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homedespot -> CMTB Burnout (10/18/2009 12:13:50 PM)
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A sub wrote and asked me a question starting with: "Mistress," I corrected him and answered his question.
He then posted a question to the boards on why some people get prickly when they are called Mistress...but it got me thinking about the larger question of CM typing burnout. (CMTB is similar to CBT but it hurts the dominant more than the submissive and it only happens to the hands). *grins*.
jssubc pointed out that there were about a million different protocols out there and that my response to this boy on the boards was a bit harsh and that got me thinking. I get so many messages each day. Some days 30 messages (17 in 4 hours today so far). And the fact is that I short-hand them.
No matter how nice the message is from a male Dom he gets a one line response. "I am not a submissive". Why? Because of the number of times I've had men write me who just assume that if they are persistent enough that I will submit. So all male dom's get swept into the assumption pile of people who have to prove they are worth talking to. Because if I spend equal time answering all of them I get CMBT.
No matter how nice the message is from a submissive, if they address me as "Mistress" they get ignored or at best corrected. Why? Because it says in my profile that they shouldn't do that. So if they do that they haven't read the profile...they get swept into the assumption pile of people who have to prove they are worth talking to. Because if I spend equal time answering all of them I get CMBT.
Same with people who say simply "hi", people who say only "you're hot", people you use u instead of you, people who list their requirements, people who tell me they want to be on cam, people who send me their email/phone/im, people who say only "i'm the right one", people who say a whole HOST of things...they get swept into the assumption pile of people who have to prove they are worth talking to. Because if I spend equal time answering all of them I get CMBT.
I just don't have the time or energy to deal with each message equally kindly. But I forget sometimes that there are a lot of real people who just have no idea how to start. People who are truly sincere but don't have a clue. I assume that people understand I am not infinitely patient, and that they know they aren't the only one writing me. And I have plenty of great messages to respond to which DO deserve my time.
Now jssubc does a good job of balancing me out on this. He points out that when he first approached me the NOW me probably would have dumped him too. So if you want to know why you aren't getting answers, why a dominant woman seems like such a bitch when you just had a question, why people don't see that you are really a decent guy...think of the CMBT.
No real reply needed. I'm just thinking out loud.
J.
*I'm a female dominant (obviously) so I am writing to male submissives. I get almost no mail from women so I don't know if this applies.
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