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M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/11/2009 8:17:17 PM   
hallieB


Posts: 63
Joined: 5/7/2008
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hello E/everyone. i just had to post a short story about this weekend. i will try and keep it short.... Master came to see me this weekend, i have been having issues with my computer and being a kind and generous Master He offered to help. He drove 150 miles one way to help me with my computer. On the way to my house He started feeling sick (something He ate didn't agree with him) and by the time He arrived i am sure He just wanted to go home. i tried to make Him as comfortable as possible and get Him anything that He thought might make Him feel better. my heart hurt to know Master was sick. We pretty much just held each other saturday and lay on the couch and watched the games on tv. We turned in early and held each other through the night. He again was up a couple times through the night tring hard not to disturb me and my sleep. By sunday morning He was feeling better and His appetite was starting to return. i made breakfast, we ate and He then worked on my computer. He had to leave for home shortly after that, it was truly an inspirational weekend for me.
i see alot of people, especially newbies posting questions about what the lifestyle is and i am sure i asked those same questions, i have learned, for me the lifestyle is not just about sex, or a Dom just shouting orders at you, its having a Master who truly cares about His property. He knows when physical needs need to be addressed, He knows when emotional needs need to be addressed. When a slave is taken care of so deeply she can only desire to serve the Master. Yes Master, where you lead i will follow.
There are just so many horror stories on here about fakes and want a be's, i just wanted to post something good and i hope this inspires people to not give up and dont settle for less than what you are worth. My question: M/s relationship, is it just sex or something more?
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/11/2009 9:58:45 PM   
bluefireeyez


Posts: 119
Joined: 12/15/2008
Status: offline
It is awesome that you were able to experience that with your Master.

i believe that M/s relationships are something more. Sex is sex and while it has a very different dynamic in a M/s relationship, it can't make you feel better when you're sad/sick. (Although it might put a smile on your face for awhile). Master makes sure to know where i am at emotionally and physically. If i am upset, He allows me time to work through my emotions and then when i'm ready He will be there to talk to me. i couldn't be with someone who's answer to everything was to have sex.

(in reply to hallieB)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/11/2009 10:33:04 PM   
SimplyIsaac


Posts: 376
Joined: 12/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: hallieB

i see alot of people, especially newbies posting questions about what the lifestyle is and i am sure i asked those same questions, i have learned, for me the lifestyle is not just about sex, or a Dom just shouting orders at you, its having a Master who truly cares about His property. He knows when physical needs need to be addressed, He knows when emotional needs need to be addressed. When a slave is taken care of so deeply she can only desire to serve the Master.


This was the golden part of your post. You summed up the fine balance of good stewardship needed in a master. I'd like to add one small thing to the qualities you mention: he is not a pushover, is confident in his authority and will not allow it to be subverted. I'm sure you'll agree your master has these qualities, too.

And just about sex? Not by a long shot. If the bigger head isn't involved on all levels there is no master to be found.



(in reply to hallieB)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/12/2009 7:53:31 AM   
fragilepieces


Posts: 416
Joined: 7/6/2008
Status: offline
I seldom post but---after nearly 20 years in the lifestyle, I'd have to say that what is described is just a good relationship period! I'd do all of this for a vanilla partner I was close to. It's just my submissive personality, although I no longer identify as a submissive.

I'd take care of any person I was close to in this manner---making sure they were comfortable, feeling badly because they were ill---damn I took care of my father when he was dying, and even held him and comforted him because I truly cared for the man and loved him.

The relationship you described does not have to be labeled as M/s to make it good. It can be just that way in a vanilla setting. Two people who truly care about each other do everything they can to make the other person happy. I guess what I am saying is it doesn't matter what you label the relationship, it's the dynamic of the two people involved that can make it good or bad. Lots of people label their relationship as M/s and the relationship is not so good, but I think it is not so good because of the dynamic between the two people. One person might be considered 'fake' by many but to one person they might be as real as they come simply because the dynamic works between them.

