Need a hand finding some information! (Full Version)

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SlutAbuser -> Need a hand finding some information! (12/21/2009 9:25:44 PM)

Hi everyone,
I am interested in finding out some more information on training people to ascociate certain things (in this case anal sex) with pleasure.

I was trying to explain to a friend how myself and an ex went about it - she was never to orgasm unless she was being anally stimulated, over time she came to associate anal stimulation with orgasming and as such began to really love anal..

I have had a bit of a look on the net but cant really find much more information on this kind of play/training.

I would be really happy if someone could help me out.




MasterSlaveLA -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/21/2009 10:24:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SlutAbuser

I am interested in finding out some more information on training people to ascociate certain things (in this case anal sex) with pleasure.



Ummm.... LUBE?!!





Valyraen -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/21/2009 10:39:17 PM)

From a purely psychological perspective, what you're referring to is Pavlovian behavioral training - rewarding a certain action with something pleasurable, and over time gradually phasing out the pleasurable "reward" as the individual starts associating the action directly with pleasure. As for the realistic applications of it, how to go about it in this specific context... good question. You might try an Internet search for Pavlovian conditioning.




Valyraen -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/21/2009 10:56:00 PM)

That's the term, thank you! Can always tell I've been up for too long when the vocabulary gets unwieldy.

Edited based on Psychonaut's edit: Bah, now I know I'm tired. Not even sure what I'm sure on anymore.




LafayetteLady -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/21/2009 11:28:34 PM)

Wouldn't it just be easier to find someone who enjoys anal sex to begin with? From the sounds of your post, you seem to be looking for someone who doesn't want anything to do with it. Quite frankly, if you are doing it wrong with someone who is new to the activity you are likely to do more harm than good. If someone is new to anal sex, the "trick" is to go slowly at HER pace. For someone new to the activity, foreplay is your friend. The more aroused she is the more relaxed and the better things will go. As someone else already mentioned, a lot of lube is necessary as well.

As for the idea of a post hypnotic suggestion, hypnosis is not going to make someone do something they wouldn't want to do anyway. It also would potentially remove the all important consent for the activity. Going slowly and taking your time is a much better method of getting her to do what you want than trying to force the situation. There are quite a few here (myself included) that already enjoy the activity. If someone told me they were going to "train" me to find pleasure in anal sex, I would probably not be able to stop laughing long enough to tell them it wasn't necessary.

But really, if it is something she would like to do with you, then take your time. If you rush things by going to fast, too hard or not using enough lube, not only is that going to turn her off, but you could cause physical damage as well.




antipode -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 3:13:19 AM)

quote:

find much more information on this kind of play/training


First of all, crossposting is against the rules, even if you vary the words slightly. Secondly, I am in the mist a bit why you would need information about something you already know how to do?




Elizabeth666 -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 3:24:23 AM)

Speaking from a sub's point of view.

I totally agree with LafayetteLady. Besides finding someone who already enjoys it, trying it with a newbie can be tricky. Until I met Sir I hadn't had much anal experience. Being something He enjoys alot, He slowly worked me into it. Lots of foreplay, making sure I was properly turned on (which is a HUGE help) and lots of lube. Also, taking it nice and slow and finding the position that works best. If I'm not in a good position, it's very uncomfortbale and I don't enjoy it at all, in the right position, it's actually pretty good and I can really get into it. Take it slow and easy. Don't ruch it and as LafayetteLady said as well, go at the girl's pace.




CarrieO -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 3:31:31 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SlutAbuser

Hi everyone,
I am interested in finding out some more information on training people to ascociate certain things (in this case anal sex) with pleasure.

I was trying to explain to a friend how myself and an ex went about it - she was never to orgasm unless she was being anally stimulated, over time she came to associate anal stimulation with orgasming and as such began to really love anal..

I have had a bit of a look on the net but cant really find much more information on this kind of play/training.

I would be really happy if someone could help me out.



