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RE: Question About Relationships - 9/2/2009 12:34:54 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I'm going with the forbidden fruit theory.


Definitely! Regardless of why the fruit is forbidden, just the fact that it is.

That and the fact that they are horny and read too many Penthouse stories.....


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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Question About Relationships - 9/2/2009 2:41:41 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		Forbidden fruit, yes, and that human nature thing about (almost) always wanting what you can't have. 

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RE: Question About Relationships - 9/2/2009 3:58:58 PM   
DomImus


Posts: 2004
Joined: 3/17/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: VanIsleKnight

I feel that because I'm a guy I should have -some- sort of idea as to why men go after women that they know is completely unavailable, yet they still do.  Why is this?  Why would a guy purposefully try to wreck a perfectly good relationship?


It happens because enough of those so called "completely unavailable" people are anything but that. If nobody ever strayed outside of their committed relationships (whatever they may be) then over time this activity would abate. If the the fish would never ever bite, fishermen would stop fishing. The reason fishing continues is that enough of them bite to make the effort payoff for those who fish.

Blame rarely seems to get placed on both sides where it truly belongs. To be entirely honest, if you made a vow or promise then you have an obligation to live up to it just as the other party has an obligation to respect it.




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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Question About Relationships - 9/14/2009 11:32:46 PM   
Rhodes85


Posts: 445
Joined: 11/15/2008
From: Nova Scotia, Canada
Status: offline 		'I actually had one slavegirl tell me that she left off her profile the fact that she was serving a Master because the got more men hitting on her if she stated that! '

You know Steven, that sounds exactly like my ex and some things on her facebook account.

Anyways getting to the point it really depends. People do things for different reasons. Maybe they like the 'forbidden fruit' or the thrill of the 'conquest' or just the fact that they can get her to screw over her husband. It really depends on the person. Personally I won't go near a married or otherwise involved woman. Granted I did once but I did not know she was married and she did say she was divorced. That being said as far as the womans reason for going along with it...attention, 'fun' or the thrill of cheating on her husband - among other reasons to numorous to list. Hell last week a friend of mine (who is in a 5 year relationship with her boyfriend I might add) was completely baffled when I said I wasn't interested in seeing her topless on cam...I believe she said 'well most guys don't care much about online stuff and it really doesn't mean anything anyway...its just a bit of fun' I mean wtf?! it doesn't mean much? thats not a friendly hug or kiss shes talking about...ugh...people make me wonder sometimes...

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RE: Question About Relationships - 9/15/2009 1:37:18 AM   
slaveboyforyou


Posts: 3607
Joined: 1/6/2005
From: Arkansas, U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

I feel that because I'm a guy I should have -someI feel that because I'm a guy I should have -some- sort of idea as to why men go after women that they know is completely unavailable, yet they still do. Why is this? Why would a guy purposefully try to wreck a perfectly good relationship? - sort of idea as to why men go after women that they know is completely unavailable, yet they still do.


There is no such thing as "unavaliable." Sorry, but there isn't. Men go after women they are attracted to....plain and simple. If we find a way through the wire, we will take it. All's fair in love and war as the cliche goes. You're naive if you think men have some sort of brotherhood. We don't. It's every man for himself. If I meet a woman I like, I am going after her. I'm not a psycho about it, but I will definitely seize the day. Her other lovers aren't a concern of mine. Sorry, I don't consider that underhanded; it's competition.

quote:

When I was young and stupid I did things like that because I thought I was (or actually was) in love, or I had been going through a supremely difficult time emotionally and was open to any sort of healing at all.


You're 22, were your young and stupid days last year?

< Message edited by slaveboyforyou -- 9/15/2009 1:38:10 AM >

(in reply to VanIsleKnight)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Question About Relationships - 9/15/2009 1:52:48 AM   
VanIsleKnight


Posts: 283
Joined: 8/4/2009
Status: offline 		Cute.  More like 6.  Also, I'm 23 now.  ;)

Also?  Good luck with that.  There are a few women that I'll do my best to stay away from.

Women that are dating my closer friends.
Women that are dating my relatives.
Women that are dating my roommates.
Women that are married.

It doesn't do anything but cause drama, and the types of guys that would go after any of them and not have any respect at all for these people listed?  They're selfish sleazeballs.  It often irreparably damages friendships and long lasting relationships, more often then not for the sake of a fuck or a fling.

< Message edited by VanIsleKnight -- 9/15/2009 2:02:08 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Question About Relationships - 9/15/2009 2:12:45 AM   
slaveboyforyou


Posts: 3607
Joined: 1/6/2005
From: Arkansas, U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

Cute. More like 6. Also, I'm 23 now. ;) Nice generational gap there though.


23? Yep, you've crossed the threshold into all that manhood has to offer. So you left your young and stupid days when you were still a teenager. Man, things have changed since I was your age. I enjoyed my youth. I acted like an inmature until I actually was forced to be mature. Enjoy your youth, you have plenty of time to be responsible later.

quote:

Also? Good luck with that. There are a few women that I'll do my best to stay away from.

Women that are dating my closer friends.
Women that are dating my relatives.
Women that are dating my roommates.
Women that are married.


