was just looking at a profile without a picture and
was wondering,
does this send a Warning sign up right away?

I know I like to see who I'm writting to.

Some Masters/Mistress/Switches like to wait before
sending You Their pic, but for me
I like to see who it is before hand.
Even if it is not their real pic,
I like for them to know that I have a pic and expect the same
up front.

Not for me it doesn't. I used to have my picture on my profile, but took it down because of the assinine comments I was getting. I figure if someone wants to know what I look like, they are more than welcome to ask. Since I don't post mine, how can I possibly come down on someone else who does not have one posted?

Everyone is different. If you want to look at profiles that ONLY have a picture listed, that's ok. That's your perrogative. But it does not necessarily mean that the ones without pictures are red flags.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 2

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:04:47 PM

PenelopePitstop

Posts: 254
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: UK
Status: offline

It's not really a warning sign to me: all across the internet people often don't put up profile pics simply because they are uncomfortable with thousands of faceless strangers seeing/judging THEIR face.

Well I suppose this is quite controversial, but what someone looks like is a large part of my initial attraction at least. It shouldn't matter, and everyone is gorgeous at least once in their life, but you either fancy someone or you don't. So I would rather see a picture sooner rather than later...WITH THIS CONSIDERATION. What I find attractive does not necessarily mean what is conventionally attractive. I don't have a 'type' (well, not visually, anyway). In fact I have had people rather cruelly suggest I have no taste in men when as far as I'm concerned I'm holding hands with Hercules. Hopefully that will save me from a roasting in this thread.

_____________________________

Wickedness is a myth created by good people to account for the curious attractiveness of others ~ Oscar Wilde

"You had me at Goodbye"

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 3

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:08:38 PM

pollux

Posts: 657
Joined: 7/26/2005
Status: offline

I tend not to reply to profiles that don't have pictures, and generally I'm suspicious of ones that don't. Appearance matters to me, but I wouldn't say lack of a picture by itself is a red flag. I remember reading in an advice column a suggestion that people on dating sites grant "picture amnesty" once in a while and respond to a profile that doesn't have a picture.

I've done that a few times with exceptionally well-written profiles that grabbed my eye, and I've never been disappointed with the results. I've also found that people often look better in real-life than in their pics, but I know that isn't true for everybody. I've read a lot of stories about people who met someone in real-life only to find the picture was out of date or deceptive in some other way.

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 4

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:20:06 PM

LthrdWolf

Posts: 92
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

:IrishMist

Not for me it doesn't. I used to have my picture on my profile, but took it down because of the assinine comments I was getting. I figure if someone wants to know what I look like, they are more than welcome to ask. Since I don't post mine, how can I possibly come down on someone else who does not have one posted?

Everyone is different. If you want to look at profiles that ONLY have a picture listed, that's ok. That's your perrogative. But it does not necessarily mean that the ones without pictures are red flags.

Hey Irish!

Well put,I was actually thinking of putting mine up finally,but think I will maybe hold off awhile longer.I am looking for Power Exchange -Not looks- & the person writing me should feel this way too.

LthrdWolf ...sure pretty/handsome/toned packaging is nice eye candy ...but it's the Deep *spiritual* aspect piggy backed on physical play,which starts with the heart & soul that really does it for me ...& so is what I ultimately seek in this lifestyle.

< Message edited by LthrdWolf -- 2/22/2006 2:27:51 PM >

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 5

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:22:42 PM

FTopinMichigan

Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline

Some of my profiles (I have a few listed on several sites) have a photo that clearly shows my face (although the one under this name does not). In one particular profile, I have a full face shot, and I ask for a photo on first contact.

A friend of mine and I recently got into a heated debate on this, in that she felt she should not "have" to send a photo, in order to make initial contact.

My feeling is that if I have my photo, available for them, that I would like the same in return. I am not demanding that they place their own identifying photo within their profile online for all too see, but I am asking them to e-mail it to me, in return.