I believe that your relationship is something more because you as a couple have a chemistry that works for you. But it's not going to be that way for every couple, and it can be that way for even a vanilla couple.

(in reply to hallieB)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/12/2009 8:43:48 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline
For me... not for you and not for anyone else... if it isn't something more than sex, then it's just an elaborate form of topping/bottoming. By the way, congratulations on finding what sounds like a good and caring partner. That, in any stripe, is a wonderful thing to find.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to hallieB)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/12/2009 9:20:09 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

...My question: M/s relationship, is it just sex or something more?...


like any relationship, it depends upon the unique individuals that make up that relationship.
 
some folks don't want/are NOT wired for the conventional marriage structure (one man + one woman in an equal partnership) or romantic love (as opposed to lust or extreme compatibility) as a foundation for their relationship~and it doesn't necessarily make them fakes or wannabes because they enjoy an alternatively based form of relationship.
 
this slave doesn't see the M/s foundation structure as inherently deeper/more caring/more loving or shallow/ uncaring/unloving.
 
M/s is what you and your partner(s) make of it.

(in reply to hallieB)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/12/2009 9:29:22 PM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hallieB

i have been having issues with my computer and being a kind and generous Master He offered to help. He drove 150 miles one way to help me with my computer.



As an aside, have your Master research "Remote Desktop" software.  This will allow him to work on your computer remotely from his computer (as if he were sitting right there on your computer) in the event something else goes wrong and he can't make the 150 mile trip.

BTW, good to hear you two are happy.



_____________________________

It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to hallieB)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/13/2009 8:29:48 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline
M/s is more than just sex for us sure the sex is great and we enjoy it. Even if doing vanilla things we enjoy being with each other. Case in point about 2 years ago i had surgery was in the hospital 5 days Master came to visit me every day. When i got home from the hospital i could not do anything sexual for 4 weeks. Did Master stop coming to see me? No he was still here every day just to spend tme with me. If it was just the sex i would not have seen him for rhe 4 weeks i was recovering. We have a relationship that sex is part of the whole not the whole.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to MasterSlaveLA)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/13/2009 9:10:58 AM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: hallieB

hello E/everyone. i just had to post a short story about this weekend. i will try and keep it short.... Master came to see me this weekend, i have been having issues with my computer and being a kind and generous Master He offered to help. He drove 150 miles one way to help me with my computer. On the way to my house He started feeling sick (something He ate didn't agree with him) and by the time He arrived i am sure He just wanted to go home. i tried to make Him as comfortable as possible and get Him anything that He thought might make Him feel better. my heart hurt to know Master was sick. We pretty much just held each other saturday and lay on the couch and watched the games on tv. We turned in early and held each other through the night. He again was up a couple times through the night tring hard not to disturb me and my sleep. By sunday morning He was feeling better and His appetite was starting to return. i made breakfast, we ate and He then worked on my computer. He had to leave for home shortly after that, it was truly an inspirational weekend for me.
i see alot of people, especially newbies posting questions about what the lifestyle is and i am sure i asked those same questions, i have learned, for me the lifestyle is not just about sex, or a Dom just shouting orders at you, its having a Master who truly cares about His property. He knows when physical needs need to be addressed, He knows when emotional needs need to be addressed. When a slave is taken care of so deeply she can only desire to serve the Master. Yes Master, where you lead i will follow.
There are just so many horror stories on here about fakes and want a be's, i just wanted to post something good and i hope this inspires people to not give up and dont settle for less than what you are worth. My question: M/s relationship, is it just sex or something more?


The sex, the playtime, the toys, this is just icing on the cake. What it is, is simply the chemistry between the partners involved, that is what is truly important

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to hallieB)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/13/2009 6:20:01 PM   
hallieB


Posts: 63
Joined: 5/7/2008
Status: offline
littleone35, i am happy to hear your Master stuck by you through the whole 4 weeks of recovery.
i am happy for all who posted a reply with some positive feed back about their relationships. Best wishes to all of you on your journeys and may the sun always shine bright for you.....smiles.....hallieb.

