Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 7:49:25 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		Cali's a freaky girl?  Who knew?

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to ShaharThorne)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 8:58:29 AM   
MistressRosalyn


Posts: 908
Joined: 8/16/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyMondenschein

Another time, someone from an insurance agency called when I was staying with my mom. The sickly sweet voice of the woman on the other end asked for my father. (he'd been deceased five years). I told her I would take a message and asked what company she was calling from.. She told me and advised that it was urgent that she speak with him. I told her that he was not interested in what she was selling. So she replied, "well, I don't know that, DEAR> I haven't heard from him". I told her that if she'd wanted to hear from him, she should hold a seance because he's been dead for five years and proceeded to hang up on her audible gasp.
Happy New Year



When my father passed away, my mother left the phone under his name, because back then, having a woman's name in the phone book was like painting a big target on your back. (Incidentally, she left it under his name for about 12 years, then switched it to her name, and it's STILL in that name...but she hasn't lived in that house for over 30 years! Just shows how lazy my brother is!)

So if someone called for "Roland", we'd know that they were telemarketers...clever, eh? We'd usually say that he was not expected in, and could I help them...but one guy was REALLY insistent, and was trying to act like he knew "Roland" and that "Roland" would want to hear from him. Well, it had been a bad day, and I was getting a bit upset, so I finally told him, "Excuse me, but you're barking up a dead tree!" and I hung up.

Unbelievably, he had the nerve to call back! When he asked what I meant, I explained how long my dad had been gone (something like 7 years at that time), and he quietly said goodbye and hung up.

The nerve of some people!

And actually, I have to say that my brother leaves it in my mom's name for similar reasons, it sure clears out the telemarketers, but also, when her old friends pass away, their kids want to contact my mom and let her know...and her number is right there.

******************************
Merc, you are positively evil!...

I like that in a man!

Keep the stories coming folks! Reading them has reminded me of other classics that have long been lost in the cobweb covered corridors of this old brain. I used to have a memory, really I did, but it was lost somewhere in the fallout from the '70's.

Ahhhh! The '70's, when good brains went bad. 

(in reply to LadyMondenschein)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 9:45:08 AM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaharThorne

I get phone calls asking for Best Buy in Longview TX.  I am patient and give them the correct number (simple transposing of the numbers).  No complaints and the folks are glad that I remember the number for them to dial.


Oh you're so much nicer than I am, but that sort of wrong number for me usually happens in the middle of the night.  There is a cell phone company, Cricket Communications, that does alot of business in my area.  Their number is 1-800 and then their name.  My own cell phone number has the local area code, of course, and if you spell "cricket" incorrectly, you have my number.

So in the middle of the night I'll get calls on my cell phone, I answer "hello" and I get, "is this Cricket?".  Sigh.  Does this freakin' SOUND like Cricket?  Did I answer with the name Cricket??? So the person on the other end has both failed to dial 1-800, AND has spelled the name of the company incorrectly.

I used to try to tell them the error of their ways, but they would just argue with me.  Now I tell them, "Yes, it is, and if you call us again in the middle of the night we will be terminating your service", and I hang up. 

If I didn't have my number long before they entered the market here, I would change it.  It has been a while since I had one of those (watch, I'll jinx myself and get one tonight).

Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to ShaharThorne)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 9:52:37 AM   
VirginPotty


Posts: 11624
Joined: 7/16/2008
From: Virginville
Status: offline 		Maybe you should rub your hind legs together, Cali & let US be the judge of your, uh, cricket-ness

_____________________________

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 12:25:06 PM   
dreamofthemoon


Posts: 10666
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		Potty, being that one of my nicknames is Cricket, i uh, kinda resent that...

_____________________________

dreamy

40 Fluffy points
Hibbie Chick!
Pure's jello shot!
Charter Member: Lance's Fag Hags!
A good egg, per DRH

(in reply to VirginPotty)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 1:45:12 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		The walrus was cricket.

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to dreamofthemoon)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 3:52:20 PM   
MysticFireTopaz


Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
Status: offline 		When I lived in Los Angeles, I had the same 7-digit number as "Cinderella Cleaning Service" but a different area code.  I constantly got calls from people wanting me to go over and clean their house, garage, or place of business.

One time, a nasty woman left about five messages on my answering machine during the course of one day while I was away at work.  The last one was very indignant, saying "Well, if you are so unprofessional you don't return phone calls, then I don't want to do business with you."  Fine by me, I don't want to clean your house, either, LOL.