If you've done this in the past, why is it difficult to explain in the present?  If you're looking for a website to send a prospective partner or friend to in order to understand your process, why not simply discuss with this person how you went about it in the past.  I guess I'm just confused by the question and the bolded part above.




sunshinemiss -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 6:57:15 AM)

You posted this in General BDSM also.

Here  - look for Simply Michael's post:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2003799/mpage_1/key_Simply%252CMichael/tm.htm#2003854





LafayetteLady -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 11:29:23 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23

quote:

As for the idea of a post hypnotic suggestion, hypnosis is not going to make someone do something they wouldn't want to do anyway. It also would potentially remove the all important consent for the activity.


You do realize those two statement directly contradict each other, don't you?  You can't simultaneously recognize that hypnosis cannot make someone do something they do not want to do, and also claim that hypnosis removes consent.

It's true that hypnosis will not make someone do something they wouldn't do.  What most people fail to realize is that hypnosis allows direct communication with the subconscious, and the subconscious is far more open-minded than the conscious mind.  That's why you can take a person who would "never" cluck like a chicken and autosuggest they cock-a-doodle-doo.

If her subconscious desires to orgasm from anal sex -- and it's hard to imagine a subconscious that doesn't want to! -- then that can easily be achieved with hypnosis.  I've made women orgasm from a light touch on the arm, so I'm 99.9% positive I could implant an "analgasm" suggestion in any induceable woman.   Relatively speaking, that's child's play.




Actually, the term "potentially" keeps it from being a contradiction. Someone can very much want to learn how to do something...and unless you personally are receiving anal sex, don't make the assumption that everyone wants to...but not be ready to do so. Therefore, while a post hypnotic suggestion COULD do it, they aren't ready to do so and therefore it lacks consent. Furthermore, when I talk about lack of consent, I am ALWAYS talking within the legal sense of the term and how it could play out should someone feel they have been violated by such activity.

Most people here are intelligent enough to know the theories of hypnosis. Regardless of that, unless someone is receiving an object up their ass, they can only theorize on how to make it work, and opine on what has worked for them with their partner. Just because you have an asshole doesn't mean that you have any clue on the subject. This is one area where in the interest of physical safety, the one receiving the object in the ass needs to have the majority of the say on the pace of moving forward.




mnottertail -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 11:32:24 AM)

based upon the title of the thread and its complexity once inside, would it be inflammatory to proclaim you couldn't find your own ass with two hands and a flashlight?

Je pense,

Ron




WyldHrt -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 1:45:14 PM)

quote:

Here  - look for Simply Michael's post:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2003799/mpage_1/key_Simply%252CMichael/tm.htm#2003854

Sunny beat me to it [:D]




SailingBum -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 2:37:32 PM)

Actually if you were a "real dom"  words to the effect "  your gonna get it up the ole poop shoot and like it" should suffice.

Motown BadOne




LafayetteLady -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 8:23:45 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23

No, it doesn't.   If hypnosis cannot make a person do what they do not want to do, then there is no potential to force action without consent.  If there is a potential for the overriding of consent, then we cannot say that hypnosis cannot make a person do what they do not want to do.  Both cannot be true, there cannot be both the potential to override consent and the impossibility of over-riding consent.  Something that is impossible cannot also be potentially true, otherwise it is not actually impossible.


Actually it does. Someone may have a desire to do something somewhere in their subconscious, but in the conscious NOW not want to have the particular experience at that time. YOU are the one saying that something is impossible, not me. I believe nearly all things are possible given the correct set of circumstances. We are not talking about someone clucking like a chicken at a party. Even in that circumstance, the clucker didn't consent to acting the fool. They merely accepted that it might occur. I seriously doubt that a person can receive a post hypnotic suggestion to achieve orgasm only by anal sex. The OP would like to teach someone to find anal sex pleasurable, using the hope that by allowing her to only achieve orgasm from anal penetration will cause that act to become associated with pleasure. The orgasm is nothing more than the result of the pleasurable act. Essentially, in this case it means that the person who is seeking to give the post hypnotic suggestion to their partner is too lazy to actually work towards making the act pleasurable to begin with. I don't care how deeply you want to hypnotize someone, it doesn't mean that they are going to suddenly enjoy someone ramming their penis into their ass.

quote:

Someone can very much want to learn how to do something...and unless you personally are receiving anal sex, don't make the assumption that everyone wants to...but not be ready to do so. Therefore, while a post hypnotic suggestion COULD do it, they aren't ready to do so and therefore it lacks consent.


