RE: list of hard limits

RE: list of hard limits (Full Version)

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Viridana -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 1:54:42 PM)
Anything illegal is a hard limit as well as scat and genital jewellery. Other than that I'm pretty open to anything...

sexyred1 -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 2:14:11 PM)
My hard limit is when the very first thing someone writes to me is "sub, what are your hard limits?" So annoying. No hi, hello, introduction, just that question. It exists in a vacuum when you don't have anything else to go on. And I have been known to change my limits, other than the obvious ones that we all have.

DesFIP -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 2:39:36 PM)
There will always be something new that you never thought about until you hit it. Develop a latex allergy? That's a new hard limit. Develop chronic sinus problems with vertigo? Anything that aggrevates it is a new hard limit. Don't start with a list of no gos. Do start with what you have in common that you both want to explore. You should have enough that you both like that you could play once a week for years without exhausting it. If you don't, then you aren't sufficiently compatible.

kiwisub12 -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 3:33:50 PM)
My Sir and i never did have a list of hard limits - mainly because i didn't know enough to be able to make said list. He said he would never do anything to embarass me in front of my family, and so far that has worked well for us. [:)]

littlewonder -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 3:45:54 PM)
I don't really have any with Master. Instead we talk And then I leave the decisions up to him. He's a smart man so I trust him. He's never given me reason otherwise.

Elizabeth666 -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 6:48:12 PM)
I had a lengthy list when i first met Him. We went through a checklist and i marked off things that i said i would not do. About a month ago, we went through that list again and moved things from the "NO" column to the "Done" column. Some things were tried over time, Anal being one thing. As things progressed, more things i had said No to became things that happened. About 3 weeks ago, i asked Him if we could try pushing some of my limits. i wanted to see how far i could let myself go and to see if i could move past certain things. To say the least, it was a pretty intense scene, but now there are more things to move to the "Done" column now. Would i try these things again? Maybe one or two.

Rochsub2009 -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 8:24:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lapgirl just curious as to some of the things people have on their list of hard limits? i am sure there are so many more "no's" for me that i may not have thought about. i want to be able to submit my list and never worry that i should have added something additional.... so, what is a hard limit for you? It has been my experience that these lists change with time. The main thing that has helped me to change my list has been trust. As i have learned to trust my Domme, items have been removed from my list. As your relationship grows, you will probably find yourself accepting experiences that were originally on your list. Moreover, you'll probably even end up LIKING several items that were on your original list.. i'd suggest that you keep your list short rather than long. Let your Dom/Domme know the things that you are uncomfortable with, but don't put things on the "no" list unless you could NEVER accept trying them. My list consists of the following: -No children -No scat -No animals in my orifices (is that the proper plural form of "orifice"?) But other than that, with the right Domme, i am willing to expand my own boundaries.

sireninchains -> RE: list of hard limits (11/23/2009 11:28:46 PM)
I dont talk about limits with Daddy, I trust him to know me. If I am playing with someone else though its the usuals for the most part plus the following: no fluid bonding unless you've been tested recently no needles (i go into shock and faint-- you dont want that-- or maybe you do??) no permanent damage (including scars) no marks at all where i cant cover them for work no obedience training unless discussed previously (this one is only with new people)

DesFIP -> RE: list of hard limits (11/24/2009 4:54:01 AM)
Nothing that will cause physical or emotional distress, or damage to me or to the relationship. How it works out is that if the vertigo is acting up, I won't even hang my head off the bed but will find a different position should he want a bj. No duct tape on me. Panic attacks. No tying my head to a pole, panic attacks. No humiliation, causes me to lose trust in you and weakens the relationship. I'm heterosexual and monogamous. Try to force me to be otherwise and the relationship would blow up in your face and the other person will go away thinking very badly of you for starting it. No body mods.

CaringandReal -> RE: list of hard limits (11/24/2009 4:50:24 PM)
The way I've done it in the past (and am still trying to do it) is I find someone I can trust and let him or her determine the limits. I don't have a lot of aversions/phobias and that makes things easier.

VeeTee -> RE: list of hard limits (11/24/2009 7:59:30 PM)
religion...nope, not changing anything there for anyone. And, all those other common sense ones.

scattered -> RE: list of hard limits (11/24/2009 8:18:06 PM)
I think it would depend a lot on the other person involved. For example, if I knew they hadn't the first clue about how to use a knife, I would be very hesitant (and probably refuse) to do knifeplay with them, but knifeplay isn't something I would never consider doing at all. For some random person I just met, sex without some physical barrier method (condoms, dental dams) would be a hard limit because I don't want an STD. For a long-term monogamous partner, I would be fine with it. My list of hard limits regardless of who is involved would include scat, vomit, significant permanent damage (mental or physical, and to me or them or a third party), public sex, and (obviously) involving the underage.

