Termyn8or
Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
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All my life I have been suffering from I.S.P. a debilitating condition to say the least, but have now found a solution.
I.S.P. stands for Intermittent Spontaneous Priapism. Not to be confused with your Internet Service Provider, this acronym can spell trouble for some. I have been suffering from ISP perhaps since I was born.
(Priapism is an untimely erection or one of unwanted duration)
Remember when you stayed up late watching TV and your Mom wanted to pull the covers off you on the couch in the morning ?, you couldn't let that happen because you had a raging hardon. Remember putting the book in front of your pants at school, especially when girls were around ? How embarassing !
ISP affects millions of adults, all male. Sadly no research money is given to help males unless they are a minority, leaving the majority hopeless, until now.
Terminal Products Corporation (fiction) has teamed up with AL Enterprises (not that they know it) to bring you a new and innovative solution. With the CB3000 and a properly applied harness your troubles are over. Just think if your last ex wife didn't see the bulge in your pants. Could've saved thousands at the very least.
How life could have been if not for this malady.
With the combo harness properly installed, nobody knows if you're turned on except you (you really know). Whether suffering from the priapism at the moment or not, they won't even know you're wearing it.
I swear by it (damn shit piss fuck)
We are required to post the following notice:
The use of this product may result in a return of eyesight and sanity, and/or the hair falling off of the palms. In more severe cases it may reduce the incidence of STDs and unwanted pregnancy. May also result in a decrease in auto accidents.
Therefore we must advise you to use this product with care and in compliance with the instructions. Discontinue the use of this orthosis if :
1. Blood comes out.
2. You die.
3. You are a Woman.
Also we must note that if you wear the harness tight (as intended) you might experience a decrease in bladder capacity. If this happens may we recommend some Depends.
Testimonial:
It's great, now I can undress all the girls with my eyes, they never know. I'm never emabarassed by that bulge anymore. It's great !
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Dietary information:
Polycarbonate, polyurethane, brass, steel, chromium. Contains less than 2% of the following: Salt, seaweed, recycled tires, cashews and U-235.
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Contraindications:
People who are pregnant should not wear a chastity belt, especially a male chastity belt.
People who want to become pregnant should not wear anything.
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Place your order now. they're $400 but we send the boys out and they heist one and it's $50. Limited time only. (until they get busted)
Guanteed to keep you "in line".
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Chastity belt prescription - 
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