Getting Back into it

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Getting Back into it - 9/28/2009 8:05:41 AM

subTeacher4u

Posts: 5
Joined: 9/22/2009
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Hello Everyone,

I would be interested in hearing your opinions regarding those who come into and out of the lifestyle.

I was very active 10 years ago, but have basically been out of the scene for some time.

I find that my past experiences have shaped or defined what I would seek in a submissive if I were to
re-join the lifestyle.

I think I would be a very different Dom than I was ten plus years ago?

Sir

< Message edited by subTeacher4u -- 9/28/2009 8:13:48 AM >

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RE: Getting Back into it - 9/28/2009 8:31:36 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

People change. Maybe you enjoyed public play back then and now you are looking for someone to share a life with and only play privately.

Nobody is going to call you a fake or tear up your dom license because of how you live your life.

Figure out what you want and need, find someone compatible, go and be happy. That's all there is to it.

I will say that your screen name is confusing. I thought you were a sub who was also a teacher.

< Message edited by DesFIP -- 9/28/2009 8:33:13 AM >

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RE: Getting Back into it - 9/28/2009 8:33:55 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

what Des said...

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RE: Getting Back into it - 9/28/2009 8:37:25 AM

tammystarm

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seconds that...

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RE: Getting Back into it - 9/28/2009 11:29:30 AM

subTeacher4u

Posts: 5
Joined: 9/22/2009
Status: offline

Thank you for the replies,

Please let me clarify.

I am secure in my feelings regarding the lifestyle.

I am more curious if those of you who have left and come back,
have found it different or the same

Sir

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RE: Getting Back into it - 9/28/2009 11:39:34 AM

Acer49

Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: subTeacher4u

Hello Everyone,

I would be interested in hearing your opinions regarding those who come into and out of the lifestyle.

I was very active 10 years ago, but have basically been out of the scene for some time.

I find that my past experiences have shaped or defined what I would seek in a submissive if I were to
re-join the lifestyle.

I think I would be a very different Dom than I was ten plus years ago?

Sir

While I am sure that people do change after 10 years, I do not see it being a problem to re-enter the lifestyle

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RE: Getting Back into it - 9/28/2009 2:12:30 PM

kccuckoldmist

Posts: 97
Joined: 7/1/2009
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I was active in a relationship but was out of the public loop for close to a decade like yourself.

I found people and the life when you punch through the internet junk to be very much the same. But what is different is all the misleading information, tone and ego driven babble on the internet has gotten many people starting out in the life are too often trying to find something by looking outward in instead of finding someone and their place by looking inside out.

In other words I have found people seem more prone to try to live up to something and put on false masks then just be themselves and find the right person for them.

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RE: Getting Back into it - 9/28/2009 2:53:37 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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Let Me put it this way. I've been in the lifestyle, then out of it, and then back in again.

I started in one place, then during the break from the lifestyle, I moved somewhere else. I was very active in that location, and then I moved again. I'm still active in the lifestyle, but not as much as when I moved a couple of months ago. As confusing as that sounds, I had to put it out there to clarify My response to you.

Yes, I've seen a lot of changes. Not just because of the passage of time, but also due to various locations. Where I started out was nothing like what I found when I got to the east coast and now the west coast is different than that. Some communities are more close knit groups due to the fact that they are smaller in size than what you might find in larger areas. Some places are heavier in protocol while others are bigger on fetishes. I guess what I'm saying on that it it's the same as the way people talk all across the country. There are different accents for different regions and you're going to find the same when it comes to the BDSM community. Each one has their own flair.

That's not to negate the passage of time factor. Over the years, there have been different influences that have helped to shape our communities. I know folks get tired of hearing Me say it, but the internet has had a big impact. More people have the information about all this at their fingertips than they ever have before. I think in some locations, that has helped the communities grow. In My opinion, we're on the verge of the next wave, which is being prompted by the influence of mass media (different subject) and that's going to have an effect as well.

Yet, I'm just one person and I've formed a lot of My opinions as I've experienced them over time. That's not exactly hard core scientific data because even if the communities have changed or not, I know that I have and I know that I see many things in a different light than when I started out. Over the years, I've been involved in M/s, D/s, the leather community, accepted sadism, and became poly. Even if the communities had stayed the same, I wouldn't see them the same because I'm looking at them through different eyes than when I first started out. It's hard to say if the changes are all in them because I know some of the changes are in Me.

Now, if you'd like to ask Me something specific about a certain area where I feel, in My opinion things have changed, I can provide you with that. However, I'll ask you to keep in mind that My opinion may be flawed by My own perspective and too many variables to be worth much to anyone other than Myself.

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RE: Getting Back into it - 9/28/2009 3:30:36 PM

porcelaine

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Joined: 7/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: subTeacher4u

I am more curious if those of you who have left and come back,
have found it different or the same

things were very different a few years ago before i stepped away. there's been a lot of growth and the emergence of websites geared for the community. i don't see these as negative things and i've been able to meet some interesting people this way. on a personal note my mindset is very different. i've grown and see the lifestyle through different lenses that reflect where i am and where i wish to be. i don't believe stepping away hindered me at all, because i was actively working towards the gains i've made today back then.

i believe people are people and you'll always have a few surprises in the batch both good and bad. regardless if you're on the dominant or submissive end, you bring your experiences into the relationship and they will have the impact you permit. i'm fortunate to have returned in a better place on all levels and recognize how this manifests in my decision making and the caliber of partner i'm seeking. that too has evolved. overall i wouldn't do it any differently. i believe my hiatus has made me a better woman and increased my competency as a slave and role model.

porcelaine

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