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Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 1:41:49 PM

hizgeorgiapeach

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For the past month, I've been quietly putting my emotional life back together after finding out that the guy I was seeing here locally was a slimebag and dumping him for it. I've even, for the most part, been able to keep myself from getting temporarily bitter about him lying, cheating, and using me - figuring (rightly) that I was simply better off to let it die and count my blessings that he was gone before he could manage to do even more damage than he'd already acomplished emotionally and financially from constantly asking to borrow money. So other than a few odd minutes here and there, I'd managed to move on and get over it and start enjoying life again.

So I'm sitting here this afternoon, relaxing for a few minutes between bouts of housework that needed to get done, and the alarm on my cell phone goes off that indicates a text message. No surprise, I have several local friends who text me on a regular basis just to see how things are going or to pass along something funny. At least, it was no surprise until I happened to read the text, and saw who it was from and what was said. It was from that recent ex, claiming suddenly that I'm somehow supposedly "stalking" him - never mind that I haven't called, haven't texted, haven't driven anywhere near his home or work, haven't run into him anywhere, haven't run into anyone who was a mutual friend, etc. He's claiming that I am "stalking" him (despite all evidence to the contrary) and that I have made claims to mutual aquaintances (whom he of course refuses to name) that I was his "wife" despite the fact that we Both took pains while we were together to let everyone know that we weren't married and likely wouldn't be married unless it was a Looooooong time in coming. (Although when he and I spoke that no one else was around, he stated several times that he wanted us to move in that direction, and not simply towards that but towards a poly relationship where I chose any other females involved.)

I made it plain to him a Month ago, when I dumped his slimey ass for lying to me and cheating on me, that I didn't have anything else to say to him nor did I want anything else to do with him. That he'd blown it, that was it, things were over, and I was moving on with my life lesson learned.

So where the Fuck does he get off texting me Now... a month later... with all this sort of bullshit, claiming that he intended for us to still be "friends" and that *I am somehow to blame for us no longer being on speaking terms or someone else telling him some bullshit story to feed his ego???? Days like this make me want to seriously rethink my desire to avoid falling into the Revenge trap.....

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RE: Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 1:46:22 PM

lusciouslips19

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(((Hugs))). Ignore, delete and move on. Hes trying to bait you.

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RE: Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 1:59:10 PM

hizgeorgiapeach

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Oh, he's already managed to piss me off to the point where I would likely get in the car and do something both stupid and rash if it weren't for the fact that I have to be here to deal with dad. The temptation to make certain that a few people know just WHY he's on my shit list (folks who are mutual aquaintances who are only aware at This juncture that he and I are no longer seeing each other) - which would definately put a hitch in his get-along as far as certain political abitions (within the medieval group we're both part of) are concerned - is Almost overwhelming. I keep reminding myself that Revenge isn't really something to dwell on.

(I also keep reminding myself that Revenge is a dish best served stone cold - like - so far down the road that they've forgotten why you have reason to do something utterly and completely dispicable to them.. )

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RE: Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 2:06:23 PM

lusciouslips19

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Honey,

ignoring, being happy and success are the best revenge!:-)

After all think how much affect you'll have if you act like you dont give a shit?

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RE: Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 2:13:55 PM

stella41b

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((((((((hugs))))))))

Some people just aren't worth revenge, and this guy sounds like one of them.

Why give him the satisfaction? Seems like he never gave you any..

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RE: Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 2:21:08 PM

hizgeorgiapeach

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I did a bit of quick checking just now, and figured out why he chose Today to suddenly get back in touch with me trying to piss me off.

A couple of weeks after I caught him cheating with his lil stripper ho, I suddenly got contacted by her, asking me what the Real status of my relationship with him had been, and who a certain other woman (his ex, who is/was living in another state, but whom I was in contact with) was and why she would suddenly be on his doorstep that he would dump her (the stripper) for the other gal (outta the blue on his doorstep supposedly asking for crash space.) The claim he had made to the stripper was that his ex wife (they were never actually married, he simply threw a temper tantrum if anyone refered to her as anything other than his "wife" before she left and "ex wife" after she left) had gotten suddenly kicked out by the guy she was living with, and showed up on his (ex's) doorstep unannounced with no where else to go. So he, out of the goodness of his heart (yeah right) had agreed to let her stay there temporarily while she got back on her feet - but that he couldn't continue to see stripper while she was there, because it would be "akward" to do so.