Finally, I resorted to leaving a message on my answering machine that if they were trying to reach the cleaning service, they dialed the wrong area code, and provided them with the correct one.  My friends and family thought my message was a little weird, but it worked.  The calls mainly seemed to come in on weekdays during the day when I wasn't even home anyway.

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 4:10:27 PM   
UniqueRaven


Posts: 1237
Joined: 9/30/2009
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline 		About 7 years ago, i got a new cell phone.  Shortly after i got it, i started receiving calls for Pat Green, the Country Music star - those of you from TX might have heard of him, he's a fairly big name Country star, on iTunes and everything.  i do like his music.

At first i thought it was just a mis-dial, but as i got more and more calls i realized i had his old cell phone number and apparently AT&T had recycled it to me - within just a few months after he had turned it in.  No biggie, whatever, until i started getting calls about his personal business, etc. - and then he had an accident down on the TX coast and i got a TON of calls for him - and nobody would believe me that i didn't know him, would get belligerent, etc.  People would claim to be his "best friend" - to which i replied, well, why didn't he give you his new cell number then?

i did contact Pat Green's manager about the personal calls and he sent me an autographed T-shirt.  Huh.  Well that was a reward, i guess, for trying to do the right thing, ha ha! 

Finally it wasn't fun anymore and i just gave up and got my number changed, and went through the process of changing it with all my friends, family, contacts. etc.  i realized i could have probably have had a lot more fun with this but didn't want to get sued for impersonation or something like that!  It was a crazy brush with fame, for sure.



< Message edited by UniqueRaven -- 12/31/2009 4:11:02 PM >

_____________________________

"My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure it out. What am I doing right?" ~Snoopy (Charles Schultz)

My blog is at http://takinghishand.wordpress.com

(in reply to MysticFireTopaz)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 4:18:11 PM   
dreamofthemoon


Posts: 10666
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

The walrus was cricket.

No, not that kind of cricket.  Do i look like a cell phone company to you, sunny?  

_____________________________

dreamy

40 Fluffy points
Hibbie Chick!
Pure's jello shot!
Charter Member: Lance's Fag Hags!
A good egg, per DRH

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 12/31/2009 4:43:26 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyMondenschein

When I used to baby sit back in the high school days, one of my charges used to like to look up women in the phone book, then call and say in a rather worried voice, "I don't know how to tell you this, but your husband got me pregnant".



This happened to me once, when my now ex-husband was a manager of a fast-food restaurant. One of his teenie-bopper employees called me and said, "I'm pregnant, and your husband is the father!" I apparently had a clear head that day, and turned on the concern...."Oh, you poor thing, how are you feeling??? You just call me when it's born and we'll adopt it, ok, honey???"

There was dead silence on the other end, and then she said, "Um....I think I have a wrong number." LOL

_____________________________

You know it's going to be a GOOD blow job when she puts a Breathe Right strip on first.

Pick-up artists and garbage men should trade names.

(in reply to LadyMondenschein)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 1/2/2010 5:49:45 PM   
MistressRosalyn


Posts: 908
Joined: 8/16/2009
Status: offline 		Sooo...once upon a time, I knew a couple who were famous for their parties. They would start sometime on a Friday evening, and people would stagger away sometime early Monday morning. When you got tired, you would just grab a blanket, clear part of the floor, and pass out, then hours later, wake up and start all over again.

So one party weekend I'm over there, and the phone rings. Allie answers it, then puts her hand over the mouth piece and tells us it's her obscene phone caller that she had been telling us about for weeks! Seems this guy called and asked for someone with her unusual last name, and as she tried to figure out which of her hubby's relatives he really wanted, he asked what type of shoes she was wearing. (She's a hippy, and was habitually barefooted!) They actually got talking, and since then, he had called her a number of times to just shoot the breeze. He always started off vanilla, and then after a while, he would go off into his fetishes.

So this particular night, she passed the phone around so we could all talk to him! He was a very articulate and intelligent fellow, truly enjoyable to talk to, and believe me, while I THOUGHT I knew a lot about sex and fetishes at the ripe old age of 18, he certainly opened my eyes. We kept in touch for a few years, until he finally kind of went around the bend when he lost his job and his home and ended up living in his car.

Hmmm...wonder whatever happened to him? He'd be about 70 now if he's still alive. 



(in reply to windchymes)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 1/2/2010 5:52:40 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamofthemoon

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

The walrus was cricket.

No, not that kind of cricket.  Do i look like a cell phone company to you, sunny?  


