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proudsub -> RE: tting on Facesitting/farting? (9/12/2004 11:38:51 AM)
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From "Great Sexpectations" this week:
A very warm welcome from Carmen Sutra:
Well, folks, this certainly isn't your average "Dear Abby"
column. While we do indeed discuss relationship issues (after
all, sex and relationships (mostly) go hand-in-hand), you
will never read today's letter in a regular 'ole newspaper
column. Whether the incident below has ever happened to YOU,
we can all relate to embarrassing moments in the boudoir.
The question is how to overcome them. Have I peaked your
interest?
Today's Topic: Overcoming Embarrassing Moments During Sex
Dear Carmen,
I had the absolutely most embarrassing experience of my life
with my boyfriend of five months over the weekend. We were
in the middle of foreplay and he was going down on me when,
at the worst possible moment, I farted!!! While he was down
there!!! He kind of just laughed and kissed my legs instead,
then came up to kiss the rest of my body. It didn't seem to
bother him much, but I was seriously mortified and am now
nervous about letting him do that again. I couldn't even
enjoy the rest of the sex that day. I'm too embarrassed to
tell my friends because I don't want them to laugh. I
really don't know if I'll be able to stay together with him
because I'm so embarrassed. I think about it whenever I see
him now. Has this happened to anyone else? I'm 20, by the way.
--------
Although I abhor the word "normal" when discussing relation-
ship issues, this incident is a common occurrence. It might
never happen to this woman ever again, but the damage might
already be done. She might be too scared to ever try oral sex
again. There is so much going on in a body on any given day
that it's a miracle this doesn't happen more often! When you
consider what and how often we eat, our exercise schedules
(or lack thereof), soft drinks, chemicals in our food, etc.,
it's amazing that we aren't tootin' down the street, let
alone while our bodies are contorted in odd sexual positions.
Passing gas, queefing, etc., are natural bodily functions.
They happen. They are natural. There is nothing wrong with
any of these. I'm not suggesting you lift a leg up to get a
better position to pass gas in front of your honey, but if
it happens during sexual play, it's not a big deal. It
sounds like this woman's boyfriend handled the situation well.
He probably knew that staying around her anal and vaginal
area would make her more uncomfortable, but did not stop
foreplay altogether. He continued like it wasn't a big
deal. And it wasn't.
You might not like this answer, but the best way to deal
with embarrassment like this is with time and experience.
In time, the person will see that his/her partner truly did
not care about the accidental fart. In time, the person will
come to realize that oops! these things will happen occassion-
ally. And in time, the person will realize the relationship
doesn't need to end. In fact, look at it as a bonding
experience :)
In all seriousness, I completely understand this reader's
mortification. It WAS an embarrassing situation, but again,
it doesn't have to end the relationship. Have you experienced
a similar situation? Have YOU passed gas at an inopportune
moment? Or did your PARTNER let one go at a critical time
in your sexual routine? Share how you overcame the embarrass-
ment, and I will include some letters on Friday. I can't
wait to read and share your stories! As always, I remain...
Devotedly yours,
Carmen Sutra
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