Orgasm Control

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Orgasm Control

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Orgasm Control

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Orgasm Control - 3/10/2006 11:25:07 AM

HardPhist

Posts: 5
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline

I am a straight Dom/Master and would like to ask how you "teach" their male slaves not to cum when the cock is being directly stimulated.

I have always had a quick cum reflex and over the past year it had really started to piss me off. There are many times when I want to punish my slave by ass fucking her deep and hard until she either begs me to stop or I decide to pull out and cum down her throat. Since she hates ass play this is a great punishment.

Unfortunaltly I get in there and usually in two or three good strokes I am done.... so I end up using a large dildo to do most of the punishment. Not near as much fun for me.

I have read all the "self help" stuff on how and where to put pressure on you cock to stop the orgasm relex, and I have used numbing gel to keep if from feeling too good, but I want to control it...

So I am looking for some help from the experts.

Thanks.

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Orgasm Control - 3/10/2006 11:36:11 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

You could imagine your wife walking in on you in the middle of it to distract yourself.

You said you've read all the books- what techniques have you actually tried?

For me what has worked best is to take it slow, and when you get close- just stop. When you have control again, start again slowly. When you get close- stop. To me it doesn't matter if you're stopping at every other stroke. The point is to train your body to go longer. You've got all the time in the world.

How often do you masturbate? Teaching yourself control through once or twice a day masturbations can be good practice. Or try it when you have sex with your wife.

Although I will post a good health note that you should be using a condom with anal sex and remove it before you do oral activities.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to HardPhist)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Orgasm Control - 3/10/2006 11:38:09 AM

MistressLorelei

Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

How about a cock ring? They make for a stronger, longer erection. Or, stop periodically without telling her what you are doing and squeeze your testicles briefly ... hard... then begin again. You could also try to use a condom for a while.. opt for the thicker ones that would allow less feeling.

Mentally is where you may find the greatest sucess... try to focus on the task at hand rather than the pleasure you are experiencing... and practice makes perfect.

Good luck.

(in reply to HardPhist)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Orgasm Control - 3/10/2006 11:46:59 AM

MistressLorelei

Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

Also...

Perhaps releasing earlier in the day prior to your activities will allow you to last longer.

Most anything can be accomplished if you re-wire your thinking about it. What works for Dommes with sub males and orgasm control is making sure they know the consequences if they do. Aside from a cute, little chastity device... it's all mental.

(in reply to HardPhist)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Orgasm Control - 3/10/2006 2:11:18 PM

DiannaVesta

Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline

Damn I hate it when that happens! (Cumming too soon)

Seriously, I saw the thread and jump in with interest because orgasm control and denial is one of my top favorite things. I know you are not looking for advice in this department but hope to gain insight into how we women control male orgasm.

I don’t think cock rings will do anything for control orgasm. They do look good and help keep an erection. If anything they may excite you more.

It really does take practice and mind control. I teach my subs a type of mediation that redirects the energy. This really is a very instructive process that keeps them excited and on edge for a long time. Maybe this is what you want but I think there is a simpler solution.

Try masturbating alone. When you feel yourself getting to the edge redirect your thoughts to something non-sexual or less sexual. Take a deep breath, let it pass a bit and then resume. Do this with steady breathing but deeply in & exhale. Practice doing this on and off until you are able to redirect your thoughts and better control things down there. When you are able to start, stop and resume 5-6 times after a few weeks you’ll notice that it does in fact get easier… lol- or is that harder???

You can also later use a Magic Wand Vibrator made by Hitachi. Turn it on and place it right on the underside where the nerves group together called the frenum (I think). Hold your penis against it. It might make you come at first but try and quickly stimulate yourself then stopping before you actually release. Do this on and off. The vibrator may or may not help to curb stimulation. I have used one for years but I still can orgasm without it…it just takes longer. I think that is the goal for you, right?

Good luck,

Dianna

_____________________________

(in reply to MistressLorelei)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Orgasm Control - 3/10/2006 6:13:05 PM

Nikolette

Posts: 488
Joined: 10/2/2004
Status: offline

I am going to try to convince myself that in reality you aren't actually punishing someone by traumatically penetrating them- because I have so many strong opinions on that topic. Instead I'll assume that you are either a middle aged guy struggling to keep it up with your partner or an adolecent all eager and over excited.