Underumam -> RE: list of hard limits (11/24/2009 9:40:37 PM)
lol. Some of these replies are pretty good. I guess I don't too many and haven't really needed them. Some people probably need to be caged, beaten till they bleed, cut/branded and so on.....However, why would anyone really want to eat shit? I've always felt there are plenty of more "human" methods available when it comes to proving one's loyalty and devotion.

kasumi -> RE: list of hard limits (11/24/2009 11:04:29 PM)
I would like to say that most of the stuff I do comes down to "common sense" but that leaves it vague. If I think that something is so wrong that it should be "common sense" not to go along with it, that doesn't necessarily mean that someone else will feel the same way. I assumed recently that incest is a taboo subject and in the common sense category (especially since its against the rules on the forums) but it turns out some people are into the idea..... >.> So, what I would say instead is I won't participate in anything that causes permanent, severe harm (scars and piercings are excluded to some extent) or impede on the rights and/or free will of others. Yes, this means I'm not into kids, animals or dead people. In addition, I'd rather not mess with anything unhealthy - poisons and bodily waste products. Yet again, though, there are people that don't see some of these things as "unhealthy" so I find a flat list helpful so everyone knows exactly where everyone stands. And I am a unique individual, regardless of my submission to my master. Though he could get me to do things I would really rather not, I would find nothing wrong in letting him know the things I would absolutely not do. Without respecting those limits, the relationship would fail. Luckily, we share the same limits for the most part...

AlexandraLynch -> RE: list of hard limits (11/24/2009 11:29:54 PM)
As a top, I have my own hard limits. Men tend to be more "in your face" about their kinks than women are, IME, so I say right off, "I don't like crossdressing men, so I don't do it. I don't do any technique I don't feel I have enough experience in to do safely. I will not piss on you, shit on you, or do things that can get us arrested in public or make you lose your job. I want to hurt you, not damage you, and I want us both to live to a ripe old age, so we will be doing this safely, whether you want to or not." And it has worked out pretty well.

MsMillgrove -> RE: list of hard limits (11/24/2009 11:44:16 PM)
I don't think anyone "wants" to eat shit as in finding it a desirable nice thing to do. A fascination with eating it can stem from the idea that it is so vile, that's a kind of proof of total devotion to eat someone else's waste or a kind of test of physical-mental endurance. If you were not strong or atheletic...you might see shit eating as a way to prove yourself. It's taboo, forbidden, the lure of a high level of perversion. It's potentionally dangerous to your health. Yeah it's twisted but then a lot of kinks are. --------------------------- CYA disclaimer (pun intended) --- Scat is a hard limit for me, just in case the human toilet boys might get the wrong idea from the above. (in reply to Underumam)

MstrPBK -> RE: list of hard limits (11/24/2009 11:54:12 PM)
Yea I list my hard limits in my 3 page conventions document. But I also list my 'Will Do List' and my 'Maybe List' as well. slaves get a pretty good idea what I am in to by taking the time to read the document. MstrPBK St. Pual, MN USA

eyesopened -> RE: list of hard limits (11/25/2009 4:57:39 AM)
I don't have any activities on my hard limits list. I only have likely consequences. 1.) Nothing where the likely outcome could be the death of me or someone else. 2.) Nothing where the likely outcome could be a prison sentence for me or someone else. 3.) Nothing where the likely outcome could be permanent physical or psychological damage to me or someone else. For example, there are plenty of activities that would not cause any of the above consequences in one context but could in another context. A bj in the afternoon is heavenly. A bj in the afternoon in the McDonald's playspace is likely to produce a prison sentence.

starshineowned -> RE: list of hard limits (11/25/2009 5:43:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lapgirl just curious as to some of the things people have on their list of hard limits? i am sure there are so many more "no's" for me that i may not have thought about. i want to be able to submit my list and never worry that i should have added something additional.... so, what is a hard limit for you? Due to the type of dynamic we have..no limit list or suggestions of limits were given. Master sets the course and decides what we will or wont do..end. Now..if you ask would I have a melt down of grand proportion and turn into a pool of jello should Master for some extremely out of character reason poise a specific thing on me that some have already mentioned here..the answer is yes. I just can't fathom Master finding enjoyment there after from trying to communicate with or fuck a pool of jello. starshine

sunshinemiss -> RE: list of hard limits (11/25/2009 6:26:03 AM)
I have hard limits. They all end up to being two things - nothing that 1. will harm me physically or 2. hurt my spirit. I"m a bit of a delicate flower when I trust someone. shrug. It's true. I do have in my profile 'tickling'- I absolutely hate to be tickled. People have tried to break me of it, but it never works. It just makes things worse. I train myself to cut off the feeling in my body. I do this because more than once tickling has thrown me into a near asthma attack. I worry about my ability to breathe. That's not something I want to worry about when I'm getting all hanky spanky. Just as I don't hang out where there is a perfume that will throw me into an asthma attack, so too do I not want to be tickled. It's just prevention. And it's my fricking life you're messing with. I like to breathe. Little quirk of mine.

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