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men and a TS - 3/20/2006 12:16:29 PM   
JamieTS


Posts: 5
Joined: 2/6/2006
Status: offline 		why is it that men think that because you are now becoming a woman that you need to be with men only...  I find that the women I have been with were very understanding and taught me alot about myself and what I need to understand about what it will be like being a woman..  Men just don't understand!

< Message edited by JamieTS -- 3/20/2006 12:20:32 PM >
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RE: men and a TS - 3/20/2006 12:35:10 PM   
TheShadows


Posts: 403
Joined: 9/16/2004
From: Southern Illinois
Status: offline 		First of all, welcome to CM!

Second of all, why worry about what these men think you should or shouldn't do, or who you should or shouldn't be?

I say, be and do what makes you feel good, and ta hell with the rest.  Best of luck to you.



_____________________________

"The reason the mainstream is thought of as a stream is because of it's shallowness." - George Carlin

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most..." - Ozzy Osbourne

(in reply to JamieTS)
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RE: men and a TS - 3/20/2006 1:03:10 PM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JamieTS

why is it that men think that because you are now becoming a woman that you need to be with men only...  I find that the women I have been with were very understanding and taught me alot about myself and what I need to understand about what it will be like being a woman..  Men just don't understand!


it seems to me pairing is a natural progression for a relationship.  i suppose you could learn something different from each gender.  there is no right or wrong, just what is right for "you"


_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

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RE: men and a TS - 3/20/2006 4:21:10 PM   
subtlesubie


Posts: 138
Joined: 1/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JamieTS

Men just don't understand!


Why would they understand?

(in reply to JamieTS)
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RE: men and a TS - 3/20/2006 4:40:57 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		OMG you are gorgeous! Welcome to the boards and btw, patience---you will find an awesome man, but be cautious and stay safe.

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Mistress Hathor


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RE: men and a TS - 3/20/2006 5:06:59 PM   
openmindedslave


Posts: 470
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline 		selfishly, they are not thinking of you and your interest .In some small way they may be giving you a complement. ( okay very small) >Because they find you attractive , they are hoping you will  want to be with them as they want to  experience a ts.  Okay, we all know people on here , many dont read the profiles, ....they look at the pictures and contact you based on that.. Good luck on CM and I wish you the best

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RE: men and a TS - 3/20/2006 9:45:28 PM   
tasha_tart


Posts: 385
Joined: 2/20/2004
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JamieTS

why is it that men think that because you are now becoming a woman that you need to be with men only...  I find that the women I have been with were very understanding and taught me alot about myself and what I need to understand about what it will be like being a woman..  Men just don't understand!

 
Jamie, you answered your own question.
 
A significant portion of the population does not understand trans folk at all, and a goodly chunk of them don't want to understand.  They just apply their own preconceptions, misconceptions, and prejudices and act on them.
 
Of course, as you read the forums here I think you'll find that this lack of understanding is not confined to your situation.  There is no shortage of uninformed, narrow-minded people who expect the world and the people in it to fit the pigeon holes they've established.
 
Best thing to do is ignore them as needed, and hang in for the ones that do understand.  They are out there.
 
Good luck in your search.
 
Tasha

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RE: men and a TS - 3/20/2006 11:29:21 PM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tasha_tart

quote:

ORIGINAL: JamieTS

why is it that men think that because you are now becoming a woman that you need to be with men only...  I find that the women I have been with were very understanding and taught me alot about myself and what I need to understand about what it will be like being a woman..  Men just don't understand!

 
Jamie, you answered your own question.
 
A significant portion of the population does not understand trans folk at all, and a goodly chunk of them don't want to understand.  They just apply their own preconceptions, misconceptions, and prejudices and act on them.
 
Of course, as you read the forums here I think you'll find that this lack of understanding is not confined to your situation.  There is no shortage of uninformed, narrow-minded people who expect the world and the people in it to fit the pigeon holes they've established.
 
Best thing to do is ignore them as needed, and hang in for the ones that do understand.  They are out there.
 