I've had great luck with it. I have news for you....A woman that is in the positions you mentioned above and is fucking around on the side is not happy. They are not going to stay with those guys. My closer friends and I don't argue about it. I live in a small town. I have actually dated my buddies' ex-wives. They don't care. I don't have any relatives around here other than my brother, and he and I have different tastes. So it's never been a problem. I'm getting a new roomie in a couple of months, she's my best friend. She already told me that she's getting me laid (lol). Married women....if their marriages were good, they wouldn't be taking anything on the side, would they? Your sex life gets the best in your late 20's and early 30's. You know who you are, you have a better fix on your life, and women your age are a lot more experienced and frisky. I swear to God; the best sex I've ever had has been in the last 8 years.




(in reply to VanIsleKnight)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Question About Relationships - 9/15/2009 2:26:25 AM   
blackpearl81


Posts: 506
Joined: 8/30/2005
From: Home of the Yankees
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveboyforyou

I've had great luck with it. I have news for you....A woman that is in the positions you mentioned above and is fucking around on the side is not happy. They are not going to stay with those guys. My closer friends and I don't argue about it. I live in a small town. I have actually dated my buddies' ex-wives. They don't care. I don't have any relatives around here other than my brother, and he and I have different tastes. So it's never been a problem. I'm getting a new roomie in a couple of months, she's my best friend. She already told me that she's getting me laid (lol). Married women....if their marriages were good, they wouldn't be taking anything on the side, would they? Your sex life gets the best in your late 20's and early 30's. You know who you are, you have a better fix on your life, and women your age are a lot more experienced and frisky. I swear to God; the best sex I've ever had has been in the last 8 years.




Preach it, brotha!

Seriously though. To answer the OP:

Not to play devils advocate here, but how do you know that the woman in question hasn't already made up her mind to cheat?

While I do find some lady friends of mine extremely attractive, in the course of casual discussion, they've revealed the want to have an affair.

Do I condone it? No. I've been on the recieving end of a cheating gf/significant other, and I'm sure there are quite a few people here can attest to this:

It's not fun. Not by a long shot.

Would I consider having a marathon fuck session after they split/divorced/whatever? Well.... does a bear shit in the woods? Does the pop wear a funny hat?

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Question About Relationships - 9/15/2009 3:00:28 AM   
VanIsleKnight


Posts: 283
Joined: 8/4/2009
Status: offline 		Women that are dating my closer friends.
Women that are dating my relatives.
Women that are dating my roommates.
Women that are married.

Please note the use of present tense, not past tense.  :)

While the woman may have decided to cheat on whoever she is with, that does not give me the green light to help her out in that.  Especially if I know and respect the guy she is cheating on.  In fact, I would probably tell the guy if he's someone I respect, especially if she tried to sleep with me.  The notion that it's none of my business goes out the window the moment she tries to fuck me.  Or, I will tell her to rethink what she's doing, and talk with her man about whatever is going on with their relationship.  Or I'll just keep my distance and not say a damned word.  It really would depend on the situation and all the tiny complexities involved, which is why I try to stay away from situations like that.  It's complicated, and I dislike needless complications.

Also, I suppose I am just unusual.  I have no doubt my sex life will get better as I get older, my hope remains though that it will be with someone I was lucky enough to find and develop some rather strong feelings for.  Y'know, love, marriage, that whole thing.  Until then, I'm going to try my best to stand by what I believe in, enjoy myself and my life, and play the rest by ear. Rarely do problems in life have a straightforward and easy answer to.

< Message edited by VanIsleKnight -- 9/15/2009 3:01:19 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Question About Relationships - 9/15/2009 3:46:29 AM   
MisReciprocation


Posts: 2
Joined: 9/3/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

People treat people like a used tissue.   One flaw and toss it.   The instant buzz is paramount. 



This really nails some things I've been noticing lately. Not about cheating, but just how people treat other people.

Too true. Which is one reason, I try to keep an open mind about someone I communicate with from the net. There is so much more to them, than what they write, or what they say on the telephone. When I'm dating someone, I try to go out with them at least twice, because sometimes great people make a REALLY BAD first impression.

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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Question About Relationships - 9/15/2009 6:54:52 PM   
Rhodes85


Posts: 445
Joined: 11/15/2008
From: Nova Scotia, Canada
Status: offline 		'Women that are dating my closer friends.
Women that are dating my relatives.
Women that are dating my roommates.
Women that are married. '

I agree. There is a huge difference between a woman that is screwing around on the side anyway and one who is happily married. I would not knowingly, under any circumstances persue a woman that was happily married/in a relationship/with a friend/ etc...

that would show a great amount of immaturity on my part and a great disrespect for her and the person shes involved with. not to mention if the person shes involved with turns out to be a hells angel or something you could have a big problem on your hands. The last thing you need is a pissed off husband going off the deepend, grabbing a gun and going looking for you. and you would be suprised how often it happens.

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Question About Relationships - 9/15/2009 8:10:09 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

from outside the arena of that- IMO  both sexes do and say things that make them less then ideal.

I see unrealistic acts by males- and also by females.  

People treat people like a used tissue.   One flaw and toss it.   The instant buzz is paramount. 



Not to mention those for whom the vows and commitment only become really important when they are arguing against same sex marriages.

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Profile   Post #: 32
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