Wondering... (Full Version)

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breatheasone -> Wondering... (12/9/2009 12:25:55 PM)

A profile popped up on my screen like they do when we log in here, and for some reason i flipped through the pictures on that profile. One of them was of the woman tied up(boobs bound, legs, arms, etc) her belly hung over the ropes, and her flesh also hung over the hip area slightly as well. i sat there and stared at her...and i knew thats what i must look like tied up. i kept staring....

i am at a loss as to how to proceed. i just don't think i have it in me to look like that in front of someone. The shame i feel is enormous, because it is MY FAULT i look like this....and i can't fathom how ANYONE could possibly get "turned on" by such a horrid looking body. Can't blame it on a horrible accident, nor can i blame an illness. i have lost weight, but not enough, and when i do lose the rest, i will look no LESS hideous then i do now, because i do not have the money to remove the hanging ugly skin. i will just simply weigh less.  i don't know how to get out of this hole...i know there must be a way.... perhaps its back to counseling, i'm not sure.
Disclaimer: yes i realize there was no question asked, i'm not even sure why i am posting this...i just know i need somebody to hear me....even if its in my mind.



mnottertail -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 12:27:28 PM)

my question, was she wearing fishnets or purples? cause that would end it for me, right there.

Ron




Justme696 -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 12:37:25 PM)

At op
Not all people like the thin girls. Your partner is happy with you not?
Are you unhappy all the times with your looks? Do you feel bad?
If not...then..go do soemthing nice.......and in a few hours it will be ok.

If it does bother..talk with your partner...and find a solution if possible.



Yesterday I saw a profile....with a nick close to "starveme"...a girl so thin as you see them in Africa. That is what is call scary.



favesclava -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 12:37:38 PM)

please follow the 101 reasons chubby girls are better thread
. i look at myself through His eyes, and i find the beauty i couldnt see with mine.



breatheasone -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 12:41:51 PM)

~~FR~~i also want to say...hindsight being 20/20 and all

....that this honest to God wasn't an attempt to get sympathy or anything...yes, i guess i am feeling a little sorry for myself but, i don't want this to look like a "fishing expedition" to make me "feel better"...i was truly just being brutally honest in my venting



devilishpixie -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 12:50:02 PM)

I often feel very insecure and NM has worked and cont. to work on how I see myself. He sees the beauty in me that I often don't see in myself so I totally understand how you feel. Even to this day there are times I feel fat and unattractive.



VirginPotty -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 12:51:55 PM)

That pic you saw was posted because that's the real beauty we don't see in magazines, movies or tv. Society believes woman have to be RAIL THIN to be attractive but I'm sure the one's who posted that pic wanted to show REAL BEAUTY, not someone we can see thru because they're paper thin.
Like Justme said, "HE"S happy with you, right"?
To quote faves....."See your beauty thru his eyes"



Level -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 3:56:19 PM)

Echoing the comments that there are people that find great beauty, and sexual attraction in all sorts of body types.

I do understand, it can be hard to accept our imperfections (or what we see as such), and I don't have an easy answer for that.



sunshinemiss -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:07:01 PM)

Candy,
POSE AS A NUDE MODEL FOR ARTISTS.

*Yes I know I'm shouting.  I want you to hear me above the crap in your head.  I know what it is to have the "overhang"... But when artists see my body, ohhh lord they salivate.  It is an amazing experience to be so absolutely adored by interesting, brilliant people.

It has changed my way of looking at my body (and the first time I saw my naked body in a smutty magazine... wellll... *sniff*  it was a proud moment.

sunshine de milo



frazzle -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:15:06 PM)

smiles sunny

not sure i could do that, but if i get naked in front of someone, theyd have to be blind to think i was going to be a string bean. If they dont like what they see, the door is over there.



sunshinemiss -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:19:11 PM)

frazzle, where did I say anything about them thinking she'd be a string bean.  In fact, my point is that they LOVE the bigger women. 



frazzle -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:26:02 PM)

Sorry sunny, wording by text doesnt work sometimes.

I accept my body and think us curvy people shouldnt try and hide.

I have met males who accept me as me, unfortunately, im not sure He does. He harps on about my health, im not exactly dying. And if im honest, he isnt exactly the i know what a health club is.

Now do i delete this?? dont think so, if i have to get fit, why sghouldnt he.

Rant over [:)]






CarrieO -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:26:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

Candy,
POSE AS A NUDE MODEL FOR ARTISTS.

Ohhhh, I agree with this 100%...a very empowering thing to do and something that will help you to see the beauty to be found in what some would call ordinary or even ugly. 

*Yes I know I'm shouting.  I want you to hear me above the crap in your head.  I know what it is to have the "overhang"... But when artists see my body, ohhh lord they salivate.  It is an amazing experience to be so absolutely adored by interesting, brilliant people.

Yep...they love and appreciate reality.  At least that's been my experience.


It has changed my way of looking at my body (and the first time I saw my naked body in a smutty magazine... wellll... *sniff*  it was a proud moment.

Photos...smutty magazine...who has copies???  As the president of your fan club, I should have a copy. 
 Just sayin'[;)] 

sunshine de milo


Candy...beauty really is in the eye of the beholder and I understand how difficult it can be to accept beauty when it comes in a different sort of wrapping than your used to. Or what society tells you is acceptable. 
I'd like to share a quote with you taken from Arianna Huffington's book "On Becoming Fearless...In Love, Work and Life"

"If power, according to Henry Kissinger, is the ultimate aphrodisiac for women, confidence is a great aphrodisiac for men. The French even have a phrase for it: jolie laide. Women described as jolie laide are not classically beautiful, but they radiate a kind of magnetism that goes beyond their specific features."
 
Jolie Laide....pretty ugly....beauty that comes from within, that's exciting.  It's what makes women who aren't classic beauties attractive to all they meet.  No one cares if they have "hangers"...their beauty doesn't rely on appearances alone.    



sunshinemiss -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:29:43 PM)

Hey Candy -
I sometimes look in the mirror and say "dang when'd I get so fricking fat?"  And then I go to the gym... or the fridge depending...

But seriously... artists.... love.... round.... bodies...



LinnaeaBorealis -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:32:28 PM)

I just wanna say that I love this thread.  I've been there a time or two my own self, OP.  I was very thin for most of my life & I thought that was what was attractive.  When I see nekkid pics of myself up on my knees with my belly hangin down, I wonder how anybody could find me attractive.  But most of the time, I just feel completely HAWT!!!!!



Level -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:42:05 PM)

Ruben was a lover of the full figured woman, and did many wonderful works of art with that in mind; you won't find admirers of his work in short supply.



sunshinemiss -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:42:46 PM)

*adorez Level*



Level -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 4:53:33 PM)

[;)] I'm glad to hear that, my friend.



breatheasone -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 5:46:08 PM)

i just can't get past how repulsive the fat, and blubber, and old faded stretch marks, the jiggling fat, tops of the thighs that stay together, when the rest of your legs are spread, having to have your fat moved for you so you can be fucked or tied up.....i just CAN'T convince myself THAT SHIT IS IN ANY WAY ATTRACTIVE!!!!!!!!

i HATE  Thomas Edison! Without him i could at least fuck in the dark with some momentary peace.



peachgirl -> RE: Wondering... (12/9/2009 5:52:16 PM)

I have those moments too...fact is, most women that have had children face the same insecurities, imo...and frankly, age and gravity certainly aren't our friends. 

I think guys have the same insecurities we do, they just don't talk about them much.  bigger tummies, man boobs, sagging asses, sagging balls, whatever.  I'm sure you wouldn't trade him for anyone else in the world, just like he wouldn't trade you.  



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