Did you know that krikket here uses my avatar?  Krikket is confused.

Are you confused my little alien walrus head?  *smooches


_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to dreamofthemoon)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 1/3/2010 8:16:46 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I am 46 - so my high school days were before all the 911 crap.

Anyhow- my best friend and I was always thinking up oddities.  His mom had been on the war path and did not relent.  So one night late- I phoned- very late. 

Ring RING!!

- Hellllllllllo?   

"you are going to die" (whispered)

what!  WHOOOOOOOOOOO is this?

CLICK


well she was up the whole night with her girlfriend trying to figure out who made the call. lol.  The next day I told my buddy and he burst out laughing.   at 16 EVERYTHING is a joke.

-- then there were grade school calls- we used to call Realtor and tell them we want to sell our house.  faking to be a neighbor.  This was in the 70s when EVERYONE was a realitor.  lol

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 1/3/2010 8:37:51 PM   
Cuffkinks


Posts: 1780
Joined: 5/5/2004
Status: offline 		Not obscene...but one of the funniest pranks ever!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CY12cNe2xf0

_____________________________

Resident "11"

"I love you, Sir. You make my heart sing and my panties wet. What more could a girl ask for?" - hejira92

"And that's why it's good to be...Me." - Gene $immons

(in reply to pahunkboy)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 1/4/2010 3:51:33 AM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

The walrus was cricket.


What about Paul?

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 1/4/2010 3:52:48 AM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: UniqueRaven

About 7 years ago, i got a new cell phone.  Shortly after i got it, i started receiving calls for Pat Green, the Country Music star - those of you from TX might have heard of him, he's a fairly big name Country star, on iTunes and everything.  i do like his music.


"Wave On Wave", great tune.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to UniqueRaven)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 1/4/2010 5:48:13 AM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline 		We used to tell telemarketers that dad was dead, we just had to hope that he didn't ask who it was on the phone when they could hear LOL I also had some crazy religious nuts convinced that my brother had run away from home when he was in the other room watching TV

We don't give out our home number, so if we get a call there, we know it's either rob's work, or an idiot. I did get some vulgar, offensive messages from some asshat in the next town over for awhile - finally, after a dozen or so calls telling me I was "playin'" the wrong guy, and that I was fucking someone (still haven't figure out who I was supposed to be fucking ...), I told him that I'd given him notice multiple times that he had the wrong number, that I had saved all of the voice and text messages that he sent me, and if I got a single one more, I'd report him to the police for harrassment. Haven't heard from him since.

_____________________________

Miss Karen and Miss Holly

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

Friends are God's apology for relatives

(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever - 1/4/2010 6:40:57 AM   
HimNbabygirl


Posts: 645
Joined: 11/4/2009
From: Knoxville, TN and Somewhere, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cuffkinks

Not obscene...but one of the funniest pranks ever!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CY12cNe2xf0


this reminds me...i have to work tonight lol...i'm not a telemarketer...i am a telephone interviewer...main difference...i ask You a bunch of personal questions but don't try to sell you anything...this was hilarious though!!!

as for the obscene calls...i used to order the pizza's for the hated teachers as well as the refridgerator running gag. my favorite to this date though is actually a call i made at work. i introduced myself and explained why i was calling and the length of the survey (this was about a 40 minute survey) the guy asked what was in it for him i said a think you. he said he would do the survey as long as i would be his Friday night date. i said sure (it was the end of the survey time frame and we were running out of valid numbers, we are willing to do just about anything at these points to get someone to do the surveys) anyways i pull out my "sex kitten" voice and go to work trying to keep him on the line long enough to finish the survey. about half way through the survey i hear a woman's voice in the back ground asking him what the hell he was doing and who was he talking to. he told her to shut up he was on a Friday night date. he then told me to go ahead and ignore his wife. i told him i would ignore his wife if he didn't tell my husband. lol he not only finished the survey but told me to call him back anytime.

then i had another survey where i was typing in an answer to an open ended question. while i was typing the guy started talking to his friends. this particular survey had about 4 or 5 open ended questions in a row. durring one of the times of "silence" while i was typing he was telling his friends about this girl he had picked up at a bar the night before and how she spent the night. i remember him saying "man you shoulda seen this chick" in an excited voice. i responded with "well was still pretty the next morning?" he responded with "oh shit you weren't suposed to hear that"


His baby girl
member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's
10 fluffy points

(in reply to Cuffkinks)
Profile   Post #: 38
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2]
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> RE: The Best Obscene Phone Calls Ever Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109