RE: Own Worst Enemy

RE: Own Worst Enemy (Full Version)

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MasterOwnskitty -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 1:51:13 PM)
My advice, for what it's worth, is to take your time with this person and get to know him. Eventually, the truth will come out and I believe you'll know in your heart who he is to you. I really hope all good circumstances come your way and you'll become happier as a result.

JohnWarren -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 1:58:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RavenMuse quote: ORIGINAL: angelic that is why, Sir.. if He is not comfortable in giving it out then if i ask, i have then put Him in a position that He will be uncomfortable with. ok thinking this thru, i suppose i could just give Him my phone number... if He choses to call that is His choice. Wrong, you are removing his chance to make a choise by not telling him it is something that would help a problem you are having. If he is not ready to give you his number then he should have no problem in saying exactly that. Look at the Doms you respect around here.... would any of them have a problem with saying no if they wished to? Would that cause them any discomfort? or would you think they would say no tell you why and move on with the conversation? How would IronBear react?, KoM?, Myself? Personaly if you thought it would help you get over the trust issue even slightly then I wouldn't just think you had a right to ask, I would say you had a duty to mention it.... You can't expect him to read your mind dear. I tend to give out my phone number pretty freely. The only restriction is I have to be comfortable the recipient is someone with whom Libby would feel comfortable talking. While most of the time the people to whom I give the phone number are calling for advice and such, I'd suggest to Angelic she may be putting the cart before the horse feeling so "taken" by a man before she's even heard his voice. This is part of my general suggestion to people to keep back the intensity of feeling before they really "know" the other person.

BitaTruble -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 2:15:25 PM)
quote: i'm trying LOL... and as you said it has only been a week (egads i just wondered what He would think if He saw all of this)... He would run for the freaking hills and Wwho could blame him? lol Might be the best thing in the world.. point out this thread to him and see what happens. Right now, you haven't invested that much time. If you really think he'll run for the hills by this expression, let him.. that's better for you. Then you just move on, no harm, no foul. If he doesn't run for the hills.. that's better for you as well. Win-win, even if it doesn't appear that way when they run. I really like what RavenMuse posted to you as well... sensible, realistic and down to Earth. ::and I'm not saying that just because he's one of my other favorite posters either!:: quote: Personaly if you thought it would help you get over the trust issue even slightly then I wouldn't just think you had a right to ask, I would say you had a duty to mention it.... You can't expect him to read your mind dear. Celeste

angelic -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 2:15:41 PM)
thank Yyou Aall for Yyour comments!!! it is truly appreciated! [:D]

RavenMuse -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 2:22:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JohnWarren I tend to give out my phone number pretty freely. The only restriction is I have to be comfortable the recipient is someone with whom Libby would feel comfortable talking. Quite. The young lady I am getting to know had my mobile number within a week of us first getting in touch. Basicaly as soon as I realised things had some real potential to go to what we both seem to be looking for. quote: This is part of my general suggestion to people to keep back the intensity of feeling before they really "know" the other person. Even I find that bit difficult John. Maybe it is because this part is something I am not used to doing on-line and things usualy (Well usualy for me) have had the opportunity to move at a much faster pace in the real world. But to do things safely you have to make yourself take things at a slower speed.

Littlepita -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 2:26:11 PM)
What let me know my Sir was for real was how honest he was. Once we decided to give this lifestyle and us a try he immediately told me I could ask him anything and he would tell me. Also once we decided we had to be together he wasted no time in taking steps to make that happen. So like the others have said it takes time and asking a lot of questions then evaluting the answers. Also most important of all is to really listen to your heart. What is it telling you? Be honest with yourself and him and hope for the best. [:)]

powerless1 -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 2:38:12 PM)
I am new here and perhaps don't know as much as most. I can relate to your concern because I come from a very abusive relationship that ended in his attempt to try to kill me (truly). It took me a long time to stop being a victim and regain my self confidence, but believe it or not, it was another relationship that helped me work through the pain. I have experienced your hesitation and can relate. I understand when you say "it's not my place" to get his phone number. When I have been in similar situations, I simply say the following (after, of course, being given permission to speak if needed): "If it is your wish Sir, may we exchange phone numbers so that Sir may call me on the telephone if he needs me and so that I may do the same?" Usually, this type of question opens the door for discussion on the issue and often will prompt him to lay out the ground rules as to when you are to call, how often, etc.

angelic -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 2:42:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BitaTruble quote: i'm trying LOL... and as you said it has only been a week (egads i just wondered what He would think if He saw all of this)... He would run for the freaking hills and Wwho could blame him? lol Might be the best thing in the world.. point out this thread to him and see what happens. Right now, you haven't invested that much time. If you really think he'll run for the hills by this expression, let him.. that's better for you. Then you just move on, no harm, no foul. If he doesn't run for the hills.. that's better for you as well. Win-win, even if it doesn't appear that way when they run. I really like what RavenMuse posted to you as well... sensible, realistic and down to Earth. ::and I'm not saying that just because he's one of my other favorite posters either!:: quote: Personaly if you thought it would help you get over the trust issue even slightly then I wouldn't just think you had a right to ask, I would say you had a duty to mention it.... You can't expect him to read your mind dear. Celeste Actually bitatruble i have thought about doing just that. i cannot expect Aanyone to read my mind as Yyou said. Bottom line if i wish to be treated fairly, i most certainly should treat Another the same way.