So me, having a friendly aquaintance relationship with his ex, dropped her an email asking if she was indeed back in state, and if she was was she staying with him because of no where else to go and because she had (as he was claiming) gotten kicked out by her roomie. Never got an answer, but then again she wasn't prone to checking that specific email account on any sort of real regular basis anyway, so I didn't think anything of it and forgot about having sent it. Come to find out, when I logged onto the site that particular email is through, she logged in there sometime earlier today. Which means she finally got (and read) that email from several weeks ago, asking her those specific questions. The profile attached to that email addy still says that she's in another state - so she hasn't updated it to say that she's somehow back in This state - and she's a lot like me, if she makes a major change like that, she updates things pronto to reflect such major changes. So since her profile is still showing her as outta state, and she didn't send me an email back saying 'yes, I'm back in your state' - I'm going under the impression that she's still where she was, and simply called him to say "hey, quit making claims to your various bimbos saying X." The timing is right, and since her feelings on coming back to this state (and more specifically to HIM) were unutterably negative.....

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RE: Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 2:22:48 PM

GoddessImaginos

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Honey,

ignoring, being happy and success are the best revenge!:-)

After all think how much affect you'll have if you act like you dont give a shit?

lushy is right, hon. People like this crave the validation of attention. MUCH better to ignore him, that will piss him off SOOO much worse..
Here's an addendum to that, though. Don't just ignore him, make the decision to be happy and show it. Ignore, dress nice and fix your hair and your makeup, go out, laugh and have a good time where he and/or some of those mutual acquaintances can see you do it - maybe even on the arm of a new guy. If no new guys are currently available, be sure to laugh, flirt, and have a good time in the company of as many unattached males as are present. Never mention his name in conversation to friends, ever; have it be like nothing ever happened, and never tell that anything he said or did bothered you or slowed you down for a second.
Trust Me on this, sweetie. It works.
Living well really IS the best revenge..

< Message edited by GoddessImaginos -- 8/15/2009 2:24:45 PM >

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RE: Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 2:32:16 PM

hizgeorgiapeach

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessImaginos
maybe even on the arm of a new guy. If no new guys are currently available, be sure to laugh, flirt, and have a good time in the company of as many unattached males as are present.

Oh, several of the ones that I turned down while he and I were seeing each other have already been back in contact and been told "I'm not with the fucktard any longer, so the rules of that now-ended relationship no longer apply." Which means I Have been going out - with several of them - some of whom he knows and knows quite well. Most of them are simply relieved that I'm "back to being" myself rather than the withdrawn and decidedly unhappy (their words, not mine) person I was while he and I were together.

Having gone back just now to reread the email that I sent his ex a few weeks ago - that she just read today - I'm absolutely Positive that that's where his texting me today came from. Because part of his rant in text was almost a word for word quote of some of what I let Her (his ex outta state) know had been said By Him. The longer I have to quit being furious, the funnier it's becoming, simply knowing that if he was attempting to play the ex again (whom he's said to a Lot of people over the months that he wouldn't take back under any circumstances) - at least she knows the truth..... her bad if she's stupid enough to fall for his bullshit again.....

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RE: Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 2:35:29 PM

GoddessImaginos

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quote:

ORIGINAL: hizgeorgiapeach

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessImaginos
maybe even on the arm of a new guy. If no new guys are currently available, be sure to laugh, flirt, and have a good time in the company of as many unattached males as are present.

.. I Have been going out - with several of them - some of whom he knows and knows quite well. Most of them are simply relieved that I'm "back to being" myself rather than the withdrawn and decidedly unhappy (their words, not mine) person I was while he and I were together.

.. her bad if she's stupid enough to fall for his bullshit again.....

Indeed. Good For You!!

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RE: Grrrrrr....... just ...... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR - 8/15/2009 2:48:11 PM

peachgirl

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he's a little cuckoo...you are best off just ignoring him completely and not getting involved any more in his drama. (so, basically what everyone else has said

)

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