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Looking for Dom to mentor my man & me - 8/14/2009 5:35:35 AM

nutmegarama

Posts: 3
Joined: 8/14/2009
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My man and i are looking for a dominant man to help mentor us as a couple, and mentor him in his training of me, and perhaps participate in training me directly. Where should we look? How might this work?

We've been in a D/s relationship for 2 years which we are looking to broaden & intensify. I have been able to find a lot of support for sub women but he has not been able to find mentoring/support for him as a Dom.

Thank you.

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RE: Looking for Dom to mentor my man & me - 8/14/2009 5:42:22 AM

DarkSteven

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Joined: 5/2/2008
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You say you've been able to find support for you as a sub... what places have you found that provided that, but not D type mentoring?

I'd suggest getting active in the local community, if you haven't tried that. Demos, and meeting others will be a good place to start.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

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(in reply to nutmegarama)

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RE: Looking for Dom to mentor my man & me - 8/14/2009 8:05:19 AM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: nutmegarama
My man and i are looking for a dominant man to help mentor us as a couple, and mentor him in his training of me, and perhaps participate in training me directly.

You can start by elaborating here what, exactly, you two are trying to achieve. It sounds like you are having no issues in the bedroom but, for some unexplained reason, the lifestyle stuff isn't going as well as you'd like. There must be some vision in your heads... what is that vision? Now, what are the gaps between reality and what you envision?

What is it that you'd like? Why aren't you getting it?

I actually like this sort of thing when the match up is right... but anyone who actually wanted to engage in this with you two would need more information to know if it's a good fit or not.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to nutmegarama)

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RE: Looking for Dom to mentor my man & me - 8/14/2009 9:05:05 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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I agree with both of the above. Getting out to the community will give you the opportunity to get to know other D types in your area. If you're seeing a D/s structure that is strong in those areas where you want to build strength in yours, get to know those folks and start asking what worked for them. If it's topping skills that you're looking for, go to play parties and see who's style you like and ask if they'd be willing to teach.

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RE: Looking for Dom to mentor my man & me - 8/14/2009 9:02:39 PM

antipode

Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
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quote:

and perhaps participate in training me directly

You will find a lot of people who don't perhaps

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RE: Looking for Dom to mentor my man & me - 8/14/2009 9:11:00 PM

KneelforAnne

Posts: 1011
Joined: 6/14/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: nutmegarama

My man and i are looking for a dominant man to help mentor us as a couple, and mentor him in his training of me, and perhaps participate in training me directly. Where should we look? How might this work?

We've been in a D/s relationship for 2 years which we are looking to broaden & intensify. I have been able to find a lot of support for sub women but he has not been able to find mentoring/support for him as a Dom.

Thank you.

From meeting people here on the boards I was put in contact with a couple in our local community. They have a good reputation, and they enjoy mentoring others.

For me, it's essential that it's in person and that they have a good reputation.

I also see it as a plus that there is both a woman and a man and they reflect our roles. For instance, we're Male Dominant/ female submissive couple, and I'm not sure that I would be able to get the same understanding and communication, education from a Female Dominant/ male submissive mentor couple.

Maybe I could, though, who knows?

Just a thought...anyone can mentor you online, and you'd basically have to take their word that they know what they're doing.

I'm an *intensely* private person about things like this, but getting out into the community isn't nearly as hard as it seems and the rewards have been endless!

Good luck!!

_____________________________

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(in reply to nutmegarama)

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RE: Looking for Dom to mentor my man & me - 8/17/2009 3:47:12 AM

nutmegarama

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Joined: 8/14/2009
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Thank you all for your kind replies. I will ask my Dom to help me come up with an answer to the question of what we're really looking for and then we can present it jointly. No pun intended.

I want to make sure what I say reflects both of our desires.

We are also private people and the few sojourns we've had into public places (a swingers hotel which turned out to be seedy and the people completely unattractive to us and a few "dates" on AFF which went no farther than dinner) did not work for us at all. We'd like to start on the internet and then--if geographically possible--meet in person. Working with a Dom or a couple who is Made Dom/Female sub sounds perfect.

We are both intelligent and worldly and would not be able to be guided by someone who was not.
Thanks again and more soon!

(in reply to KneelforAnne)

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RE: Looking for Dom to mentor my man & me - 8/17/2009 4:10:48 AM

ranja

Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
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There are some Dom guys here on CM advertising themselves as trainers and willing to travel, you could contact one of them and exchange a few mails and see if you might arrange anything... or are you looking for a D/s couple to swing with? same thing, just read profiles and start mailing.
hot hot hot... i am not allowed such stuff... i might only do cyber and we watch porn together... my Husband is not for sharing me and of the opinion that He is educated enough and very capable of doing any training i might need totally Himself.. unfortunate but admirable

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