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Respect - 3/1/2006 8:38:04 PM   
GymRatwithballs


Posts: 6
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please tell me why as a sub male I should be seeking a Domme who respects me?
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RE: Respect - 3/1/2006 8:43:20 PM   
Evanesce


Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
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quote:

please tell me why as a sub male I should be seeking a Domme who respects me?


Speaking from my Domme side, I'd have to say I wouldn't want a sub or slave I DIDN'T respect, but I'm curious as to why you'd want a Domme who didn't.

_____________________________

Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich


(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
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RE: Respect - 3/1/2006 8:51:09 PM   
GymRatwithballs


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Perhaps I have the description of respect all wrong.
Why I wouldn't?
I'm a man / male! Isn't respect the description given for someone who idleizes, thinks the most of,desires to be in thier shoes,(per say),wants to be just like them,wants them as a buddy or a friend?
What is your description of respect?

(in reply to Evanesce)
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RE: Respect - 3/1/2006 9:03:10 PM   
september


Posts: 26
Joined: 1/17/2006
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Respect comes from within. I mean you can MAKE someone respect you. But when it is pushed, then the pushed one generally finds some sort of way to get revenge through passive aggression. Those that want to deal with respectful people have a standard. You can call it trust or whatever but, for me, I don't want some piece of paper around me. Those people are boring and I need a challenge. I am somewhat dominant even in the vanilla world but I don't want to be around people I can walk all over. Respect is a clear concept of bondaries. I know in this world we seek to forego bondaries but some must be present, everyone has to have something to bring to the table.

_____________________________

I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat. ~Rebecca West, 1913

(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
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RE: Respect - 3/1/2006 9:13:28 PM   
Evanesce


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Joined: 9/14/2005
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quote:

Isn't respect the description given for someone who idleizes, thinks the most of,desires to be in thier shoes,(per say),wants to be just like them,wants them as a buddy or a friend?


I'd tend to call that idolization. Or perhaps hero worship.

quote:

What is your description of respect?


Got a dictionary handy? Aside from the basic Webster's definition, it's also the recognition of a person's worth. To me, if a slave had no worth, why would I want them?


_____________________________

Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich


(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
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RE: Respect - 3/1/2006 9:14:53 PM   
Misstoyou


Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GymRatwithballs

please tell me why as a sub male I should be seeking a Domme who respects me?


Because if I don't respect you and think you're a person of value, I'd have no interest in owning you. I deserve only the best.

_____________________________

~ Miss Marie

a.k.a. "mean Lady"


(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
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RE: Respect - 3/1/2006 10:35:19 PM   
MistressOfGa


Posts: 2929
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GymRatwithballs

please tell me why as a sub male I should be seeking a Domme who respects me?

If you would rather find a Mistress who does not respect you, you can. No one is telling you that you have to find a Mistress who respects you. I do, however, believe that is she does respect you, you are going to be more inclined to respect yourself. I cant respect anyone who does not respect himself/herself. I should think that you would want the very best in your choice for a Mistress, just as she would like to have the very best in her choice for a submissive. Respect for each other goes a long way in finding each other and having a healthy D/s relationship.

_____________________________





(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
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RE: Respect - 3/1/2006 10:47:12 PM   
slavejali


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You should find a Mistress that respects you so that she has regard for your welfare.

Think about this, say you owned something you didnt have any respect for, you wouldnt treat it very well and you wouldnt care what happened to the item.

If you want a Mistress to treat your harshly or even degredate you, thats fine, there are many Mistresses that would be into that, it doesnt mean she wouldnt have respect for you.

(in reply to MistressOfGa)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 12:12:32 AM   
MsPurrmeow


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re·spect (rĭ-spĕkt') pronunciation
tr.v., -spect·ed, -spect·ing, -spects.

1. To feel or show deferential regard for; esteem.
2. To avoid violation of or interference with: respect the speed limit.
3. To relate or refer to; concern.

I would not want to waste my time on a person for whom I had nor respect. I wouldn't waste my time on them at all, much less instructing or training them. I would get no pleasure from a person I did not respect.

Respect is about value. If you want a tyrant who has no respect for others, I'm sure you can pay someone for that hour-long session, or find a temporary hookup here and there. In order to have something ongoing, some level of value in your time and efforts probably needs to exist at some level. For a real relationship, there definitely has to be some level of value placed in a slave in order to trust and rely on them to obey. I cannot trust you to obey without placing some value in you. I cannot trust you intimately at all without some 'respect' that you will follow through.

This IS a two-way street out here in the real world of D/s, and most of us are pretty clear on that. There is always the fantasy of a session with a tyrant and a slave with no value, but it's not realistic for the long-term for most people. You'll find a few who claim it, but be cautious.

(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 12:36:20 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
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quote:

please tell me why as a sub male I should be seeking a Domme who respects me?


Your profile is hilarious and you're damn cute. As for seeking a Domme who respects you.. it's all a matter of personal choice and taste. Seek what you want and that's what you'll find.

;)

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
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RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 6:17:33 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GymRatwithballs

please tell me why as a sub male I should be seeking a Domme who respects me?


Why would you want someone who didn't respect you as a human being?

If you mean respect you as a person, then that's a factor of getting to know each other well enough and finding compatiblity. That can only be a bonus in terms of getting what you both want even if what you want is to give yourself over completely or totally (it goes so much easier when you are compatible to begin with).

