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Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 6:03:07 PM

DarkSteven

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I was wondering if anyone else was like this.

I find that I cam pretty sharp online and on the phone. I can pick up on subtle things like hesitation when someone else replies, etc.

In person, I actually tend to be less aware of what's going on. I assume that I key more to body language and miss vocal inflections, and the words' actual meanings.

Anyone else find that they're less sharp in person?

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 6:16:41 PM

CaringandReal

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I think this is common, but certainly not your flavor of it. Most people who are better online than in person are so because they're shy, and online communicating provides enough distance/safety that they can let down their inhibitions a bit.

I've know people so good at online communication that they accurately and repeatedly guessed feelings that were not obvious and that I wasn't sharing from just the cues the text box gives. I almost believe that there's some sort of esp at work with people like that.

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 6:22:55 PM

Level

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I think part of it may also be that, online, you are able to step back a moment from a post, and "study" it, whereas in person, one is more pressed to react instantly. Just that little bit of time can make a difference.

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 6:23:03 PM

SirLost

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I'm not good in expressing myself in person. I can build sophisticated sentences only when I have the opportunity to write (or time to think over them, at most), but verbal communication is a torment for me. I believe it is because of me thinking too much over what I am saying; it's much easier when I'm with my family and close friends, because I find the opportunity to express whatever rolls through my mind without an inspection process.

But I believe I'm good in perceiving the other's instantaneous thoughts and feelings let it be verbal or written.

< Message edited by SirLost -- 9/5/2009 6:24:01 PM >

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 6:57:41 PM

SweetNika

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For me it is the fact that I can edit myself online where in real life there is no back space button. I don't do good with people alot of the time, meeting new people and crowds really cause me issues so online I am able to interact w/o those anxieties rearing their ugly heads.

< Message edited by SweetNika -- 9/5/2009 7:33:30 PM >

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 7:31:37 PM

Fnordstrum

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In general, both overall shyness in person and the ability to take extra time to think about what you're saying, makes communicating with people online easier than in person, for the most part... At least for me, anyway.

Fnord.

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 7:40:46 PM

porcelaine

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Anyone else find that they're less sharp in person?

not at all. i find my communication skills are equal in both places. perhaps you're shy and need to be coaxed out of your shell?

porcelaine

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 7:44:09 PM

VampiresLair

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I find that the delay in communications in an online and even a phone conversation make a big difference. I find it is much easier for me to read a person face to face, but that a lot of people have extremely different communication and conversation styles when they have to actually think on their feet as opposed to having the time delay to think up wittier things to say online, on IMs and on the phone.

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 9:06:27 PM

lronitulstahp

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quote:

Anyone else find that they're less sharp in person?

i think knowing me Steven...You can agree that the answer would be a resounding "No!".
Just not sure if that's a good or bad thing

.....

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 10:10:37 PM

LadyPact

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For Myself, I do tend to think that I am better on line than in person. I base this on the fact that I don't hear as well in certain situations as I would like. The phone is My worst communication tool. Unless I'm in a situation where I can kill all of the background noise, I'll miss some of the conversation.

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/5/2009 10:18:12 PM

soul2share

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Well, I tend to be a little freer with my thoughts here online, but I do like face to face interaction also. I tend to censor myself when first meeting new people, since my sense of humor can be a little strange to some......it's purely cop humor......which when done with other cops, it's funny as hell, but others don't really appreciate it like we do. Which is something I forget when at home with my mom....she thinks my sister, who is a nurse and EMT, and I can be rather cold hearted sometimes.

That and I'm shy too....the anonimity of online helps me break thru that. but once I do, I'm retty much the same person in real life that I am here....yeah, I know...scary!

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/6/2009 12:55:02 AM

DesFIP

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Are you very distractable? Because if so, then you will let your attention wander when something else happens in the room. Say you meet at Starbucks, you will lose focus when you see someone walk by with a good looking piece of cake and wonder what kind it is.

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/6/2009 3:15:18 AM

DarkSteven

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Did someone say cake?

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The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/6/2009 4:26:27 AM

subtlebutterfly

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

I was wondering if anyone else was like this.

I find that I cam pretty sharp online and on the phone. I can pick up on subtle things like hesitation when someone else replies, etc.

In person, I actually tend to be less aware of what's going on. I assume that I key more to body language and miss vocal inflections, and the words' actual meanings.

Anyone else find that they're less sharp in person?

...honey, you're a man!
'nuff said.

*runs*

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/6/2009 5:02:56 AM

sirsholly

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Did someone say cake?

Celeste...if your piece of cake is bigger than Stevens...you will NEVER hear the end of it.

Trust me on this.....there was a time when i got a bigger cookie......

< Message edited by sirsholly -- 9/6/2009 5:03:18 AM >

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/6/2009 6:40:47 AM

kdsub

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I think it depends on what you mean by communication…Yes you may, like Level says, have the luxury of time to analyze and research a post and craft an intelligent response but are you really communicating fully?

I’m sure someone will post a link or have better input on this subject but I believe you can only communicate truthfully face to face. I’ll bet we don’t even realize how much information we give out simply by the look in our eyes…or the twitch of a muscle...or the smile on a face. Yes you did mention the hesitation in a voice when on the phone and that is important but only a part of your true voice…which includes words sound and looks.

There is a lot more to you then just words.... true "communicating" is not hiding behind words...said with a smug smile

Butch

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/6/2009 6:44:29 AM

petmonkey

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

I was wondering if anyone else was like this.

I find that I cam pretty sharp online and on the phone. I can pick up on subtle things like hesitation when someone else replies, etc.

In person, I actually tend to be less aware of what's going on. I assume that I key more to body language and miss vocal inflections, and the words' actual meanings.

Anyone else find that they're less sharp in person?

(*whispering* Yes.)

i'm awful at giving phone. i'm better at giving letter. i'm poor at basic conversation. i'm a listener and a ponderer. Often people don't pause long enough or watch my body language enough so they assume i don't have a reply or aren't giving one. Every so often, i'll natter. This should be a red flag that something is amiss for someone who knows me, unless it's one of those rare, rare occasions where the "conversation chemistry" is very high from the beginning of the friendship.

edited to add: there's cake? i have a cake wedge shaped hole in my belly. Excuse me, i'm off to the grocery store.

< Message edited by petmonkey -- 9/6/2009 6:48:19 AM >

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/6/2009 7:06:25 AM

MsRose

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I believe I'm a good communicator when it comes to online exchanges. I'm even sharper in face-to-face encounters. Perhaps like some here, a little too sharp. I tend to tease people when I first meet them and perhaps that's me just finding my comfort zone and limitations with strangers.

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/6/2009 8:07:40 AM

DarkSteven

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Did someone say cake?

Celeste...if your piece of cake is bigger than Stevens...you will NEVER hear the end of it.

Trust me on this.....there was a time when i got a bigger cookie......

For God's sake, holly, haven't you gotten over the cookie thing yet?

And yours WAS better than mine!

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to sirsholly)

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RE: Better communicator online than in person? - 9/6/2009 8:55:46 AM

kyraofMists

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For myself, it is a result of being an extreme introvert (but I am not shy). Online is my medium of choice when it comes to commmunicating. It takes quite a bit of time for me to get the words for the thoughts that are in my head and online gives me that space and time to think and process.

In person the space and time to process are extremely curtailed by the other parties need to keep the converation going. Most people cannot stand silence and the silence I need in order to process what has been said and then respond to it is something others have a hard time giving.

Knight's Kyra

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