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submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/29/2009 1:40:21 PM

NormalOutside

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Hey there, bit of background first. Dominant 34 year old guy and submissive 19 year old girl. Been together about a year, only in person for a couple months. Very solid and growing emotional connection, great D/s connection, plenty of really satisfying sex. Neither of us are into "scenes", acting, or dress-up. We're focused on the D/s bond, power exchange, and pure hedonistic pleasure. :) She likes humiliation, rough sex, mild to moderate pain, and surprises.

The other night I offered her the chance to choose a kinky activity to try. Figured it would be great to know what she was craving, as well as give her the chance to "pick her poison". :D She came back with one word, "rape".

So, she wants me to rape her. I guess I should mention, this isn't referring to non-consensual sex. I have no desire to harm her (or anyone) emotionally or physically. She is my girl and we both consent to our play. If she were to truly need to stop during play, I would. Her safety and well-being are as important to me as my own are.

That said, I'm looking for suggestions on how to make this happen. I'm not going to hire a bunch of cohorts and rent a white cube van, so that's out. It needs to have fairly little setup and expense. I just want to give her a fun and enjoyable rape play experience. What turns you on about rape play or the idea of it? Would humiliation come into it? Would pain come into it? How would it begin? Should I pretend I'm someone else, an actual attacker? Or should I be myself, just forceful, sadistic, and aggressive?

Interested in all opinions. Also interested in hearing any dominant people's views and experiences. Thanks!

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/29/2009 1:53:13 PM

AquaticSub

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I strongly suggest that you start very basic. Remember - you can add more later and you don't want to find triggers when you've got her more than half convinced you are about to kill her.

While plenty of people will tell you how much safewords are a load of BS, I would suggest having some signal or phrase that can be easily IDed. We use his real name. If I say that, I'm in distress and the "rape" needs to stop. As you gain more confidence, keep it or dismiss it. It's not required, it's just another tool. I would also pick a general time for the first attack so she doesn't end up calling 911 on you. That's less than pleasent to explain to the nice police officers...

Also, assess her ability to defend herself and how much of it will be instinct. Valyraen attacked me with a very sharp blade once, taking me completely by surprise. All I saw was a sword coming at me and blocked with the bone of my forearm to keep it from getting to my vital targets. Happily, he was smart enough to turn the edge towards himself so that I just hit the dull edge or he would have been taking me to the ER.

Make sure you ask her about any possible molestation or negative experiences she may have and what might frighten her out of the scene. It might be wise to remind her that even if the first time isn't very edgy, it's very easy to add more as you both gain experience at this. What Valyraen and I have done to avoid me injuring him (not realizing who is attacking) is he will wait until I'm engrossed in a computer game or the CM forums and throw a blanket over my head and drag me to the bed.

I enjoy the loss of freedom, the struggle against him and I fight back as much as I can - trying to push him out of me once he's starting fucking me till I can't stand it anymore and I have to give in. I love his voice in my ear, growling his threats and insulting me. I'd try to get an idea of what she would like to hear before getting started but remember to go with the flow. You can discover new kinks in the middle of play!

There are tons of different ways to do this and hopefully this advice has something that you can take away and find useful in it. I know it's an area of play that we positively adore.

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/29/2009 2:51:58 PM

NormalOutside

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Good call on not forcing it to go all the way the first time. I'm not inexperienced when it comes to rough play, have even played at rape several times with my previous girl, but you're right. Only good can come of using SOME restraint on my part. (Not that kind of restraint, you perverts!)

She's declined a safeword in the past, but I'll suggest one again.

I told her it'll be in the next short while, so she's basically expecting something to happen any time.

She has no abuse history, but good point. And nice idea with the blanket - I believe I'll employ that one!

Thanks for your post. Hungry for more!

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/29/2009 3:06:19 PM

jadedxgirl

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Here's a fun idea: warn her about a burgular[sp?] in the area, that he only strikes at a certain time, then you should 'strike' at said time. ;) You could do role reversal and have her be the burgular and you catching her. She pleads and begs you not to turn her in, so you use that to your advantage.

In my rape fantasies (oh yes, naughty naughty), my rapist is always anonymous. He catches me off guard whether it's in my own home or just walking down the street. :) Humiliation is definitely a turn on for me, maybe taking pictures while I'm bound/gagged, or making me say dirty things about myself by threat of pain. But, that's me. Just tossing some ideas around. Good luck! And maybe you could let us know how it goes? :)

< Message edited by jadedxgirl -- 9/29/2009 3:11:30 PM >

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/29/2009 3:28:56 PM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: NormalOutside

Only good can come of using SOME restraint on my part. (Not that kind of restraint, you perverts!)

But I like those kinds of restraints...

quote:

She's declined a safeword in the past, but I'll suggest one again.

If you think it might help, you can always say it's something at that you want as a temporary measure while you learn her reactions to rape scenes.

quote:

And nice idea with the blanket - I believe I'll employ that one!

Hope you have great results with it! Just don't do it right before a boss fight. That's just too damn sadistic.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 9/29/2009 3:29:32 PM >

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/29/2009 6:33:59 PM

dreamerdreaming

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quote:

ORIGINAL: NormalOutside

I'm not going to hire a bunch of cohorts and rent a white cube van, so that's out.