In our debate, my friend said that she felt people should choose whom to send their photos to online. I wholeheartedly agreed, but if they contact me, it's their choice to do so too, and if they don't want to...they don't have e-mail me, or send their photo. It's all their choice.

I have several reasons for asking for a photo on first contact. First and foremost, they have my photo and I'd like one in return. I don't think it's asking to much to share their own.

I also realize that while you cannot determine if the photo they send is in fact them, I've been harassed online and in real life, as well as repeatedly contacted by idiots, and the photo is a way to weed out some online players, that pride themselves in redundant, obnoxious contact. (Like the "Dom," and later the "sub," that used the same photo, but did imply they were different people. Or the Dom that tried to Dom me in e-mail, that is now contacting me as a switch, with the same photo, and making it like it's the first time he's e-mailing.) [Photos, for me, are identifiers for the person, and not to judge them on their looks alone.]

I find the photo offers a hint of sincerity too. If they are unwilling to offer their photo, or feel they cannot trust me, to send that, then how will they trust me to meet me, let alone engage in physical contact within a scene?

Not having a photo in a profile is not a warning to me, other than someone that would like to remain a bit private. Not sending it, upon making contact with someone, is usually a sign of someone new to online, or someone that has something to hide. Many of the men that would not share a photo with me, in the past, were married.

If I have a photo, I request one in return. For a man to say, in this day and age, that he doesn't have a photo, or he doesn't know how to load one...is BS. And if it's not BS...then he's too stupid for me to enjoy.

K

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 6

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:24:12 PM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

LthrdWolf...I could have sworn that you had one up...DUH on me...shows how much I pay attention to the picture area of profiles

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to LthrdWolf)

Post #: 7

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:30:16 PM

LthrdWolf

Posts: 92
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

LthrdWolf...I could have sworn that you had one up...DUH on me...shows how much I pay attention to the picture area of profiles

...awww tiz ok Irish!

*chucklez*

LthrdWolf

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 8

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:32:55 PM

SirKenin

Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline

I do not even look at profiles without pics... Oooops... I do not look at profiles with them either...

Seriously, My setting is for ladies pictures only. Every now and again you see a really pretty lady and I look at whatever pictures they have and I will even sit through as much of their profile as I can handle. The shorter My attention span, the less I am going to read about them obviously.

I feel that they have something to hide. I know for a fact that this is not always true, that some profess to hide them for professional reasons and I suppose I respect that, but no face, no read. That includes boob shots. If your finest asset is your bra or your nipples, I am not interested in going any further.

_____________________________

Hi. I don't care. Thanks.

Wicca: Pretending to be an ancient religion since 1956

Catholic Church: Serving up guilt since 107 AD.

(in reply to IrishMist)

Post #: 9

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:37:37 PM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

It makes sense. Most people that I talk to ask for a picture right off the bat. And that does not bother me. I just took mine down because I got tired of the 'hey baby let's get together' comments.

/shrug

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to SirKenin)

Post #: 10

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:38:18 PM

NeedToUseYou

Posts: 2297
Joined: 12/24/2005
From: None of your business
Status: offline

I have a pic so everyone knows the ugly bastard they'd been getting involved with:) I also for the most part only treat profiles with pics as "real". I know some maybe real without photos, but anybody could put a pic up it doesn't have to be a face shot necessarily. But I believe everyone has a defined limit where looks are concerned. And I just don't see the point of putting off the inevitable physical factor.

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 11

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:48:25 PM

knees2you

Posts: 2336
Joined: 3/15/2004
Status: offline

I have a list a mile long from Profiles with pics
that I have saved.

Even if they are not what I seek, or me being
what they seek,
if the picture captures my eye then so it is.

quote:

Well I suppose this is quite controversial, but what someone looks like is a large part of my initial attraction at least. It shouldn't matter, and everyone is gorgeous at least once in their life, but you either fancy someone or you don't. So I would rather see a picture sooner rather than later...WITH THIS CONSIDERATION. What I find attractive does not necessarily mean what is conventionally attractive. I don't have a 'type' (well, not visually, anyway). In fact I have had people rather cruelly suggest I have no taste in men when as far as I'm concerned I'm holding hands with Hercules. Hopefully that will save me from a roasting in this thread. PenelopePitstop

I'm confused? You like somebody just the way
they are, without seeing them, but still want to see a picture
sooner rather then later?