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/13/2009 6:46:58 PM   
AnnaOfAramis


Posts: 523
Joined: 7/30/2008
Status: offline
Hi hallie,

People define M/s in different ways. For me, it isn't about someone giving orders and me *choosing* to obey. It isn't about whatever Master may or may not decide to do with me. It definitely isn't just about sex. For me, the process of becoming mastered is a response to the whole man- I become His because He fulfills what I need. His understanding of me, His protection and caring for me, His love for me- and the type of Man He is; if any of these were absent, I would not be mastered by such a man because there would be parts of me that remained in need, and therefore they would be out of His realm of control, if that makes sense (I'm not sure if I'm phrasing that right). Where I feel sex comes in is as an underlying driving force- my sexual instinct to submit to a man.

anna

(in reply to hallieB)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/13/2009 7:09:04 PM   
whis31


Posts: 143
Joined: 5/28/2007
Status: offline
i can relate, since Jan of this year i've had to have surgery and 2 set of biopsies. Master has been with me each time, he brings me home and sits until my 13 yr old comes home and can "take care of mom". Master even goes a step father; my 13 yr old has had a migraine headache since Oct 3rd, with one trip to ER and now today one to the physician’s office. Master has either called, texted or IM's me to see how my daughter is doing. This is more than her father has done. Master sees her as his since she is mine.

(in reply to AnnaOfAramis)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/16/2009 10:17:51 AM   
LPslittleclip


Posts: 1163
Joined: 9/29/2007
Status: offline
i did not start out to be in a M/s relationship i was only looking for someone to play with. but as those who have read what has happened since then i am now Her collared slave. i agree that it is like any relationship in that the party's must care and respect each other or it wont work. sex and play are just that the dynamic is on the rest of the time that is spent with and for each other even if it is time spent apart.

(in reply to whis31)
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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/16/2009 6:00:40 PM   
Zechriel


Posts: 308
Joined: 11/19/2007
Status: offline
Good evening!
Absolutely something more. Daddy and I cannot have sex, or should I say, we have not had it yet and we have been together for about 18 months. Maybe one day but that's when he's ready. Kink..not really cause there are times that I have nilla problems that he works out and I can always come over and make his phone calls or explain his finances to him.  Sometimes the best part is not the spankings, the blindfolds, etc etc but when we lay together on the couch, me holding him, watching tv. There are so many times when I feel it is not enough-that I should be doing more for him...or at least be undressed while doing it-lol...but he says, "it's not about you, it's about me and you are doing what I want right now." So if that means taking a nap or giving him a haircut or GULP listening to how the day's hunting trip went-that's what I do. Cause I love him.  Good luck!
Love,
Zechriel


_____________________________

Sir HighlanderME's little z

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RE: M/s relationship, sex or something more? - 10/16/2009 7:05:41 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

if it isn't something more than sex, then it's just an elaborate form of topping/bottoming.
 
quote:




Exactly, thank you.

There's nothing wrong with just wanting some kinky sex. If that's what floats your boat, great! But that's not my definition of M/s. Without the M/s dynamic pervading the relationship, its just a yummy sex game IMHO. 

To me, keeping the Owner/slave roles compartmentalized as just a sex thing would be like having a great big cake, and just licking the frosting. Sure, it'd be sweet. But if I don't eat any of the cake, I'll never be sated. Why waste the cake?



But to others, the bedroom D/s is the cake. They partake of it, and are sated. It suits their needs well. So that's lovely, for them.

YKINMK

_____________________________

Download SLAVE LOVER. Explicit BDSM porn, with a plot! A love story, on a FemDom planet! http://www.amazon.com/Slave-Lover-Chronicles-Book-ebook/dp/B0031ERBLI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1261973416&sr=1

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