What?  That made no sense.  I can't even follow what you are talking about.  I think perhaps you are arguing with a assertion you didn't bother to understand first.  The it in your statement that I highlighted, what does it refer to?  If you understood my point, then that "it" should refer to "orgasming from anal sex," but when one makes the substitution your comment doesn't appear to make a lick of sense.

Yes it makes complete sense. See above. Finding an act pleasurable is always going to be based on the act being done properly. If the act is done incorrectly, there will not be pleasure and no orgasm. Furthermore, one is not consenting to the activity, they are consenting to the hypnosis. Someone who is having issues with getting pleasure from anal sex is not likely going to fall prey to a hypnotic suggestion anyway.

quote:

Furthermore, when I talk about lack of consent, I am ALWAYS talking within the legal sense of the term and how it could play out should someone feel they have been violated by such activity.


quote:


What the fuck are you talking about?


Since you obviously do not understand the legal ramifications of such a thing, allow me to explain. If it were possible through post hypnotic suggestion to cause someone to find anal sex pleasurable (which again is the issue, not the orgam, but the act itself), and the guy then figures he can penetrate her anally with abandon because after all, she was hypnotized to think it feels good, after the act is complete, this girl is in pain and not in a good way. When she realizes what happened, she isn't going to feel all warm and fuzzy because some jerk gave her a post hypnotic suggestion and sodomized her. Where do you think that puts the guy in the eyes of the law? If you think he is in the clear, go ahead and try it and then tell a judge what happened. Then we could all look forward to seeing you listed as a sex offender for the rest of your life.


quote:

Most people here are intelligent enough to know the theories of hypnosis. Regardless of that, unless someone is receiving an object up their ass, they can only theorize on how to make it work, and opine on what has worked for them with their partner. Just because you have an asshole doesn't mean that you have any clue on the subject. This is one area where in the interest of physical safety, the one receiving the object in the ass needs to have the majority of the say on the pace of moving forward.


quote:


I really don't think you have any idea what this conversation is about.



Actually I think it is the other way around. The OP wants his girl to find anal sex a pleasurable. No where did he state that he even cared if she ever achieved orgasm from the act, rather he pointed out the method which he has used in the past in his attempts to make a previous partner find the act pleasurable.

Besides the ignorant statement that you believe EVERYONE subconsciously wants to orgasm from anal sex, completely disregarding that many don't even want to engage in the act, looking for a short cut to helping someone learn to find the act pleasurable is ridiculous and very unlikely to work.

So here is a suggestion, YOU have someone hypnotize you, as a straight male, and give you a post hypnotic suggestion that you will find anal sex so pleasurable, you will blow your load the instant an object enters your ass. Then after someone has used that object like a jack hammer in your ass (after all, subconsciously EVERYONE wants to enjoy it and orgasm from it), let me know how much you liked it when you are walking like you rode a horse for 16 hours.

Leave the suggestions on how to teach someone to enjoy anal sex to those who actually are on the receiving end or have some actual real time experience on the issue. Your theory, while it may be nice in a book, would never work with living breathing human beings.




CalifChick -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 9:56:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SlutAbuser

I am interested in finding out some more information on training people to ascociate certain things (in this case anal sex) with pleasure.



I can't get past this sentence.  If it's not pleasurable, you're not doing it right.  So instead of working on yourself to make it pleasurable, you're going to try to change her perception of it? 

Wow, gosh, I have all kinds of new respect for anyone who would do that.  How about instead of anal sex, you find a way to associate housework with pleasure.  Now THAT would be immensely useful.

