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sissyshoefetish -> RE: Motivations for accepting pain (12/30/2009 1:56:51 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Surrenderwithin
The main question is: Why do you accept pain from your top ( whatever that top may be)? Is it because it works for you or because your drive is to please the top.
I realize the question was referring to physical pain however I responded like this:
To be brief, which everyone knows is not my strong suit, our kink ( and I use that word lightly) is more about playing with emotional and mental pain and limits moreso than the physical ones. As to my enjoyment of that I am uncertain really. I know that I " need" it and crave it at some very basic level. I know I am willing to engage, and in many cases,endure because it fills that " need" and it pleases him.
So, I suppose my question is... can anyone relate to my answer?
i don't really think its actually about the pain. There is no physiological basis for enjoying pain but you can enjoy the emotional environment around it or the physical aftermath of it (eg endorphins, heightened metabolism, etc).
Consequently i suggest that physical and mental pain are accepted for the same kind of reasons and it is simply the way they are perceived by both parties (which is the preferred route to being sub or dom) that determines which is used.
To respond to your question specifically i would and do accept pain because i want Mistress to have the freedom to hurt me. it is easier to "hurt" physically than emotionally (which requires a more complex interaction) so i am happy if it is more convenient for her to apply a physical hurt. While i used to seek more pain (both as a sub and in physical training) i no longer feel the need so much, but do accept it. i am motiviated however to receive mistreated of both kinds and for the same reasons - because it cements and validates my sense of how i should be dealt with and because Mistress enjoys tormenting me.
i seek mental/emotional mistreatment and accept Mistress's right to use physical means to effect that. if i sought more physical mistreatment i would accept also the emotional/mentasl aspects involved - after all there woudl be little point in the pain withour involving the persona of the person applying it.
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