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How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/11/2009 11:28:37 AM   
sweetcheeksbbw


Posts: 13
Joined: 9/9/2009
Status: offline 		I recently reconnected with someone that I dated almost 20 years ago.  I have always been a very confident woman but never really considered myself Domme until a few years ago.  Anyhow, I found it interesting that when I reconnected with him, he said that he considered me Domme even in my early 20's.

When did you first know that you were a true Domme?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/11/2009 12:58:03 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		I kind of had a similar experience. I never knew of many things and never really gave it all much thought. As I look back now... omg! lol I know I got away with a lot because I was such a tiny child, but man I was running the kindergarden class in a lot of ways and was always capturing the boys and making them stay where I put them.

My first husband, I married very young and he just came to visit after not seeing one another for about 24 years. He said I taught him a great deal back then and am still teaching him things and he is way older than I am and he isn't stupid. He calls me his life teacher.

I did have two male wive's in my twenties. I loved what I called the role reversal.

So it was always there, I just didn't have a name for what I did. But I didn't come out and say I was a dominant until.. humm... about three or four years ago.

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to sweetcheeksbbw)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/11/2009 2:16:00 PM   
sweetcheeksbbw


Posts: 13
Joined: 9/9/2009
Status: offline 		Hello Lockit ~

Thanks so much for sharing your story with me.  I have found an acceptance in the community that has long been missing from my life.

I adore your term 'male wife' and plan on using it in the future.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/11/2009 2:22:14 PM   
daintydimples


Posts: 967
Joined: 7/6/2009
Status: offline 		People told me. I didn't think how I acted was all that unusual. I was in the lifestyle for years before someone told me: "I sense a submissive side to you." I married him.




_____________________________

Some soften by the forced reflection that comes from loss; others harden. Which are you?




(in reply to sweetcheeksbbw)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/11/2009 10:32:52 PM   
XaviersXian


Posts: 525
Joined: 9/8/2007
From: Australia
Status: offline 		greetings to all,

I've had a dominant, "take charge, get what I want and need" nature my entire life.  It is something I've never analysed, because it's always been with me.  I've always known exactly what it is, and how to use it to my advantage.  With that being said though, I am always careful about expressing it; I keep it well in check around my husband/Master. 

I have come to consider myself a "beta" individual, who will submit to those with a stronger personality than my own, and I'm totally fine with that.

well wishes,

< Message edited by XaviersXian -- 9/11/2009 10:41:48 PM >

(in reply to daintydimples)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/11/2009 10:44:36 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		I've been a natural leader all My life, even in situations where I've tried real hard to get out of leading! Leaders have followers ... so I can see looking back that I've attracted s-types along the way. When I discovered bdsm it was no surprise to others that I moved into the D role, that seemed very natural. What surprised the hell out of most people (and a bit to me too!) was that there was a sub side in me as well. i knew there was a bottom who wanted to experience things for myself ... but over time i realised that there was a sub/slave in there too ... and the relative proportions of D to s went from an initial estimate of 90:10 to 50:50! However it's only been the last 10 years that I've known about D/s and identified myself that way. It was first recognised by someone on a general adult chat site who suggested I could make a great Dominant and was a willing guinea pig for My research and experimentation! I am so grateful to that guy ...

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

_____________________________

Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

(in reply to XaviersXian)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/12/2009 3:46:14 AM   
MissDita


Posts: 33
Joined: 4/13/2008
Status: offline 		I only found out 2 years ago. I just broke up with My ex, there was something about him that attracted Me. I knew what it was, I called it 'excentric'. I couldn't find it in other guys. Well around that time I was also playing this online game 'Second life', and I rolled into the virtual bdsm-lifestyle. (My ex introduced Me to the game) I started to feel the desire to experience it in real life. So one time I 'googled' bdsm. And a whole new world opened for Me. Couple months later I wrote that ex an email about My discovery of bdsm. And he confessed to Me that he had been a total slave for 11years with a Mistress in Spain, before he met Me. And the 2 years W/we had been together, he never told Me about these desires or about bdsm. But I guess unconsiously he showed Me the way to find out for Myself and I'm very gratefull for that. Otherwise I maybe would have found out after another 10-20 years.

When I could put the name bdsm to it, I realised there are many guys out there that are submissive and I finally found out what it was I was looking for in a relationship.

When I look back, it has always been there. I always have been the dominant one in a relationship. And I can find bdsm-desires going back since I was a child.


< Message edited by MissDita -- 9/12/2009 3:49:16 AM >

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/12/2009 4:20:49 AM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		I am a natural leader, a decision maker and have been since I was very young. I do not need, want or desire anyone to attempt to lead my life as I am perfectly capable of doing it myself.