That said...

I agree with using different stimulation tactics, and condoms to help you stay longer.

I'd also advise reading books on tantric sex and learning how to have multiple male orgasms and how to control the muscles that deal with orgasm so you can stay hard. That is a long and complicated process I won't get into but these books should suggest some exercises on those topics.

Or- you could stop mid stroke and give her some probably well deserved oral sex until you call down a little.

I personally teach my slaves by forcing them often to stop for a moment before they get too close. The one that finds pain uncomfortable rather than exciting.. I bite so the pain distracts him from the pleasure (and maybe I am secretly hoping he developes a conditioned association between pain and pleasure) Perhaps you could try applying this by pinching yourself or focusing your thoughts on unpleasant things. Definitely you need to start releasing by yourself and practicing these techniques during masturbating, forcing yourself to stop right before orgasm.

Ultimately this is mind over orgasm and if you apply a good amount of control over your excitement you can control your physical reactions too.

_____________________________

"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." ---Mahatma Gandhi

(in reply to HardPhist)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Orgasm Control - 3/11/2006 6:19:01 AM

LindaLashes

Posts: 170
Joined: 10/28/2005
Status: offline

I read about a great excercise,, flex the muscle under the penis,, like when you pee and stop in the middle of it.. do this regularly,, about 50 times a day...
Ok, when you´re close to having an orgasm, completely relax that muscle and wait until you can keep going for another ascent :)
Before reading about this I had "accidentally" managed to do this three-four times. I ejaculated but didnt have and orgasm so I kept on going and had my "second" one.
After reading about the trick I have done it twice..

_____________________________

Smack me around and call me Suzy...

(in reply to HardPhist)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Orgasm Control - 3/13/2006 9:03:23 AM

HardPhist

Posts: 5
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline

Thanks to A/all for the responces and advice. I must admit that I was a bit sad that most of the time the answer was mind over matter. I guess I need to try harder to distract myself, I mean if making shoping list or replaying old episodes of Star Trek in your mind does't slow you down, then what will... LOL.

And to Nikolette, I am middle aged, but really don't have a problem keeping it UP. It's the direct constant stimulation of intercourse that normally gets me off too quickly for my own satisfaction. Yes I like to cum, but I like what leads upto it much much more. Even after I cum, I can stay hard for maybe 30 minutes, but at that point the harmones are spent and well its just not as much fun.... thanks for the advice, I like the idea of a trance state that makes the great sense.

(in reply to LindaLashes)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Orgasm Control - 3/15/2006 7:39:30 AM

DiannaVesta

Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HardPhist

Thanks to A/all for the responces and advice. I must admit that I was a bit sad that most of the time the answer was mind over matter. I guess I need to try harder to distract myself, I mean if making shoping list or replaying old episodes of Star Trek in your mind does't slow you down, then what will... LOL.

And to Nikolette, I am middle aged, but really don't have a problem keeping it UP. It's the direct constant stimulation of intercourse that normally gets me off too quickly for my own satisfaction. Yes I like to cum, but I like what leads upto it much much more. Even after I cum, I can stay hard for maybe 30 minutes, but at that point the harmones are spent and well its just not as much fun.... thanks for the advice, I like the idea of a trance state that makes the great sense.

Mind or matter or get pills. There was something I saw in an adult store over V-day. It was a little tiny package that has chinese writing all over it. I asked the girl and she said "Well, it makes the dick stay hard a long time." In a southern draw and where everyone could hear.

I am sure there are creams and things that will make it less sensative. I would try that before taking a pill.

Much luck.

DV

_____________________________

(in reply to HardPhist)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Orgasm Control - 3/15/2006 8:48:39 AM

incognitoinmass

Posts: 428
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: Massachusetts
Status: offline

When I was a younger man I used to try and distract myself by trying to remember the starting line up of the Red Sox. Also, I once had a partner who, in certain positions, just loved to pinch and twist my nipples. It may not have been her intention to slow things down but that was certainly the result. She also introduced me to the notion of pain can equal pleasure.