|
Termyn8or -> RE: Are we there yet ? (12/7/2009 8:29:46 PM)
|
Many people are indeed going to experience a very rude awakening.
Actually I might get a bit more than three months because I have a paid off house, but that doesn't mean all that much.
Your timing is impeccable though, in light of the fact that just yesterday I had a talk with my Mother and sinister about the poverty in which we lived when we were young. See now I have three roomies and they were arguing about who pays for what around here and like that. I got so disgusted I decided to go over Mom's. One threatens to get a job and get the fuck out. None of them have any idea how to argue effectively and they won't listen to reason.
Who buys what ? They buy the food, that's the deal. They got welfare for that and really for four people the food budget is over $600 a month not including anything from me. OK it's supposed to be for three people but I really don't eat that much.
The discussion at Mom's segued into a discussion of my Mother's childhood. After that I figure we were rich. At least usually we had something good on Sunday, she got rice and milk. The discussion there did not much to help me cope with this. They don't have the conception of not being able to afford meat.
Meantime Mom and sis and I discussed welfare. At one point Mom did get a check. She had been sick and unable to work. Cashed about three of those checks and when she informed them that she no longer needed it because she was back to work they almost couldn't believe it. Mind you this was over three decades ago. We joked "Think it's hard to get on welfare, just try to get off".
We were, as the rest of the family, taught not to ask for help. By the time we ask for something we have already tried to get it on our own. Or perhaps a stroke of bad luck. As a result I have a hard time asking for a cigarette. Our ilk has absolutely no sense of entitlement that is so rampant these days. There is more.
If I lost my job I would be forced to either take a shit job or start my own business. And one of my roomies now, would have been an employee of my company, and paid well. However he does not understand the proletariat concept of selling one's time. If you want someone to buy your time aka hiring you, you sell your time and make sure it stays valuable. This guy thinks it is prefectly fine to do a $500 job for the company and make twice that on side jobs for MY customer. Although friends for decades, he will never work for me and maybe it's better that way. How is he entitled to MY truck(s), MY materials and MY hard earned money spent on advertising ?
I don't give him the boot because over the years I have found that there are alot worse out there. This attitude that the world owes you something is a pandemic. It, like other things I find disgusting about humanity are so prevalent that most people are used to it.
To insist on perfection will lead into a very lonely, isolated life. But I am really getting tired of lowering my standards again and again. What happened ?
My neighbor, a nice Woman really, told me that the city would buy paint for me to paint my house. I flatly refused. To be nice I told her - which is true, that when this house gets painted it will either be with Benjamin Moore or Pratt & Lambert paint, not that overhyped low quality Sherwin Williams. But the fact of the matter is that I want nothing from them. They want too much information anyway, like on the very first line of an application : Name____________________. Putting my name there is asking for help, help which I really do not need.
Now I have a real dilemma. I have a severe cataract in my right eye, which used to be my good eye. Working, even driving is hell. Now that I have tweo sets of bills and one income, I might just have to ask because I simply can't afford the surgery. Mind you this is not going to a doctor for the treatment of a disease, it's more like 'fix this'. I've gone for ear infections, roids, that's about it. Never for a disease. If my body can't cure it I will die. But if I live I don't want to be deaf or blind.
Now to find the money if I can. I could sell my piano but I don't think that'll cover it. I have a bunch of machines in the basement I could sell, but I really don't want to. Should I just get over it and apply ? That is a very hard step for me to take. I am in the "class" of people who would rather give up some of their goodies and toys to regain good eyesight, rather than to burden the taxpayer yet further. I might not be part of the solution, but I certainly don't want to be part of the problem. It will require alot of justification and rationalization before I make such a move to ask for assistance. Right now I can see well enough that I still have fairly decent depth perception, and the pain from bright lights is, for the moment, tolerable.
But then these things are not known to just get better by themselves. Who knows what I might have to do in the months or years to come. Also the days of my employability in my field are numbered. This is not just because of me, it is also because of external factors. I might have to change my tune someday.
For now, I don't think my pride is false, and I intend to do whatever it takes to hold on to it. If that means taking a shit job so be it. But there is no way in hell I am going to a college or university to make half of what I make now.
Why do I usually have to look within my own family to find people of such mettle ? Sometimes I don't even measure up.
I imagine being across the pond you never saw the first episode of The Beverly Hillbillies.
Oilman : That slew of your's is full of oil.
Jed : I know that.
Oilman : Well my company would like to pump it out.
Jed : I'd like that too, I just can't afford to have it done.
Oilman : You wouldn't have to pay.
Jed : We don't take favors from strangers.
Of course that was a fictional comedy, but that exchange sticks in my mind. Everybody has a good laugh, but doesn't realize what it illustrates. It shows something that is waning in humanity I think, and that is pride. People now think that pride is generated by driving a fancy car or having a fancy house. Nothing could be farther from the truth, obviously.
I would take a shit job if that's all that's out there. But by that time, believe me something bad happened.
And I now warn the world. If I ever cross that line, watch out. Even ow, I am in the process of screwing the banks, but that is more like returning the favor. Once I get it done I'll share the details. But to cross the other line and take from others ? Once I do that it is over. My pride will be gone but my intelligence won't. I also know that you can steal more with a pen than with a gun. With the internet, travel time is just about nil. Who knows how long I could survive like that, but I would lose something that is irreplacable. Hint : It starts with the letter P.
If I ever go the low road, be sure that I will have exhausted every other option. I would be damn dangerous too. I know electronics, so it might be a matter of beating alarm systems or something like that, or even telling others how to do so.
My Dad forgot that ethic for a time and ran a chop shop. Years later he remembered. But I know the ways. The guy Orion shot the other day was totally stupid. As a burglar when confronted by a Citizen with a gun, you turn your back. You will see if they have the gonads to shoot you in the back, and you could still lose. That is the risk.
Maybe I actually refound my pride, because I have done a few things that were not very nice to say the least. It was long ago, but it is still a part of me, and part of what keeps me straight is the fact that I want no more guilt. Yes I got away with it. But today most people are not sorry for what they've done, they are sorry that they screwed up somewhere and got caught.
I don't know what else to say at this time, except that we all reap what we sow.
T
|
|
|
|
