A sign of respect

A sign of respect (Full Version)

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all4yourplsr -> A sign of respect (10/18/2009 9:19:12 AM)
Why is it that some Mistress DEMAND a sub call them Mistress right from the start and others bristle when they are called Mistress? i thought it was a sign of respect. all4yourplsr

SweetDommes -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 9:21:56 AM)
For some, it is. For others (like Holly and me) the title of "Mistress" is reserved for those that we own. For a random male to call us that out of the blue is presumptuous. The differences in preference are why we specify on our profile to not call us that.

allthatjaz -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 10:22:44 AM)
So your damned if you do and damned if you don't! I'd suggest you ask them how they prefer to be addressed. [;)]

DarkSteven -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 10:31:19 AM)
Because people are all different?

porcelaine -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 10:47:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: all4yourplsr Why is it that some Mistress DEMAND a sub call them Mistress right from the start and others bristle when they are called Mistress? i thought it was a sign of respect. if you're realistic about your comment it is unlikely this person would have any appeal if you encountered them face to face. people make demands all the time, but that is all they are. we decide if we'll abide and meet them or allow our feet to speak for us instead when we head in a different direction. as a rule i don't use the term. i never addressed my mentor in that fashion and i'd be hard pressed to do so with a stranger unless it was written correspondence or a directive my Owner gave. i have the same opinion regarding male honorifics as well. i have one Master, enough said. it is my belief that Ma'am would be more appropriate. it implies no attempt at familiarity and is a commonly accepted mode of address that may not ruffle feathers. be sure to read the profile in advance, it isn't uncommon for some to note their preference or ambivalence to such things. when this isn't present defer to what is less offensive. porcelaine

LadyHibiscus -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 10:55:23 AM)
Eeeeeeeeeee the dreaded Ma'am!! Now, me, I think that's a perfectly acceptable form of address, but I know many young women who would have a cow if you called them that! Somehow it implies great age... how that happened, I am not sure!

Lockit -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:08:39 AM)
Try going by their nickname and asking them right off the bat so they know you are at least trying. Many say what or what not to call them on their profile. If they don't address it and it matters a lot... and they get upset, they would be the one in error. For me... mistress is for that special someone in my life. Ma'am is good, Miss is fine, Ms is fine too. Lockit is good, after all that is what I use here. Mistress... makes me roll my eyes... but is a big clue that they didn't read my profile or are trying to piss me off. lol

homedespot -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:10:14 AM)
Since you wrote me and I corrected you (in the last hour) doesn't it make more sense to ask me? Of course not! But the answer is in my profile. I say don't do it. I am not your Mistress. I am jssubc's Mistress. I own him. It isn't a term of respect it is a term of possession (for me) and since you wrote me I corrected you. I also politely agreed to what you wanted and didn't get a thank you. SweetDommes got it right. jssubc says he is sympathetic though, because there are lots of protocols...he feels sorry for you and says he "understands your quandry". but it IS in my profile. ***ask jssubc about going to the female Domme who gets called "sir"!

LadyPact -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:15:38 AM)
It seems you got the answer from where it was intended. There are several reasons that a person might have the preference: They only use their title or scene name when dealing with those connected to BDSM. They may be a protocol person and prefer that all interactions are handled that way. They may be a person who lives a leather lifestyle and the term is in recognition of them earning their leathers.

porcelaine -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:29:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit Try going by their nickname excellent point. i sorely detest when people write me and say hello girl or hello slave. i hear an automatic click in my head. which means i've disconnected them from my screen. i suppose utilizing the name would stretch their brain a tad much. [;)] porcelaine

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:40:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: porcelaine quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit Try going by their nickname excellent point. i sorely detest when people write me and say hello girl or hello slave. i hear an automatic click in my head. which means i've disconnected them from my screen. i suppose utilizing the name would stretch their brain a tad much. [;)] porcelaine My theory on that is that it's very difficult, if not impossible to send one message to 1000 subs/slaves if they use a name...[;)]

DrkJourney -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:46:05 AM)
um...because we are not cookie cutter Dommes? Because we are people and all people are different?

porcelaine -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:46:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth My theory on that is that it's very difficult, if not impossible to send one message to 1000 subs/slaves if they use a name...[;)] that might be why i don't feel bad when i correct the oversight. [;)] porcelaine

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:50:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: porcelaine quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth My theory on that is that it's very difficult, if not impossible to send one message to 1000 subs/slaves if they use a name...[;)] that might be why i don't feel bad when i correct the oversight. [;)] porcelaine Could be....it's probably the reason you don't hear from them again...

