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MindOvrMatter -> RE: Concern ... or control? (9/29/2009 6:45:09 AM)
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I do not believe that giving one's opinion is controlling and it all boils down to one's motives. I welcome any submissive I am with to give me her opinion, but it's when she begins to assert that opinion in a such a way to try to mold my beliefs around hers, is when it turns into obstinance and unwelcoming to me. Every relationship has boundaries, whether they are plainly stated or merely assumed. In your 'friendship' with this man, he set a boundary when you stated that he "didn't appreciate your being so critical". That's a nice way of saying "Back of bitch" IMHO. Of course, I'm sure that he had this thought in an endearing way...maybe.
Let's be real here and admit that it's not a question about being too critical versus having concern. It's a question of delivery and approach. Any true friend is usually going to welcome some voicing of concern and a bit of constructive criticism at times, but no one wants to constantly be berated by another's EGO. As with everything in life, a little bit of prudence and tact go a long way in our interpersonal communication.
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