*pouty face*

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/29/2009 7:13:11 PM

daintydimples

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I like rape play as well. And the first thing I have to say is, you have to talk to her about this. What I would really enjoy in this kind of scene, and what someone else would enjoy, could just be so different. I normally don't want to or need to pre-negotiate every scene - I prefer to remain in the dark about what is going to happen and to be surprised. But this one you really do need to have your boundaries very clear.

Having said that, if she knows exactly what you are going to do, and when, I think it would take away from her level of enjoyment. So you need to get the scene framed in where YOU know what you will be doing, but leave her in the dark about the details. The other big aspect is that surprise factor. It has to be handled in such a way that she does not know when it's coming.

I would ask her to give you several rape fantasies in detail...and then ask questions so you are very clear in terms of your boundaries. Be aware that despite the best possible planning, the potential for you to hit a bad trigger is pretty high.

This kind of play can be a lot of fun when handled right, and a disaster when it is not. feel free to message me on the other side.

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/29/2009 7:25:27 PM

DesFIP

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The problem with expecting her to use a safeword if things go bad is that she may not be able to. On those occasions he's hit an emotional trigger, I shut down and can't talk. Even if he asks if I need to stop, I can't talk, can't look at him, can't respond. He judges by my body language. Do you know hers well enough to know when she's in trouble?

I go rigid, hunch shoulders, try to get into a fetal position, if free may lock myself in the bathroom. You need to know her well enough to stop it before she runs out of the house and never talks to you again.

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/30/2009 1:05:53 AM

allthatjaz

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I go rigid, hunch shoulders, try to get into a fetal position, if free may lock myself in the bathroom. You need to know her well enough to stop it before she runs out of the house and never talks to you again.

OMG you do that too

I even ran half naked out of the house one night and hid but I did come back (obviously)

To the Op.... its crazed play and its easy to get carried away. You need to be her rapist but at the same time on the ball to how she is coping. You need a signal or safeword from her and I wouldn't even attempt to go down that path if she absolutely refuses to give you one. This is not just about her coming away from this sane, this is about the two of you coming away from it sane.
I think there has been some great advice here, especially about communicating with what sort of scenario she wants.
I for example would hate to be suddenly attacked by what I thought was a stranger. Thats a huge no,no to me. I want to be put in fear of my life but then I get off on fear play. Thinking about my forced side is possibly more specific than anything else we do and its only the prior conversations with Steve that have made it come together so well.
You could just start things off by taking her roughly and see how she reacts.

< Message edited by allthatjaz -- 9/30/2009 1:07:45 AM >

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/30/2009 1:11:33 AM

TurboJugend

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At OP

As DesFIP said...know her wel..watch her carefully.

I like rape play simple. If she wants it....I just tell her to wear older cloths and give her a time/date.
( and not to forget a safeword)

Oops..I am not sub...I replied from the frontpage..my appology. Didn't see the forum part this was posted in.

< Message edited by TurboJugend -- 9/30/2009 1:33:47 AM >

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/30/2009 4:06:40 AM

DesFIP

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Turbo, you're allowed to respond in any forum. And from your helpful reminder to make sure she doesn;'t get her best outfit cut off her, it's a good thing you did.

I would love to have him cut my clothes off of me with a hunting knife, but he feels there's too much chance of danger that way. And somehow knowing he was going to do so makes me feel that it might not be as hot as otherwise. I might be wrong in how it would work out.

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/30/2009 6:43:47 AM

Mercnbeth

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quote:

...Here's a fun idea: warn her about a burgular[sp?] in the area, that he only strikes at a certain time, then you should 'strike' at said time. ;) You could do role reversal and have her be the burgular and you catching her. She pleads and begs you not to turn her in, so you use that to your advantage...

speaking from experience as someone whose neighbors actually did this: you might think about telling your neighbors what you are up to so they don't call the cops on you.

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RE: submissives: rape play ideas wanted - 9/30/2009 8:08:34 AM

AnimusRex

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Good ideas, all.

I would also suggest other ideas to make it more convenient:
If you want restraints- ropes, cuffs, etc- make sure you plan it out so they are within reach.
Buy an old dress at a thrift store and have her wear it, so you can rip it off.
See if she wants humiliation or praise- like, does she want you to call her a dirty whore, or admire her for being so sexy you gotta do her.
And yeah, be yourself, if you are aggressive and sadistic. This way your normal play will probably have an edge to it.

As for my experiences, I was asked to help out with one, with a couple. She was to be sleeping, and awakened by burglars who took advantage of a naked girl in bed. I was myself, cool and detached, taking her with calm cruelty, while telling her what a beautiful object she was. We made sure to leave evidence of our conquest like leaving her nighty ripped, hair askew, and um, "DNA material" on her body.

And mostly, realize that fantasies are tricky things and highly dependent on modd, setting, ambience, and such; the way they play out in our heads doesn't always translate to real life. Meaning that if it isn't as hot as she thought it would be, don't worry, that is pretty common.

Enjoy!

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