Cali




LafayetteLady -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 10:38:32 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23


At no point is anyone having sex with anyone in a hypnotic state, and at no point is anyone having non-consensual sex.  

Idiot.



At what point did I say someone was having sex while being hypnotized? I have noticed that your own delusions of grandiur and lack of experience seem to make you believe you are an expert on everything while at the same time really not being half as knowledgeable as you even believe you are.

Try reading the post again. The OP isn't looking for his partner to have great orgasms from anal sex. He wants her to learn to associate it with pleasure. Orgasms, while pleasurable in themselves are never going to be achieved if the person isn't enjoying the activity to begin with. The person will not enjoy the activity if the person inserting his penis into her ass is not doing it right.

Your comment "I wish I found anal sex more enjoyable. Other women say they orgasm from anal sex, but I never do. Can you help me?" is not part of the OP's question.

Your statement is that of a typical ignorant stereotypical male who thinks that the orgasm is what makes the sex good. Orgasming from anal sex will never be possible if the anal sex isn't enjoyable to begin with. Do you think you can wrap your tiny mind around that fact?

I doubt it, because every post you have made since coming here has been nothing more than an effort to show everyone that you are far more knowledgeable about all things than everyone else while at the same time having admitted that the bulk of your experience has come from books. Narcissitics like you however will rarely realize their own ignorance and instead resort to calling others idiots like a child.




sweetsub1957 -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/22/2009 11:18:39 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SlutAbuser

Hi everyone,
I am interested in finding out some more information on training people to ascociate certain things (in this case anal sex) with pleasure.



quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

based upon the title of the thread and its complexity once inside, would it be inflammatory to proclaim you couldn't find your own ass with two hands and a flashlight?



[sm=rofl.gif]

quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23

If her subconscious desires to orgasm from anal sex -- and it's hard to imagine a subconscious that doesn't want to! -- then that can easily be achieved with hypnosis.



So if it's hard for You to imagine a subconscious that doesn't want to, is it safe to say that You'd like to orgasm from taking it up the ass???  I think it's a fair question.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: SlutAbuser

I am interested in finding out some more information on training people to ascociate certain things (in this case anal sex) with pleasure.



I can't get past this sentence.  If it's not pleasurable, you're not doing it right.  So instead of working on yourself to make it pleasurable, you're going to try to change her perception of it? 



Actually, she might never associate it with pleasure.  Not everyone does, even if the giver is "doing it right."  What if she's been sodomized brutally during a rape, or something like that?  That could make repeat performances of anal cause traumatic memories and PTSD flashbacks rather than pleasurable feelings, for instance.





LafayetteLady -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/23/2009 9:25:19 AM)

Thank you so much for making my point that you are indeed a narcissist who can't see beyond his own delusions. I'm sure in your mind that you have achieved many great things. You have an obsessive need to always be right and it is simply easier to give up than to continue having some narcissist who knows nothing continue to call me names. It is immature, uncalled for, undignified, and makes it quite clear that you are not someone worth knowing or worth listening to.

For the record though I will once again point out that pleasure does not equal orgasm for anyone who is evolved and especially for anyone who has a working concept of the female's physiology.




sweetsub1957 -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/23/2009 9:36:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23


quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957
So if it's hard for You to imagine a subconscious that doesn't want to, is it safe to say that You'd like to orgasm from taking it up the ass???  I think it's a fair question.


If I were going to take it up the ass, then yes, I would rather orgasm from it than not.  That's not exactly a hard choice.  But I would rather not take it up the ass at all, thank you very much.



haha  Okay.  Maybe some women would rather not either..............




Elizabeth666 -> RE: Need a hand finding some information! (12/23/2009 2:08:55 PM)

quote:

For the record though I will once again point out that pleasure does not equal orgasm for anyone who is evolved and especially for anyone who has a working concept of the female's physiology.


*Applauds*

I may enjoy anal once in a while but have never, will ever, orgasm from it. That I can say for sure




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