Being Ignored (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message

Norige -> Being Ignored (8/15/2009 11:09:45 PM)

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish. I love the idea that she's getting absolutely nothing from it, is only allowing me to pump away at her for my own benefit, and that it's all a bit frustrating for her - and obviously how her boredom and lack of satisfaction is frustrating to me! Does anyone else enjoy this, from either side? It's a bit awkward talking about it or searching for info, stories etc as I don't know any shorthand for it e.g. "cuckolding" or "CP" are quick and easy.



SteelofUtah -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 12:48:23 AM)

But it isn't Cuckholding.

Most would associate what you are explaining with Humiliation in that you do not please her sexually and are really just a nuisance.

I think rather than finding a term for it stick with what it is a sexual dynamic you enjoy in which it is all about your pleasure and you do noting sexually for the other person. At least that is how I read it.

Steel



VanityFix -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 2:29:07 AM)

being turned on by being inadequate, ignored and being unsulted is very much humilation play, i donno if there is a very specific term other than that but this falls under the humilation umbrella. im a fan of humilation as well as many others. welcome to the forums



sirsholly -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 2:35:11 AM)

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage [&:]



WyldHrt -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 3:11:18 AM)

quote:

I think rather than finding a term for it stick with what it is a sexual dynamic you enjoy in which it is all about your pleasure and you do noting sexually for the other person. At least that is how I read it.


Bingo.
As the OP identifies as a sub, he may have difficulty with this. I know few Dommes who are into letting a sub get into their pants if he is so unskilled that they are doing their nails while he is "pumping away" and getting off. Then again, I'm a sub who is into pleasing my partner first and foremost, so I may very well be missing something here.



Cloudz -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 4:40:49 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage [&:]


perfect!!!



Prinsexx -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 5:01:34 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Norige

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish. I love the idea that she's getting absolutely nothing from it, is only allowing me to pump away at her for my own benefit, and that it's all a bit frustrating for her - and obviously how her boredom and lack of satisfaction is frustrating to me! Does anyone else enjoy this, from either side? It's a bit awkward talking about it or searching for info, stories etc as I don't know any shorthand for it e.g. "cuckolding" or "CP" are quick and easy.

Emotional maschism on your behalf?
Objectification for your partner?



stella41b -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 7:09:54 AM)

Iggy-jiggy?



cornflakegirl -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 7:20:54 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage [&:]


Hmmm. Maybe this is why my ex was so satisfied with our sex life, while I had an intimate knowledge of the patterns in the textured ceiling. ;)



petmonkey -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 8:21:02 AM)

Just for fun . . . making up a word for faux-Scrabble.

Spernophilia:
sperno (Latin): to scorn, despise, spurn + philia (Greek): to love.  A love of being scorned or scorning someone during sexual acts.
BDSM slang: "Cold-shouldering" or "CS".

You read it here first.

i agree with the other posters.  OP, it's a good humiliation scene to offer as an example when someone asks you about your fantasies.

edited to add quotation marks and acronym.



MasterG2kTR -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 9:30:05 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage [&:]


you understand things all too well Holly....[sm=LMAO.gif]



Daddysredhead -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 9:53:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage [&:]


Oh shit, holly!  [:D]



sirsholly -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 9:54:52 AM)

[:D][:D][:D][:D][:D]



Daddysredhead -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 9:57:39 AM)

<--------   ignoring holly

(does that turn you on?)   [;)]



LadyPact -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 10:15:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Is there a term for, or for the fetish for, being ignored during sex? Sometimes, I love my partner to act/be really bored and unimpressed, check her watch, read a magazine or a book, watch TV and completely ignore me and be impatient for me to finish.
marriage [&:]

First reaction:  Funny as hell.

Second thought:  Wondering if someone might be hoping to get their bottom warmed.  (In other words, does sirsholly's Sir ever read the boards?)

Last thought:  Back to funny.



LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 10:25:02 AM)

this is a new fetish that i have never heard of i know some people like h umilation but treated like yesterdays nadda no not going to happen ever



dreamerdreaming -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 1:44:22 PM)

Fast reply: humiliation/objectification .... [:)]

I'm not aware of any label for the particular aspect of it that you are describing in your OP. But I'm sure that if you explore further in your humilation and objectification desires, you'll find plenty of other things like this that ring your bell. 

Just explain to your potentails that you have a desire to be humialiated and objectified, and detail your particular scenario as an example.



KMsAngel -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 4:02:10 PM)

mr jim doesn't read the boards often enough, is what i think.
[8|]



TazDevil -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 4:06:25 PM)

I do not know if there is a name for it, maybe there sould be, maybe you can make one! more or less it just called Ignored play? (do evreything need a name lol?)



windchymes -> RE: Being Ignored (8/16/2009 4:19:13 PM)

I'm trying to remember what my ex-husband called it.....dammit, can't remember shit anymore.....



Page: [1] 2   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.046875