angelic -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 2:44:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JohnWarren quote: ORIGINAL: RavenMuse quote: ORIGINAL: angelic that is why, Sir.. if He is not comfortable in giving it out then if i ask, i have then put Him in a position that He will be uncomfortable with. ok thinking this thru, i suppose i could just give Him my phone number... if He choses to call that is His choice. Wrong, you are removing his chance to make a choise by not telling him it is something that would help a problem you are having. If he is not ready to give you his number then he should have no problem in saying exactly that. Look at the Doms you respect around here.... would any of them have a problem with saying no if they wished to? Would that cause them any discomfort? or would you think they would say no tell you why and move on with the conversation? How would IronBear react?, KoM?, Myself? Personaly if you thought it would help you get over the trust issue even slightly then I wouldn't just think you had a right to ask, I would say you had a duty to mention it.... You can't expect him to read your mind dear. I tend to give out my phone number pretty freely. The only restriction is I have to be comfortable the recipient is someone with whom Libby would feel comfortable talking. While most of the time the people to whom I give the phone number are calling for advice and such, I'd suggest to Angelic she may be putting the cart before the horse feeling so "taken" by a man before she's even heard his voice. This is part of my general suggestion to people to keep back the intensity of feeling before they really "know" the other person. i very much respect what You are saying, Sir. Thank You for Your suggestions.

angelic -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 2:48:04 PM)
btw RavenMuse is also one of my favorite posters. He's honest, upfront, straightforward and i've yet to see Him be unkind to another.

RavenMuse -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 3:03:02 PM)
Ladies, thank you for the compliments. I don't blush like IB but I guess I best go be unkind to someone now before you two ruin my street cred Picks up a stick to beat someone with Oh on second thoughts.... knowing the folks around here they would only enjoy it! Puts stick away [;)]

angelic -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 3:04:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RavenMuse Ladies, thank you for the compliments. I don't blush like IB but I guess I best go be unkind to someone now before you two ruin my street cred Picks up a stick to beat someone with Oh on second thoughts.... knowing the folks around here they would only enjoy it! Puts stick away [;)] ROFLMAO... i rest my case... He put the stick away [;)]

RavenMuse -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 3:23:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: angelic ROFLMAO... i rest my case... He put the stick away [;)] For some folks here, me putting the stick away would be the unkindest thing I could do![;)]

Cloudz -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 3:25:48 PM)
angelic, In truth this post is probably more for me than for you, I doubt I can add any insights you have not already heard. I understand the excitement and the swept off my feet feeling that you are probably on the verge of. I understand wanting to put your "best" submissive foot forward, and not wanting to cross any boundaires...but sweetie a week into it? If I remember your posts right you came across as a very strong lady, submissive but not willing to take any crap in the name of Dominance...may I suggest you re-read some of your earlier thoughts and ideals to reaquaint your self with yourself. Chances are excellent you will engage a few wankers, some of them are quite good at manipulation and playing the part. A voice on the phone will at least be able to reassure you that it is indeed a male you are dealing with. A phone number will tell you if he is indeed in the area he claims. Two questions down..1 million to go. Enjoy the journey, but do not leave yourself behind at the first rest area! I was tempted to cut and paste KoM's comments and tell you that I agree with every word, thinking maybe you could hear it better from a female Dominant than a male. Be well, but above all...be true to yourself.

angelic -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 3:35:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Cloudz angelic, In truth this post is probably more for me than for you, I doubt I can add any insights you have not already heard. I understand the excitement and the swept off my feet feeling that you are probably on the verge of. I understand wanting to put your "best" submissive foot forward, and not wanting to cross any boundaires...but sweetie a week into it? If I remember your posts right you came across as a very strong lady, submissive but not willing to take any crap in the name of Dominance...may I suggest you re-read some of your earlier thoughts and ideals to reaquaint your self with yourself. Chances are excellent you will engage a few wankers, some of them are quite good at manipulation and playing the part. A voice on the phone will at least be able to reassure you that it is indeed a male you are dealing with. A phone number will tell you if he is indeed in the area he claims. Two questions down..1 million to go. Enjoy the journey, but do not leave yourself behind at the first rest area! I was tempted to cut and paste KoM's comments and tell you that I agree with every word, thinking maybe you could hear it better from a female Dominant than a male. Be well, but above all...be true to yourself. thank you for your kind words... i am not yet 'swept' off my feet... my feet, arms and legs are very firmly gripping, clutching and hugging tightly the treetop owned spoke of. LOL

ownedgirlie -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 4:44:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: angelic i am not yet 'swept' off my feet... my feet, arms and legs are very firmly gripping, clutching and hugging tightly the treetop owned spoke of. LOL LOL i hear there's a breeze comin'......[;)]

angelic -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 5:10:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie quote: ORIGINAL: angelic i am not yet 'swept' off my feet... my feet, arms and legs are very firmly gripping, clutching and hugging tightly the treetop owned spoke of. LOL LOL i hear there's a breeze comin'......[;)] lmfao.. it may take a freakin' hurricane to get me off this tree [;)]

angelic -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 5:12:28 PM)
Sincerely, though... thank Yyou Aall... this is why i come here... Yyou are Aall so wonderful... and i do appreciate Eeach and Eeveryone (even the assholes)... lol i wonder if that will be censored. [:D]

Real0ne -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 5:40:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RavenMuse quote: ORIGINAL: JohnWarren I tend to give out my phone number pretty freely. The only restriction is I have to be comfortable the recipient is someone with whom Libby would feel comfortable talking. Quite. The young lady I am getting to know had my mobile number within a week of us first getting in touch. Basicaly as soon as I realised things had some real potential to go to what we both seem to be looking for. thats the exact benchmark i use for giving mine out, with exception to those who are paranoid about fakes. i drop it on them right away.

Prunesquallor -> RE: Own Worst Enemy (2/26/2006 5:52:46 PM)
It's very simple. Take things slowly. Recognise red flags if you see them - don't ignore them. And talk as much as you possibly can before doing anything else. And, for what it's worth, I think he's a lucky guy. :)

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