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RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 9:31:07 AM   
PeonForHer


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quote:

ORIGINAL: OttersSwim

Dunno P...looks to me like you got little aliens growing under your skin that are about to burst out.  Might want to have a flame thrower on hand if the little beasties get loose...just sayin'...



What?  It can't be magic mushroom season out there already!

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Profile   Post #: 741
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 9:47:37 AM   
Venatrix


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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

Most of the rest of you seem to be advocating a "why buy the milk when you can get the cow for free" attitude, and are getting bent out of shape because there are *some* "cows" who want paying.


Actually, it was LadyHibiscus who said that I 'didn't need to pay the entrance fee'.  The truth is, though, that I can't pay the entrance fee.  Not because I'm broke (I'm not, fortunately), but because I'm not able to reconcile business mentality with romantic mentality.  I cannot feel like I'm 'paying for love'.  That runs true for my feelings about friends, too.



Yes, PforH, we KNOW that.  Nobody is arguing that point.  I don't want a relationship that is based on money, either.  But to say that women who want to be financial dominants are fakes is ridiculous, which is what many of the men posting on this thread imply.  In fact, do a search for sub male profiles with the word "fake" in there, and in an overwhelming majority of cases, you will find that the "fake" is attached to some form of commentary deriding those women who wish to engage in financial domination.  It's not my thing, but it doesn't make it any less valid as a form of domination than the way I dominate.

Seriously, the posts on this thread have mirrored my life experience exactly:  that there are a lot of submissive male jerks out there and a handful of really stellar ones, but that trying to find that handful of stellar ones isn't worth the slog through all the jerks.  I'm just sick to death of the men who tell me that I need to be this way, that way, and the other way in order to be their dominant.  I actually don't need to be anything other than what I already am.  If that doesn't suit them, they are welcome to continue complaining about why they can't find a domina.

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 742
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 9:55:09 AM   
LadyNTrainer


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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
Actually, it was LadyHibiscus who said that I 'didn't need to pay the entrance fee'.  The truth is, though, that I can't pay the entrance fee.  Not because I'm broke (I'm not, fortunately), but because I'm not able to reconcile business mentality with romantic mentality.  I cannot feel like I'm 'paying for love'.  That runs true for my feelings about friends, too.


In any non-familial human relationship, both participants must "pay the entrance fee". You stand a pretty good chance of paying yours by taking care of yourself in the gym and producing a nice bod that is a valuable and desirable commodity.   But don't kid yourself about there not being an entrance fee.  There always is one, and it involves meeting your partner's needs and wants with something you have and are willing to share.


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Profile   Post #: 743
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 10:20:32 AM   
PeonForHer


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
Actually, it was LadyHibiscus who said that I 'didn't need to pay the entrance fee'.  The truth is, though, that I can't pay the entrance fee.  Not because I'm broke (I'm not, fortunately), but because I'm not able to reconcile business mentality with romantic mentality.  I cannot feel like I'm 'paying for love'.  That runs true for my feelings about friends, too.


In any non-familial human relationship, both participants must "pay the entrance fee". You stand a pretty good chance of paying yours by taking care of yourself in the gym and producing a nice bod that is a valuable and desirable commodity.   But don't kid yourself about there not being an entrance fee.  There always is one, and it involves meeting your partner's needs and wants with something you have and are willing to share.



In that case, I must have paid those entrance fees many times in the past.  If so, I'm not complaining!

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Profile   Post #: 744
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 10:37:46 AM   
PeonForHer


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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

Most of the rest of you seem to be advocating a "why buy the milk when you can get the cow for free" attitude, and are getting bent out of shape because there are *some* "cows" who want paying.


Actually, it was LadyHibiscus who said that I 'didn't need to pay the entrance fee'.  The truth is, though, that I can't pay the entrance fee.  Not because I'm broke (I'm not, fortunately), but because I'm not able to reconcile business mentality with romantic mentality.  I cannot feel like I'm 'paying for love'.  That runs true for my feelings about friends, too.




quote:


Yes, PforH, we KNOW that.  Nobody is arguing that point.  I don't want a relationship that is based on money, either. 


