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ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Imo there IS a shortage of dominant men.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DomImus

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ORIGINAL: LadyPact
When you're good in your chosen role, you are sought after, no matter how the numbers stack up.

Good point although I'd have left out the 'in your chosen role' qualifier. I didn't choose my role in all of this. If anything, it chose me. I also agree with you that it would create a healthy survival of the fittest environment that I'd certainly welcome. Perhaps it would separate those that chose this from those that are this.

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ORIGINAL: IronBear

Time for a slave raid on the local mall and then set up a slave auction on the spot. You will rake in the sheckles before you have to move locations and finally relocate to another country with no extradition laws. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz



Imagine if the tables were turned on us within this lifestyle and suddenly there were not enough male subs to go round, too many Mistresses, and a huge amount of female submissives but hardly any male Dominants. Imagine if every time a Dom or male sub went to his male box he was inundated with mail but us women hardly ever got mail.

Would women carry on this lifestyle. Would we sit and send letters in the hope that a male sub or Dom would read them and get back to us. Would we change do you think?

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ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally
Course you chose it, we all do or else we wouldn't be on BDSM sites. You can shrug off the 'role' if you want to. I certainly chose to be here, granted I feel happy and comfortable when I am in a power exchange relationship and less so when not but that doesn't mean I would be unable to function without that, I cope being single just fine. I choose to identify with the term submissive, I choose to seek power exchange relationships.

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ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Truthfully, I think what would happen would be that the numbers would equal out.  While there are a number of confident, driven females on both sides of the kneel, if the tables were turned, the surplus would very quickly fall to the wayside.  Gone quickly would be the types who are around just to make a quick buck or anyone who is struggling with self esteem.

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Imagine if every time a Dom or male sub went to his male box he was inundated with mail

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ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Imo there IS a shortage of dominant men.

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ORIGINAL: CaringandReal


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The thread question is an interesting one. I cannot speak for dominant women but I see the actual online situation for submissive women as being very close to what was described at the start of this thread as a "what if?" As I see it, the real maldom/femsub demographics online and elsewhere work very much like the social orders in animal groups. While there are an innumerable number of men beating their chests online and claiming dominance, only a very few of these men are seen as attractive by submissive women. The attractive doms, whether you call them alphas, call them guys with game, or call them something else somehow do things right: submissive women percieve them as dominant and hot or interesting and actively pursue them. The other men, the betas (or the guys with lame? ;) ), have little sucesss at attracting the interest of the sub women. Turnover among this group is very high, profiles are here one day, gone the next (although a lot of them come back with a new profile, hoping a different name or approach or something will attract the women.) If a guy with lame does attract a submissive, he usually don't keep her interested for long.

In my experience, the proportion of "guys with game" to "guys with lame" is very small. One in several hundred, I suspect. For the guys with game, websites like this are their oysters, their happy hunting grounds. They can pick and choose virtually whomever they want. Sure, they get the occasional snub from a spoiled princess type or a scared woman who turns down everybody or someone who just happens to delete their email without reading it, but the women paying attention almost always respond very positively to such men, at the same time as they are ignoring or feeling disdain (or even pity) toward the other types. And yes, like anmials who group, the few doms that are highly attractive to submissives often form harems. It's a natural outcome both of the demongraphics and also of the natures/personalities of many male dominants.

For some reason, I don't think my theory is going to be too popular. :) At any rate, take it with a grain of salt, it's just what I and a few friends have personally observed out there in the wild frontiers of Singlesland, and I put it forth just as something interesting to consider and not as True Fact Writ In Stone.

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ORIGINAL: allthatjaz
The same could be said online/those writing to forums who are in ongoing Dom/sub relationships. Its an open testimonial that its the real McCoy and the real McCoy is often more attractive than perhaps someone without validity.

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz



Imagine if the tables were turned on us within this lifestyle and suddenly there were not enough male subs to go round, too many Mistresses, and a huge amount of female submissives but hardly any male Dominants. Imagine if every time a Dom or male sub went to his male box he was inundated with mail but us women hardly ever got mail.

Would women carry on this lifestyle. Would we sit and send letters in the hope that a male sub or Dom would read them and get back to us. Would we change do you think?

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ORIGINAL: leadership527

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz
The same could be said online/those writing to forums who are in ongoing Dom/sub relationships. Its an open testimonial that its the real McCoy and the real McCoy is often more attractive than perhaps someone without validity.

So I partially agree with this. From my own experience, I note that with very, very few exceptions, the slaves that I would be interested in are already in a long-term relationship. My theory has always been that actual long-term success is definitely a sorting process and it shakes out the "lost in fantasy' folks. I don't think they are "more slavey". I think they are less-so and for that reason, I assess them as actual possible partners. When I read their posts, they sound like real women who just happen to submit as opposed to characters in a marketplace novel.

But for all of that, there is also a feedback loop present that definitely skews the picture. Take a look at the position I am in. I have already WON. I have the girl, the house, the car, yada yada. Not only that, but I've had it all for a long time. So it's not all the surprising that I exude confidence and stability. But if Carol were to die and I was single, I would be less confident, more shaken in general, more needy, more lots of things. How that would change the picture is anyone's guess. But I'm just a little leary of the "proven success" theory because I think there's some important feedback loops in the system. In the absence of Carol, I would not be the calm, capable, assertive, yada yada man that I am now to at least some extent.

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

Imagine if the tables were turned on us within this lifestyle and suddenly there were not enough male subs to go round, too many Mistresses, and a huge amount of female submissives but hardly any male Dominants. Imagine if every time a Dom or male sub went to his male box he was inundated with mail but us women hardly ever got mail.

Would women carry on this lifestyle. Would we sit and send letters in the hope that a male sub or Dom would read them and get back to us. Would we change do you think?

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz



Imagine if the tables were turned on us within this lifestyle and suddenly there were not enough male subs to go round, too many Mistresses, and a huge amount of female submissives but hardly any male Dominants. Imagine if every time a Dom or male sub went to his male box he was inundated with mail but us women hardly ever got mail.

Would women carry on this lifestyle. Would we sit and send letters in the hope that a male sub or Dom would read them and get back to us. Would we change do you think?