Some women are leaders, some are followers and some swing between those trees.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to sweetcheeksbbw)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/13/2009 2:02:27 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetcheeksbbw



When did you first know that you were a true Domme?



When I met my parents..... shortly after birth!

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to sweetcheeksbbw)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/13/2009 2:26:28 AM   
subtlebutterfly


Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: Not your hood
Status: offline 		I guess I cannot tell you how I got dominant, but once I fell flat on my face and then it dawned upon me....I'm a submissive! so if I hadn't fallen on my face..then I probably wouldn't be submissive today
...this story always makes me so emotional..can't help it..so... touching


_____________________________

~Ms. Awesomeness to YOU!~

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/13/2009 9:34:19 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		I didn't even know what a "domme" was until a few years ago. It wasn't that much further back that I understood that not all gay women  wore leather and/or acted/dressed, like the opposite gender. I grew up in a bit of a vaccum and spent the bulk of my life focused on working and raising kids. Fun and sexuality was way down on my list of, important things to give a damn about. Seriously.

However, I have always been dominant. And I have always thought women were waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy sexier than men.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to sweetcheeksbbw)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/13/2009 9:45:51 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I was raised by dominant women, and my personality just developed that way.  I was raised to serve, and I am good at serving, but submission?  I don't even *understand* the desire to submit.  I just say Thank you very much!  to those that want to serve me!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/13/2009 9:55:43 AM   
Sunnyfey


Posts: 1436
Joined: 9/21/2007
From: OK
Status: offline 		Just kind of smacked me in the back of the head one day.

I had no clue I was remotely "dominant" in the fashion a Domme is.

I came to the big realization one day after reading a for a long time, and I called my biddy up and was like "Holy fuck beans batman, I think I'm a switch!" and he was like "And the last horse crosses the finish line...."

true story...that's the sad part.


< Message edited by Sunnyfey -- 9/13/2009 9:57:20 AM >

_____________________________

Resident Hell Cat



(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/13/2009 1:34:26 PM   
MsD


Posts: 68
Joined: 4/25/2004
Status: offline 		I tend to think of my own dominant discovery as a lifelong journey, a journey that included people in my life who tried to keep me in a submissive position to them. All I knew at those points was that I was miserably unhappy. It wasn't until I divorced my 1st husband that I began to blossom. I began to become comfortable with my true nature with the guidance, support, & encouragement from my 2nd husband. My introduction to bdsm & D/s was via chat & the internet some 11 yrs ago. By that time, there was never any question whether I was Domme or sub. I knew without question I was/am/will always be dominant.

(in reply to Sunnyfey)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 9/14/2009 8:06:13 AM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		I was intrigued by "The Pearl" and it led to a lot of fantasies, but it never occurred to me that I might actually *do* any of that stuff for real, since it was far too intense. When I was 20, a guy I'd known for a couple of years and was in my group of friends at community college asked me out. On the 3rd or 4th date, he mentioned that he enjoyed being tied up with scarves and spanked. I was game to give it a try, and things expanded from there, for both of us. He became my submissive for about 5 years.

(in reply to MsD)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 10/9/2011 7:25:18 PM   
flash350


Posts: 3
Joined: 11/12/2008
Status: offline 		Hi Thomas here love your stories.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 10/9/2011 7:26:36 PM   
flash350


Posts: 3
Joined: 11/12/2008
Status: offline 		Hoping to meet you and get to know you Goddess. Thomas

(in reply to sweetcheeksbbw)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 10/9/2011 7:59:00 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		NECRO THREAD!!!!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to flash350)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 10/9/2011 8:02:20 PM   
JanahX


Posts: 3443
Joined: 8/21/2010
Status: offline

_____________________________

The first rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club.

The second rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club.


(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: How did you first know were a Domme? - 10/9/2011 9:02:43 PM   
Hisprettybaby


Posts: 781
Joined: 4/13/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetcheeksbbw
When did you first know that you were a true Domme?

First of all, WTF did anyone resuscitate a two year old thread!? Why!?

Secondly, I don't think there is such a thing as a "real" or "true" anything. Real and true are different things to different people.

That being said, I entered kink in October 2008 as totally submissive. A few months ago, I realized I'm a switch and, yes, I can be a "true Domme." I can be a true submissive to Daddy and also a true Domme to some man when we rightly click with each other. I've Dommed before and I will do it again.

When I first came into kink, a sub guy wanted me to cyber-Top him and he always told me he thought I could Domme. I never believed him and now I know I can....and do....Domme in real time. And I'm getting better and better at it as time goes by. Practice, ya know.....

~Hisprettybaby~

(in reply to sweetcheeksbbw)
Profile   Post #: 20
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