I'm sorry, I thought some people were arguing that point.  Or, rather, points that were quite close to it.  'Partially' based on money, perhaps. 


quote:

But to say that women who want to be financial dominants are fakes is ridiculous, which is what many of the men posting on this thread imply. 


Have they implied that?  Though I've certainly seen such comments in subs' profiles, I don't recall the posts here.  

quote:

I actually don't need to be anything other than what I already am.  If that doesn't suit them, they are welcome to continue complaining about why they can't find a domina.


Ditto that re being what I am.  I'm not complaining about not being able to find a domina either.

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Profile   Post #: 745
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 10:38:06 AM   
LaTigresse


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Starbuck09

Having said that Venatrix I will have to do so much later on as I off entertaining a young[ish] lady now. We're going to the botanical gardens followed by a hopefully fun couple of hours watching Bruno. I'll pay for both, including a large raspberry ice blast for her as usually she pinches mine halfway through a film, because I enjoy treating her though not because it is expected or demanded of me. If that attitude is interpreted as me being  fearful of women or full of hatred towards them then I will live with it no matter how upsetting or offensive such judgments are.


What you are not understanding Starbuck is that, in the above, you are still retaining the power. Why is it so horrible to imagine that a dominant woman, the person that is SUPPOSED to have the power in a relationship with a submissive, demand the above rather than hope for it?


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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Profile   Post #: 746
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 10:43:24 AM   
AAkasha


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

quote:

ORIGINAL: Starbuck09

Having said that Venatrix I will have to do so much later on as I off entertaining a young[ish] lady now. We're going to the botanical gardens followed by a hopefully fun couple of hours watching Bruno. I'll pay for both, including a large raspberry iceblast for her as usually she pinches mine halfway through a film, because I enjoy treating her though not because it is expected or demanded of me. If that attitude is interpreted as me being  feaful of women or full of hatred towards them then I will live with it no matter how upsetting or offensive such judgements are.


Starbuck, I hope you've had a lovely evening, regardless of who pays.  But you are *not* getting my point.  None of this is about money, as far as I'm concerned.  It's about this whole crap that there's only one way to dominate, and that's without asking for anything in return, which is just as offensive as being told there's only one way to submit, and it is because of the latter that I am not in agreement with the OP.


The cherry on top of all this protesting and anger from this sub (?) men who complain about women who want compensation is that it's the MEN who are driving the market for the huge influx of casual money-grabbers and unethical women (honestly guys, some of these "women" are men with a fake profile, you know).  If there were not men waving their dollars with one hand on their wallet and the other hand on their cock, the bottom feeders wouldn't be here picking up the cash. No market = the scammers go elsewhere.

That has nothing to do with the other "money/tribute/pro" femdoms who may legitimately or not legitimately request/require/demand compensation for fantasy/"a chance to talk to me,"/domination/relationship.   The subgroup of women that most of these men have the biggest problem are responding to a market driven by the needs and demands of men who want their kink, want it their way, and want it NOW.  If you subs have such a big problem with that, where are the 36 page threads about how you wish sub guys would stop trying to buy submission and fantasy from any and all females that come into their presence?

Akasha


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(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 747
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 10:43:51 AM   
Venatrix


Posts: 2238
Joined: 11/28/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer


quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

Yes, PforH, we KNOW that.  Nobody is arguing that point.  I don't want a relationship that is based on money, either. 


I'm sorry, I thought some people were arguing that point.  Or, rather, points that were quite close to it.  'Partially' based on money, perhaps. 



Oh, Peon, are you being deliberately obtuse?  I meant that no one was arguing that YOU don't want a relationship based on money.  You've said it ad nauseum.

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 748
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 10:56:16 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: Starbuck09

Having said that Venatrix I will have to do so much later on as I off entertaining a young[ish] lady now. We're going to the botanical gardens followed by a hopefully fun couple of hours watching Bruno. I'll pay for both, including a large raspberry ice blast for her as usually she pinches mine halfway through a film, because I enjoy treating her though not because it is expected or demanded of me. If that attitude is interpreted as me being  fearful of women or full of hatred towards them then I will live with it no matter how upsetting or offensive such judgments are.


What you are not understanding Starbuck is that, in the above, you are still retaining the power. Why is it so horrible to imagine that a dominant woman, the person that is SUPPOSED to have the power in a relationship with a submissive, demand the above rather than hope for it?



