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Down in the Domme Dumps - 3/11/2006 9:19:30 PM

missnoir

Posts: 17
Joined: 1/20/2006
Status: offline

In the past three months, I have experienced the worst of the professional bdsm community. I am almost ready to call it quits.

If you are a domme, master, even a sub with suggestions for a better approach or new venues for exposure, please help!

I have been doing this for almost eight years. March 6 was my birthday and I spent it crying while packing up my apartment. I have never been so financially and emotionally spent.

I would be grateful for any input. New job opportunities, bdsm related or not would be a huge help. I do have a degree and excellent resume material.

Thanks for listening to me whine. I know there are still lots of good people out there. I just need to broaden my horizons

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RE: Down in the Domme Dumps - 3/11/2006 9:50:04 PM

shepkat

Posts: 8
Joined: 2/24/2006
From: Orlando, FL
Status: offline

Hi Sweetheart,
For one thing, where the hell is Useless, Texas? I lived in Houston and never heard of it. You need to redo your whole profile. You look too sweet on your profile. The outfit you had on is OK, you need a photo, looking up at you, a whip in your hand and an evil smile on your face:) As a pro, you gotta have a collection of toys, BDSM furniture, etc.

Marketing is everthing! I don't know where you are going, Orlando is a someplace you may want to consider. This is a dry spot for pros and lifestylers. Las Vegas is another one. Your poor arms will get tired torturing clients and collecting money.

If this is what you want to do, you have a big future ahead of you! There are alot of men looking for FemDommes out there, you have to be in the right location.
jeff

[Mod Note: email address deleted. Personal contact information is not allowed in forum posts]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 3/12/2006 12:44:37 AM >

(in reply to missnoir)

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RE: Down in the Domme Dumps - 3/11/2006 10:14:29 PM

FangsNfeet

Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

Hello Darlin,

shepkat brought up a good point. You put Euless, TX. Being that I live in Bedford, TX I know that I'm only a few miles from you. However, on my profile, I put Bedford/DFW. This way, everyone knows that I'm in the Dallas/Fort Worth area.

CM member CravinSpankin started up a nifty group connecting many Collar Me members together here in the DFW area. I don't think anyone would mind you being apart of the dfw power exchange group.

When you want to make a business out of being a Domme, you have to push hard like an independent Massage Therapist using business cards and such. On one of the HBO Real Sex episodes, one domme has her own van. She calls it the Domoville and picks clients up as they see her.

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(in reply to missnoir)

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RE: Down in the Domme Dumps - 3/11/2006 10:39:07 PM

OscarHargraves

Posts: 693
Joined: 8/9/2005
Status: offline

If you really want to change your career field I know a man up in Amarillo who is looking for help. You would need some backrgound in mechanics and be willing to work on airplanes, but he will train you.

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Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly ! !

(in reply to missnoir)

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RE: Down in the Domme Dumps - 3/12/2006 3:53:37 AM

Prunesquallor

Posts: 181
Joined: 10/12/2005
Status: offline

I am sorry that things are so tough for you at the moment. You imply in your posting more than just the lack of clients; there are many decent people in this community, but also many nasty ones. This is something you have to come to terms with, and deal with in your own way.

I agree partially with shepkat, but only partially. I think you should have at least one picture of yourself looking really domly, in a domly pose (as shepkat said, try switching the viewpoint from above you to below you). But as you point out in your profile, you are a switch, and in your domly role you enjoy a softer approach, presumably with the emphasis on control and nurturing rather than punishment. There is nothing wrong with this, but you must expect your client base to be smaller.

You might need to emphasise the strict Domina a little more in your profile. But as you say, you have been doing it for eight years, and if it hasn't worked out by now, it probably never will.

I wish you all the best, anyway. I know what it can be like - this is coming from someone who tried for a short period to be a used car salesman, and managed to lose a considerable amount of money at it. :)

Best of luck for the future, anyway.

(in reply to missnoir)

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RE: Down in the Domme Dumps - 3/12/2006 6:46:55 AM

TeeGO

Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline

Just a blip on the radar.

Your only 25. Life is just beginning for you. Your old enough to know there are many ups and downs. Flying high all the time might seem nice. But it's the down times that bring perspective and true knowledge.

So pull yourself up and come up with a fresh plan. A bright future awaits you, I can feel it!

(in reply to missnoir)

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RE: Down in the Domme Dumps - 3/12/2006 7:22:05 AM

LadyJulieAnn

Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline

Hi Missnoir,

I'm sorry to hear that your ProDomme career isn't going so well. Do you have a separate website to advertise your services? How do you advertise?

I think it's very possible to still maintain your own style and be successful, and I don't necessarily believe you need to promote yourself as a leather-clad, whip wielding Mistress, if that is not your style. You have to promote *a* style though. I would also agree that saying you can switch is not really helping you when advertising as a ProDomme, so you might want to leave that out of your professional profile.

You might also want to consider other options, like phone or online services.

I hope things get better for you,
Julie

(in reply to missnoir)

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Post #: 7