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I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/16/2009 7:48:45 PM   
Daes


Posts: 246
Joined: 4/20/2007
From: Diamond Bar, SoCal
Status: offline 		Now I'm going to clarify right now that I'm very happy in my relationship, and would Not leave my Sir whatsoever. That stated, over the past several months I've been finding myself missing having a dominant female partner.

Currently Sir and I have a monogamous relatioship and I'm not allowed to play with anyone, period. I'm pretty sure that He's at least somewhat aware that I've been missing having a woman. Lately we've been talking more about adding a girl into the dynamic but she'd have to be a switch and itd only be for play.

I guess what I really miss is the service I was providing for my domme. Things that can't really be worked into my current relationship. Though Sir has not been training me, and we have not played in.... forever.. So I can't tell if it's specifically the service I provided for my Lady, or if it's just serving in general and I'm all frustrated as hell.

Anyone else have some kind of similar situation? Missing something? Be it a man or a woman or some kind of service you provided for another partner?

_____________________________

~*Estrellita*~
I want to be in surrender of His strength, of His power. Alone, I am nothing, but in His arms I am all things...

~His puppy~
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/16/2009 8:01:04 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Can't say I can relate but have you talked to your Sir about being able to provide these services you gave your Domme?


(in reply to Daes)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/16/2009 8:12:27 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		Yes, there's what I would feel to be quite a few things I miss that I am not getting, but they're not important enough to terminate the relationship over since i am largely happy enough even with out them, which would be the only course of action if I was to get what I was missing.

However if there ever was another relationship, I wouldn't settle and these things would be a part of the whole package or no deal.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Daes


Anyone else have some kind of similar situation? Missing something? Be it a man or a woman or some kind of service you provided for another partner?

(in reply to Daes)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/17/2009 12:11:42 AM   
LillyoftheVally


Posts: 1826
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Daes

Currently Sir and I have a monogamous relatioship and I'm not allowed to play with anyone, period. I'm pretty sure that He's at least somewhat aware that I've been missing having a woman. Lately we've been talking more about adding a girl into the dynamic but she'd have to be a switch and itd only be for play.

I guess what I really miss is the service I was providing for my domme. Things that can't really be worked into my current relationship. Though Sir has not been training me, and we have not played in.... forever.. So I can't tell if it's specifically the service I provided for my Lady, or if it's just serving in general and I'm all frustrated as hell.



My response is two fold. First, if what you are missing specifically is the service that you provided to your Domme then would that not be adequately filled by a female switch involved for play? And as little wonder said have you explained to your Sir that this is a problem you are currently having?

The second part, I miss some things, I miss a bond that I used to have with a few partners, I miss the innocent curiosity I used to have. Generally though, I don't miss anything like you do, I am pretty happy with where I am and who I am and am grateful to those people who helped me get there.


_____________________________

'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

(in reply to Daes)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/17/2009 1:43:43 PM   
lameduck13


Posts: 64
Joined: 4/5/2008
Status: offline 		I miss my last Domme being in a vanilla relationship now I miss everything from my past D/s relationships. I miss the connection that came from serving my Domme, I miss the connection from laying next to Her every night knowing She would have a plethora of things for me to do for Her in the morning, many of which She enjoyed watching me do in my "uniform". I love my current girl whole heartidly but she has made it abundantly clear that there will be no D/s relationship between her and I.

So yes I do know what your missing so to speak.

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/17/2009 1:51:57 PM   
MagiksSlave


Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline 		I miss my sanity :(


MS

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


-Rodney Atkins-



(in reply to lameduck13)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/18/2009 8:07:09 AM   
BarnacleBill


Posts: 51
Joined: 6/12/2009
Status: offline 		Awwww Dont worry it comes back from time to time! Trust Me....LOL

(in reply to MagiksSlave)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/18/2009 2:05:04 PM   
Daes


Posts: 246
Joined: 4/20/2007
From: Diamond Bar, SoCal
Status: offline 		If we had a switch in the house it Could work but in that given scenario I'd prefer a partner that would be With us rather than just for kicks, if you know what I mean. I like pampering my Domina, and .... I don't submit to just any random person. I have to know her and be attracted to who she is as a woman. And that can take a very special person.

