RE: Does any Mistresses knows Ingrid Bellemare ?

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RE: Does any Mistresses knows Ingrid Bellemare ? - 11/11/2009 4:35:37 AM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
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From: Austin, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MsMillgrove
You had this mutual trial period of postulance, so that you did know what you were getting into.

It's not that much diffrerent from the scenario described in the book.

If the book calls for this mutual trial period and potential for release, with some code of honor for the dominant also, I would be more supportive of it.

The convent is a good example. However, I expect it relies on an honor system to maintain the agreement. The examples I considered as I reflected on this matter were of joining the military or of entering a legal contract, which are even more binding. If one can be expected to honor those commitments, why cannot one be expected to honor a commitment to an Owner/property dynamic? Thus, I still wrestle with the idea. For now, I do not see the two to be identical concepts: the military and business contracts are generally fair and reasonable (which may vary from situation to situation in an O/p dynamic) and if they are not, one has options for recourse.

While I can imagine O/p dynamics I would support, there is no restriction on entry. DominantX who signed on CM two days ago could enter an O/p dynamic with SlaveY who joined CM one day ago where the O/p dynamic is not a good fit.

I agree with the point about what happens in case of tragedy, which again goes back to the point of whether there is a code of honor for dominants. I am curious if Bellemare speaks of any such code or issue of responsibility in her book.

quote:

Cloudboy:
But her views have a logical consistency, and if we are to believe her, have worked in her relationship very well. I don't think most women share Bellemar's seriousness and singlemindedness, which seem to be her drivers. She does not come off as a megalomaniac, reckless sadist, or cynical opportunist. I do think you could tag her as supremacist, especially within the confines of her M/S relationship.

I have not read her book and only an essay she wrote about her general philosophy. Thus, I rely on this essay and comments from others about her book.

I can understand the logic but that alone does not address the reservations I list. I cannot comment in an informed manner about her character but am unimpressed by the suggestion of blackmail, which she uses herself and blindly offers to others. I have questions about responsibility and ethics about this approach.

I agree with you that her approach emphasizes D/s at expense of all else, which might be fine for some but not for most.

quote:

It would take quite a Mistress to inspire such devotion from a slave over a long period of time. I think she would have to be "something special" to pull it off.

I support the devotion-earned-by-merit approach over the devotion-earned-by-blackmail approach ;-)

Cheers,

Sea

Cheers,

Sea

< Message edited by undergroundsea -- 11/11/2009 4:38:58 AM >

(in reply to MsMillgrove)

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RE: Does any Mistresses knows Ingrid Bellemare ? - 11/11/2009 8:26:45 AM

cloudboy

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Joined: 12/14/2005
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quote:

I support the devotion-earned-by-merit approach over the devotion-earned-by-blackmail approach ;-)

You're such a wimp.

Anyway, I guess what you are saying is that the Bellemare tools in the wrong hands are a recipe for disaster, and that subs and slaves don't always have the best judgment when it comes to making decisions of informed, rational consent. So, from two sides of the coin, "non consensual" slavery is a bad idea.

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RE: Does any Mistresses knows Ingrid Bellemare ? - 4/17/2010 9:15:18 PM

SlaveSubtoserve

Posts: 282
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I read her book and found it quite captivating in a certain sense.....the obvious key would be that the Domme would have to be honorable and ethical regardless of her other qualities.......She seems to emphasize the physical safety of the slave as a priority and does note that the slave would be released (paraphrased) if it became too ill to continue service......the other key of course would be a good match between the 2 parties for long run compatibility to inspire such service..........my guess also though with all the Internet stuff going on is that her blackmail method might fall under identity theft statutes in this country so.....

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RE: Does any Mistresses knows Ingrid Bellemare ? - 4/17/2010 9:59:14 PM

seekingOwnertoo

Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
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quote:

Ingrid Bellemare describe in Her book called Owning And Training A male slave.

One "lady" once tried this with me. She emailed me a book by this author. Don't know if it was the same work or another. But Her proposition is like this:

The "Mistress" has You strip and kneel in front of a video camera. You read, a pre prepared "confession" ...

That You are a gay, cock sucking nut ...

Then, if you try to leave, the "confession" can be posted on all the internet boards and gay sites in your town.

The thesis is ... you will be locked in for life, because you as a man, will be too shamed to have the posting occur.

And thus, you are locked in for life.

Do what i did on this ... run ... don't walk ... get as far away ... as fast as possible.

That is my two cents worth ....

(in reply to masoslavetoown)

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RE: Does any Mistresses knows Ingrid Bellemare ? - 4/18/2010 5:35:11 AM

LadyAngelika

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Joined: 7/4/2004
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I think I'm pretty much with everyone here agreeing this this sounds dangerous and way too extreme. But those are opinions and the OP and his future Domme have the right to their own. That said, there is one piece of advice so far that this crucial no matter you are getting involved in (the bold emphasis is mine):

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsMillgrove

Years ago a close friend of mine put herself into a cloistered convent where the rules included silence and no contact with "the world". YOu could not "leave" if it became too much for you, you could only peition for release which might be granted six months later. Tasks were menial. Obedience was total. Punishments were severe. Yes, before making this commitment, you did live there a year or so first, under the rules and then you could take vows. You had this mutual trial period of postulance, so that you did know what you were getting into.

Are you really going into this blind (a lot of people made that assumption but I didn't see you say this). If you knew this woman well, learned to trust her, knew that she had you best interest at heart and not be strictly utilitarian as vincentML wrote, then maybe you could make this work. But anything else seems like a stab in the dark.

If you in fact met her here on CM (that part isn't clear to me either), seekingOwnertoo is quite right in telling you to run. Scammers can be quite crafty.

But above and beyond everything, what is the most important question for me is, what is motivating you to sign your life away?

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

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