RE: Trust

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Trust

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Trust

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Trust - 8/14/2009 12:30:03 PM

lovingpet

Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline

Communication for 1000 Alex!

I would be unwilling to jump to any conclusions, but you need to talk about these things that get under your skin and chip away at the trust you are trying to build. It is a rather common experience to be a bit less than secure in a new relationship and especially in a new TYPE of relationship. A lot of times, things that seem so inflammatory are really very simple and can be cured with a good talk and some snuggles. If what he is saying doesn't add up or otherwise there seems to be a disconnect in what he is saying and his actions that can't be resolved, either it is an issue of not him not being trustworthy or not compatible in the way he runs a relationship for YOU. Good luck with this! I know it's not easy.

lovingpet

(in reply to SouthernSpankin)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: Trust - 8/14/2009 4:35:15 PM

aldompdx

Posts: 538
Joined: 10/24/2004
Status: offline

Trust is more often misplaced than it is breached. Only a fool surrenders based on blind faith in another. Do not merely hope. Through experience, gain confidence that you are making the right choice. Surrender is by consent -- free choice and self will. Apply your discrimination and intuition to make the choice which is right for you. Yes, it really is that simple. The difficult aspect of surrender is within -- to surrender all the inner baggage that gets in the way.

< Message edited by aldompdx -- 8/14/2009 4:36:10 PM >

(in reply to SouthernSpankin)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: Trust - 8/14/2009 8:20:57 PM

Acer49

Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DLslave

i am hoping i can get some input here. I trust my Master with the physical completely, I know he will stop when the pain is too intense, he will stop when the choking is too much and i need air... thats not the problem. it seems that in the last few weeks i have noticed several things that is making me lose trust in what he tells me. should i ignore this and continue on? i am new to the lifestyle and not sure where to go from here. if he tells me one thing but does another then what???? i just happened to look up at the moment when somones im was up on his computer saying "may i approach daddy" or something like that... now i know he likes when i call him daddy... and i know it wasnt his kid... he is telling me i am his only slave/sub yet that im is very contradictory.... (there are other situations too but this one is driving me crazy) i mean if he wants another sub/slave so be it.. it is his decision.. but why not just be straight about it.. why hide it, why tell me theres noone else?

it Depends, if he is being sneaky about it, culd mean he is looking for your placement. Or maybe he feels you will veto the idea. Either way it sounds like he has some serious trust issues, so you sit his butt down and talk it out. If you are not acting approporately why have you not been called on it?

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to DLslave)

Profile

Post #: 23

RE: Trust - 8/15/2009 9:45:05 AM

poeticfreak

Posts: 80
Joined: 6/1/2008
Status: offline

you either trust someone or you don't, if you don't then you have two choices, accept that you don't trust them and decide where to go from there, or keep telling yourself i must be wrong, i want to trust them i should trust them etc.. and keep moving forward and find that the relationship has failed either because you were right in not trusting the other person or because the lack of trust was unjustified.

_____________________________

I have believed the best of every man. And find that to believe is enough to make a bad man show him at his best, or even a good man swings his lantern higher.- yeats

(in reply to Acer49)

Profile

Post #: 24

RE: Trust - 8/16/2009 8:04:03 AM

Collarher4ever

Posts: 8
Joined: 3/19/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DLslave

i am hoping i can get some input here. I trust my Master with the physical completely, I know he will stop when the pain is too intense, he will stop when the choking is too much and i need air... thats not the problem. it seems that in the last few weeks i have noticed several things that is making me lose trust in what he tells me. should i ignore this and continue on? i am new to the lifestyle and not sure where to go from here. if he tells me one thing but does another then what???? i just happened to look up at the moment when somones im was up on his computer saying "may i approach daddy" or something like that... now i know he likes when i call him daddy... and i know it wasnt his kid... he is telling me i am his only slave/sub yet that im is very contradictory.... (there are other situations too but this one is driving me crazy) i mean if he wants another sub/slave so be it.. it is his decision.. but why not just be straight about it.. why hide it, why tell me theres noone else?

Whether you are in a relationship that allows others or not then approach your Master and ask. Wondering about it here will only feed the fire that kindles inside. you are concerned about where you stand in the relationship and you are already questioning the degrees of trust; sure you can slice it to physical trust or emotional trust, but trust is trust. The dynamic is his and yours, not just his and not just yours.

(in reply to DLslave)

Profile

Post #: 25