Sir and I have talked about it and still are - there's more than one issue involved here than just the presence of a dominant woman.

Sir has no interest in being dominated by a woman, and I would be livid if I had to be involved in a scene with someone being subservient to Him. It's just.. not my thing. If anything I'd beither angry/jealous or bored. So we have quite a few kinks to work out... literally.

I did see if he'd be interested in allowing me to play with women on occassion but He doesn't really like the idea. So currently we're at a brick wall and have somewhat left the topic alone.

_____________________________

~*Estrellita*~
I want to be in surrender of His strength, of His power. Alone, I am nothing, but in His arms I am all things...

~His puppy~

(in reply to LillyoftheVally)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/18/2009 11:10:52 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		It doesn't sound as though you are very happy in the relationship. You have no service, no training and no play. Have you told him how unsatisfied you are?

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Daes)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/19/2009 1:00:56 AM   
sexisubi


Posts: 373
Joined: 11/23/2008
Status: offline 		in my last relationship it was almost too nilla for me and i missed having a dom period when i was able to play with others i fell in love with another person, and that was the end of our relationship but i wasnt going to just jump into my other one.. if youre missing something you should really talk to him about it.. and if you arent playing maybe its cause hes upset that youre missing something and he isnt giving you everything you want or need.

i can say i would not find myself in another relationship where its like that unless i was ordered to do it, but my eyes should be focused on that person. cause i know the dangers of play.. expecially in D/s. there needs to be soo much trust!

but some people can do it! i dont know do what you feel comfortable with. and what he feels comfortable with.

_____________________________

bound by love,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIvvaqUdDm8

(in reply to Daes)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/19/2009 5:52:20 PM   
MagiksSlave


Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BarnacleBill

Awwww Dont worry it comes back from time to time! Trust Me....LOL


Yeah... but I keep losing it... its so dang hard to keep track of!!


MS

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


-Rodney Atkins-



(in reply to BarnacleBill)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/22/2009 9:55:01 PM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Daes

Now I'm going to clarify right now that I'm very happy in my relationship, and would Not leave my Sir whatsoever. That stated, over the past several months I've been finding myself missing having a dominant female partner.

Currently Sir and I have a monogamous relatioship and I'm not allowed to play with anyone, period. I'm pretty sure that He's at least somewhat aware that I've been missing having a woman. Lately we've been talking more about adding a girl into the dynamic but she'd have to be a switch and itd only be for play.

I guess what I really miss is the service I was providing for my domme. Things that can't really be worked into my current relationship. Though Sir has not been training me, and we have not played in.... forever.. So I can't tell if it's specifically the service I provided for my Lady, or if it's just serving in general and I'm all frustrated as hell.

Anyone else have some kind of similar situation? Missing something? Be it a man or a woman or some kind of service you provided for another partner?


It is my thought that you are distressed at not being used. I do not believe it has anything to do with desiring a Domme. I would recommend that you ask your Sir to remedy the situation.



_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to Daes)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: I Miss having a Domme.. - 8/22/2009 10:16:15 PM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Daes

Anyone else have some kind of similar situation? Missing something? Be it a man or a woman or some kind of service you provided for another partner?


i miss the push, the stretching, and the mental/emotional challenges of slavery. even the not so nice things that used to frustrate the heck out of me. i also miss my writing a great deal. for some reason i compose the most insightful pieces when i'm in service. perhaps it is the yoke that inspires it, or merely the one i'm with. i'm not certain but there are moments when i yearn for both.

porcelaine


_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to Daes)
Profile   Post #: 13
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