How to start? (has this been discussed)

How to start? (has this been discussed) (Full Version)

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blkswitch -> How to start? (has this been discussed) (9/14/2009 11:15:00 PM)
I'm new and believe I'd like to be dominated. But on the other hand, I enjoy the idea of having a slave. So, I consider myself a switch. Is this correct?

DarkSteven -> RE: How to start? (has this been discussed) (9/15/2009 1:18:45 AM)
There's a handy term, bi-curious, which means that you've never played with a member of the same sex but are curious about it. In a similar vein, I'd call you switch-curious. There are all kinds of labels - submissive, slave, bottom, switch, Dom/me, Master, Top - and all sorts of nuances differentiating between them. You simply sound open minded and willing to try things. After you try things and see if they work for you, you can apply labels accordingly.

lizi -> RE: How to start? (has this been discussed) (9/15/2009 12:34:23 PM)
To kind of continue with what DarkSteven has said...label yourself a switch but let people know you're new at things and are exploring. When I put it out there that I was new to the whole idea of BDSM I found people were very helpful and tolerant of the fact that I didn't know much and actually helped out with teaching me things along the way.

Acer49 -> RE: How to start? (has this been discussed) (9/15/2009 1:05:28 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: blkswitch I'm new and believe I'd like to be dominated. But on the other hand, I enjoy the idea of having a slave. So, I consider myself a switch. Is this correct? Since you lack experience, it would be fair to label yourself at this point. I would say you have switch tendenances. Maybe a few years, down the road then you can reassess your feelings and be confident that you have prorerly examined youself and then can say "I am (insert label)"

AngelGeena -> RE: How to start? (has this been discussed) (9/15/2009 1:07:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven There are all kinds of labels - submissive, slave, bottom, switch, Dom/me, Master, Top - and all sorts of nuances differentiating between them. You simply sound open minded and willing to try things. After you try things and see if they work for you, you can apply labels accordingly. There you have it.

lovingpet -> RE: How to start? (has this been discussed) (9/15/2009 1:21:14 PM)
I know, for the little box on your profile you need a label. Aside from that, though, do really believe yourself to be at the point where you can say one label fits better than another? My label issues still rage on to this day and I have been exploring at some level now for three years (I know, still just a whippersnapper to some LOL). Tick whichever box seems close enough to a fit, explain you are new and what you think you want in your profile, and leave enough room for others to show you some new things as well. Your own personal identity will solidify over time just as much as it will change. Labels are harmless enough to remove if it becomes necessary. Just go with what fits your understanding of yourself best. lovingpet

JezzaV -> RE: How to start? (has this been discussed) (9/18/2009 4:31:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lizi To kind of continue with what DarkSteven has said...label yourself a switch but let people know you're new at things and are exploring. When I put it out there that I was new to the whole idea of BDSM I found people were very helpful and tolerant of the fact that I didn't know much and actually helped out with teaching me things along the way. Hammer. Nail. Head. Myself, I suppose I'm a Dom, but since my love and I are not full-time lifestylers I might sometimes be considered a Master (a term I always find amusing since I believe a true Master requires complete Mastery of every aspect of himself - and so would never refer to himself as a "Master" of anything, since the more we learn and gain mastery of, the more we see how much we do not know and have yet to learn). Other times it's nice to snuggle up for good old-fashioned carerss, cuddles and sweet, slow lurve-makin'. So hang on... I'm Vanilla??? I tend not to bother about labels too much. I'm ME. And that's what's really important.

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