On the flip side, why I or any other dominant, want someone I didn't respect? Could I trust them in my house, with my household, or with me if I didn't respect to some degree?


_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 6:24:37 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GymRatwithballs

Perhaps I have the description of respect all wrong.
Why I wouldn't?
I'm a man / male! Isn't respect the description given for someone who idleizes, thinks the most of,desires to be in thier shoes,(per say),wants to be just like them,wants them as a buddy or a friend?
What is your description of respect?


Here's some dictionary definitions:

"To feel or show deferential regard for; esteem"
"To avoid violation of or interference with "
"To relate or refer to; concern"
"feeling of appreciative"
"state of being regarded with honor or esteem"
"willingness to show consideration or appreciation"
"to be polite"
"to have value"
"to treat with consideration"

Note this is a huge word that can cover a lot of things.

I, personally, want to own someone that I feel has value, I have concern for, and even whom I can saw "Wow, look what he can do/think/feel". Someone who kneels to me and serves me but who also has my respect is giving me so much more with his service than someone I don't respect. Odds are I don't even want to be near someone I don't respect.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
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RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 8:56:12 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GymRatwithballs

please tell me why as a sub male I should be seeking a Domme who respects me?



Why wouldn't you?

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 9:23:05 AM   
Evanesce


Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Your profile is hilarious and you're damn cute. As for seeking a Domme who respects you.. it's all a matter of personal choice and taste. Seek what you want and that's what you'll find.


I hadn't even looked at the profile until you said this, Celeste, but Gymrat... if you can really do all that stuff... heck, I'll learn to disrespect you all you want. I've got a three-story house (see the 2nd pic in my profile) in need of paint, insulation and new wallpaper, and I'm not looking forward to doing it all myself this spring. You'd have to move to Indiana, of course. And I'd have to do a LOT of whip practice, 'cause I suck at whip throwing.

_____________________________

Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich


(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 12:30:42 PM   
BeeQueen


Posts: 73
Joined: 9/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GymRatwithballs

please tell me why as a sub male I should be seeking a Domme who respects me?



i d rather want to know y u ask this question ----especially in the way u asked it

Bee

(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 12:38:12 PM   
SimplyV


Posts: 351
Joined: 11/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Evanesce

quote:

Your profile is hilarious and you're damn cute. As for seeking a Domme who respects you.. it's all a matter of personal choice and taste. Seek what you want and that's what you'll find.


I hadn't even looked at the profile until you said this, Celeste, but Gymrat... if you can really do all that stuff... heck, I'll learn to disrespect you all you want. I've got a three-story house (see the 2nd pic in my profile) in need of paint, insulation and new wallpaper, and I'm not looking forward to doing it all myself this spring. You'd have to move to Indiana, of course. And I'd have to do a LOT of whip practice, 'cause I suck at whip throwing.


*rolls on the floor laughing*

OMG.. I didn't say it.. but I had the same thoughts.

(in reply to Evanesce)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 2:14:21 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Evanesce

quote:

Your profile is hilarious and you're damn cute. As for seeking a Domme who respects you.. it's all a matter of personal choice and taste. Seek what you want and that's what you'll find.


I hadn't even looked at the profile until you said this, Celeste, but Gymrat... if you can really do all that stuff... heck, I'll learn to disrespect you all you want. I've got a three-story house (see the 2nd pic in my profile) in need of paint, insulation and new wallpaper, and I'm not looking forward to doing it all myself this spring. You'd have to move to Indiana, of course. And I'd have to do a LOT of whip practice, 'cause I suck at whip throwing.


LOL, I'll share the cost to move him here here as long as you're willing to share him ... we need dog fencing and privacy fencing put up, as well as ductwork repaired, siding repaired, the deck rebuilt, a new deck and sidewalk in the front ... I'll just stop there.

To the OP - I'm with the other Ladies who have posted. I would never own someone that I didn't respect. Holly and I both care deeply for our boys, and that was the plan from the start - this is a long term arrangement (we are planning two marriages for this summer) and that just isn't possible if there is not mutual respect.

(in reply to Evanesce)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 3:54:13 PM   
Misstoyou


Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetDommes

(we are planning two marriages for this summer)



Congratulations!

_____________________________

~ Miss Marie

a.k.a. "mean Lady"


(in reply to SweetDommes)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 6:13:05 PM   
Submotive


Posts: 440
Joined: 9/9/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GymRatwithballs

please tell me why as a sub male I should be seeking a Domme who respects me?


UNBELIEVABLE!!!! That's all i can say. Whatever yanks your chain there guy.

_____________________________

Owned by Scotch Master

i would rather continue alone than be permitted to show only parts of myself to my Beloved.

If you're not living as you would like to today, when are you going to start?

(in reply to GymRatwithballs)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Respect - 3/2/2006 6:31:04 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
Well, there is no answer to this question, you really shouldn't........

You know it, I know it, everyone here knows it......

You have been noticed somewhat as was your intention....

Not sure it would really get you alotta girls, but you sort it out.....

How can I say this and be an equivalent ass? I am not looking for the same kinda girls you are.........

But you will do well, pilgrim........

Way better than the oft forgotten, How do Mistresses feel about vaginal lube on a dildo rammed up mr. brown-eye during forced farting on my face play?

LOL,
Ron

( I really wouldn't understand this if anyone saw this as a rip-off, so send the hate mail directly to me.........)

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to Submotive)
Profile   Post #: 20
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