DrkJourney -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:53:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth quote: ORIGINAL: porcelaine quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth My theory on that is that it's very difficult, if not impossible to send one message to 1000 subs/slaves if they use a name...[;)] that might be why i don't feel bad when i correct the oversight. [;)] porcelaine Could be....it's probably the reason you don't hear from them again... Usually the spammers just send out thousands like you said, and they just delete what they perceive as negative and go toward the others. They couldn't care less, they don't even know who they sent to...lol I mean how many times do you get the exact same spam from the exact same person?....lol I've had some ask me to block them because they can't/won't keep a list of who they spam to....sad

Lockit -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:57:29 AM)
ROFL.... I had one respectfully ask me to block him so he didn't come back at me! He was respectful, I will give him that... but damn! lol It doesn't work much when they keep changing their profile and nickname!

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 11:58:02 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DrkJourney quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth quote: ORIGINAL: porcelaine quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth My theory on that is that it's very difficult, if not impossible to send one message to 1000 subs/slaves if they use a name...[;)] that might be why i don't feel bad when i correct the oversight. [;)] porcelaine Could be....it's probably the reason you don't hear from them again... Usually the spammers just send out thousands like you said, and they just delete what they perceive as negative and go toward the others. They couldn't care less, they don't even know who they sent to...lol I mean how many times do you get the exact same spam from the exact same person?....lol I've had some ask me to block them because they can't/won't keep a list of who they spam to....sad Actually I have had repeat spam admittedly more on FL where this one guy has sent me exactly the same message 6 times now [8\|]

DrkJourney -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 1:10:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit ROFL.... I had one respectfully ask me to block him so he didn't come back at me! He was respectful, I will give him that... but damn! lol It doesn't work much when they keep changing their profile and nickname! oh I hear ya about the weekend....next to the little darling's that email. I had one guy jump on me on one of the boards someone backed into my car yesterday in the store parking lot so today, I'm just going to stay home and hide....so I'm typing on the boards, looking at the game,and what happens....I hear this horrific noise...I run outside and someone has backed into the garage and run off....lol oh this weekend has "got" to be over soon....lol

DrkJourney -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 1:16:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth quote: ORIGINAL: DrkJourney quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth quote: ORIGINAL: porcelaine quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth My theory on that is that it's very difficult, if not impossible to send one message to 1000 subs/slaves if they use a name...[;)] that might be why i don't feel bad when i correct the oversight. [;)] porcelaine Could be....it's probably the reason you don't hear from them again... Usually the spammers just send out thousands like you said, and they just delete what they perceive as negative and go toward the others. They couldn't care less, they don't even know who they sent to...lol I mean how many times do you get the exact same spam from the exact same person?....lol I've had some ask me to block them because they can't/won't keep a list of who they spam to....sad Actually I have had repeat spam admittedly more on FL where this one guy has sent me exactly the same message 6 times now [8\|] can't think of a name off the top of my head but I'll bet ya he's hit me too....lol

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: A sign of respect (10/18/2009 1:18:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DrkJourney quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth quote: ORIGINAL: DrkJourney quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth quote: ORIGINAL: porcelaine quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth My theory on that is that it's very difficult, if not impossible to send one message to 1000 subs/slaves if they use a name...[;)] that might be why i don't feel bad when i correct the oversight. [;)] porcelaine Could be....it's probably the reason you don't hear from them again... Usually the spammers just send out thousands like you said, and they just delete what they perceive as negative and go toward the others. They couldn't care less, they don't even know who they sent to...lol I mean how many times do you get the exact same spam from the exact same person?....lol I've had some ask me to block them because they can't/won't keep a list of who they spam to....sad Actually I have had repeat spam admittedly more on FL where this one guy has sent me exactly the same message 6 times now [8\|] can't think of a name off the top of my head but I'll bet ya he's hit me too....lol His name is LongPaul............yes he is, I know because it's the only part of him I've ever seen [8\|]

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