I'd be the same as Starbuck - and indeed have been.  On my last date with a dominant I paid for everything (though I actually didn't recall that till a while after).  I'm well aware of the argument that by 'retaining control of my wallet I'm retaining my power' and I've followed it with interest here.  But I don't find it relevant.  I think certain men - many men, like me - would feel that it would kill the romance of it all to go down that road.   We can't allow that sense of romance to be killed, not even for the sake of satisfying D/s desires.

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Profile   Post #: 749
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:00:55 AM   
PeonForHer


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Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Oh, Peon, are you being deliberately obtuse?  I meant that no one was arguing that YOU don't want a relationship based on money.  You've said it ad nauseum.

Oh sorry again, then,V.  Sometimes I'm not sure who you are accusing of what.

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RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:04:30 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Well, paint it with romance all you want, but it is still a retention of power by doing so.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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Profile   Post #: 751
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:18:32 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Well, paint it with romance all you want, but it is still a retention of power by doing so.

Agreed - it is a retention of power.  However, the phrase 'paint it with romance' makes me wonder if you - and perhaps many others - underestimate just how crucial that 'sense of romance' can be.  The argument about 'retention of power' doesn't contradict it and sweep it away.  It talks right past it, without touching it.  It's a huge shame that the word 'romance' has acquired its 'fluffy bear and chocolate box' overtones in recent decades. 

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Profile   Post #: 752
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:19:26 AM   
Venatrix


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Joined: 11/28/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Oh, Peon, are you being deliberately obtuse?  I meant that no one was arguing that YOU don't want a relationship based on money.  You've said it ad nauseum.

Oh sorry again, then,V.  Sometimes I'm not sure who you are accusing of what.


Look, let's make it easy:  I am always accusing you of everything.  In fact, everyone else (males, females, hermaphrodites, etc.) should also accuse you of everything.  Now that we've got that out of the way, we can move on.

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 753
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:22:30 AM   
SaharahEve


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Joined: 6/25/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: Starbuck09

Having said that Venatrix I will have to do so much later on as I off entertaining a young[ish] lady now. We're going to the botanical gardens followed by a hopefully fun couple of hours watching Bruno. I'll pay for both, including a large raspberry ice blast for her as usually she pinches mine halfway through a film, because I enjoy treating her though not because it is expected or demanded of me. If that attitude is interpreted as me being  fearful of women or full of hatred towards them then I will live with it no matter how upsetting or offensive such judgments are.


What you are not understanding Starbuck is that, in the above, you are still retaining the power. Why is it so horrible to imagine that a dominant woman, the person that is SUPPOSED to have the power in a relationship with a submissive, demand the above rather than hope for it?



The entire point of submission is to submit to the demands of the dominant. I think we can all agree and respect there are different levels of submission; however, the primary motivation for the submissive is to relinquish its power and serve the commands of the dominant. Two complementary personalities wherein one wishes to obey and the other wishes to command.



< Message edited by SaharahEve -- 8/28/2009 11:23:34 AM >

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(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 754
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:30:50 AM   
Venatrix


Posts: 2238
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SaharahEve

Two complementary personalities wherein one wishes to obey and the other wishes to command.



Oh, no, that won't do at all.  That's far too reasonable and makes too much sense.  You'll never get a 40-page thread out of thinking like that. 

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Profile   Post #: 755
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:32:23 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Now that we've got that out of the way, we can move on.

Are you accusing me of not being able to move on?

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Profile   Post #: 756
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:34:47 AM   
Venatrix


Posts: 2238
Joined: 11/28/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Now that we've got that out of the way, we can move on.

Are you accusing me of not being able to move on?


Yes.

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Profile   Post #: 757
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:44:46 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		If it were possible, these threads would not exist, let alone go on to 30+ pages and counting.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 758
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:48:32 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Oh gawd no, we couldn't have that.  Things between people can't be allowed to evolve naturally. 

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Profile   Post #: 759
RE: BOIZ, LEMME TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE....THAT TIRED OL... - 8/28/2009 11:50:06 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		I was a thinkin' it, but you're a sayin' it, Peon!!!!

LOL

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Profile   Post #: 760
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