Sincerely, Ant

(in reply to SirKenin)

Post #: 12

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:53:43 PM

PenelopePitstop

Posts: 254
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: UK
Status: offline

Not quite, I was trying to say that I'd be lying if I said physical attraction wasn't a part of it for me, but that what I find physically attractive isn't necessarily Brad Pitt/symmetrical face/no wrinkles etc.

But get the flamethrower if you like, I'm not that great at expressing myself sometimes.

_____________________________

Wickedness is a myth created by good people to account for the curious attractiveness of others ~ Oscar Wilde

"You had me at Goodbye"

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 13

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 2:59:11 PM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

It took me a while to get a picture on my profile. The delay was not having a web cam or digital camera. I still done (which is why i haven't got an updated picture oif me with very short hair). I am aware that some folks here just don't have the spare cash to buy either a digital camera or web cam and don't even have anyone close who has. I can understand those who don't want to place a picture on the public profile but will provide one in due course to some one they are talking to. Were I in serious communications with a potential kajira/kajirus, certainly I'd prefer to see a picture of them before meeting. Soooo no sirens, bells, red flags or other warning devices are set off for me.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 14

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 3:01:12 PM

slavejali

Posts: 2918
Status: offline

I didnt show Master a pic of me till months after we started chatting. I'm sure people have many reasons not to post pics, however I know when I look at profiles i do like to see what the person looks like, not because Im even looking, it just adds an extra dimension to communication.

(in reply to PenelopePitstop)

Post #: 15

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 3:23:04 PM

Sunshine119

Posts: 611
Joined: 8/8/2005
Status: offline

Maybe it's just a way for people like me, who are not looking, to join the message boards, list some things about themselves and give some information without having a gazillion people hitting on them. But, it seems to me that if you are a person who is still looking for that someone, a picture should at least be provided at the beginning of correspondence.

I wouldn't have put up a pic here if I was looking because of the work I do. As I work in Social Services, I would hate to get into a long, protracted law suit should I get fired for posting here. It's hard to pay the lawyers if you're not working....lol

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 16

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 3:38:35 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

Some of us are still in the closet regarding this lifestyle, especially if we are well known in our community, thus no pic.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 17

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 3:40:13 PM

PlayfulOne

Posts: 1047
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: knees2you

I know I like to see who I'm writting to.

I like to see who it is before hand.
Even if it is not their real pic,

quote:

"You have been chosen to speak, but do you speak what You have chosen?"

Sincerely, Ant

I'm sorry that statement makes no sense to me, wouldn't it be something even more to hide if they were using a fake pic? Would not the absence of a pic be bette than a false one?

Neither myself or my little one have pics on our profiles. We both are in charge of our work and I am not comfortable placing a pic on this type of site with the amount of time both of us spend dealing with the public. We are both happy to share but are not comfortable with one just floating here.

K

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 18

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 3:43:21 PM

HouseofBear

Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/9/2005
Status: offline

Many people do not post pictures out of fear that it could jeopardize their job if someone recognizes them. I personally know someone who lost a very good job because someone at their work recognized their pic on another meeting site. He no longer posts his picture on line. So, if you look at profiles with pics only, you may be cheating yourself out of talking with someone really worthwhile.

(in reply to proudsub)

Post #: 19

RE: No picture is this a Warning for Some? - 2/22/2006 3:53:21 PM

RavenMuse

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

It isn't a red flag for me, having a picture but no written profile is worse but again not a red flag. I am FAR more likely to mail someone who has both and the written profile is by far the bigger factor!

A bit like Penny, I have no type. My past relationships have been all diffrent heights, shapes and races but there does have to be a certain physical appeal....

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to HouseofBear)

Post #: 20

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