Good luck in your search.
 
Tasha


All to often people do not even understand themselves much less anyone else regardless of persuasion.  If some guy or guys think that a "t" would or should be with a man isnt that simply nothing more than a matter of preference?  Isnt it also nothing more than a matter of preference if jamie wants to be with women?  i suppose its possible they really do not understand but then i suppose its also very possible they merely understand differently, rather than thru ignorance or malice.   i do not see anything inherently "wrong" with a guy thinking you should be going out with guys any more than you feeling that you should be going out with women.  Is that the impression you are trying to make that it is wrong thinking on their part?


_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

(in reply to tasha_tart)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: men and a TS - 3/21/2006 4:43:18 AM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

why is it that men think that because you are now becoming a woman that you need to be with men only... 


I would assume that the men you are speaking with are self absorbed fools... my Trans partner surely doesn't find a need to be with men<wink>

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MstrssPassion


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RE: men and a TS - 3/22/2006 3:21:08 PM   
southernsubboy


Posts: 41
Joined: 3/10/2006
Status: offline 		Id have to agree with TheShadows on this one, and that goes for everyone id think.

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RE: men and a TS - 3/22/2006 4:05:45 PM   
cloudboy


Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline
I am curious how much "guy" remains in you. In Transamerica, the soon to be TS said that her male genitals repulsed her. Did you feel the same way?

My Mistress also wondered why TS's seem to want to be more feminine that GG's (like herself.)

Laslty, although guys may not understand you, it seems you should certainly be able to understand them. That's a pretty good advantage in life.

(in reply to JamieTS)
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RE: men and a TS - 3/22/2006 4:56:55 PM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy


I am curious how much "guy" remains in you. In Transamerica, the soon to be TS said that her male genitals repulsed her. Did you feel the same way?

My Mistress also wondered why TS's seem to want to be more feminine that GG's (like herself.)

Laslty, although guys may not understand you, it seems you should certainly be able to understand them. That's a pretty good advantage in life.


Your response is obviously designed from a male perspective questioning another that you perceive as male... this is not the case.

Think outside of the box on this one. How can a woman understand a man? The M2F Trans does not necessarily understand men any more than a genetic woman would. They have merely had to exist in life with the shell that is male in its form when in their heart, mind & soul they are that target gender.

< Message edited by MstrssPassion -- 3/22/2006 4:59:38 PM >

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MstrssPassion


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RE: men and a TS - 3/22/2006 7:39:27 PM   
Smythe


Posts: 369
Joined: 12/31/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JamieTS

why is it that men think that because you are now becoming a woman that you need to be with men only... I find that the women I have been with were very understanding and taught me alot about myself and what I need to understand about what it will be like being a woman.. Men just don't understand!





jamie, a couple of things:

1. If you are passing as a woman and finding that people think you should be with a man, this is not trans-related but a simple bias toward heterosexuality.

2. Women will always understand more about anything than men.

3. I just wonder how complete of a separation we can make between body and soul. you have a female soul or spirit that probably felt trapped in a male body, and now you are becoming what you feel you have always truly been. But isn't your (or anybody's) soul/spirit/personality affected by 20-plus years of residing in a male body? Do you (and other trans-people) feel that you see the world from a completely female perspective?

This question is not a challenge in any way; it's truly a question about which I would love to hear your perspective.

Smythe




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Do not consider painful what is good for you.
Euripides

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RE: men and a TS - 3/22/2006 9:02:22 PM   
ShivaTS


Posts: 132
Joined: 2/4/2006
Status: offline 		I find because I am full time woman and am passible in everyday life, men treat me a "eye candy"  I look like a woman with something hidden beneth.  I am with my Dom.  He treats me well, but we are not sexual.  I think when I am ready, I may ask him if he would allow me to play with a Domme of his choosing.  Again nothing sexual at first.

(in reply to JamieTS)
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RE: men and a TS - 5/1/2006 3:34:57 PM   
MsRachelxxx


Posts: 31
Joined: 3/25/2006
Status: offline 		Think outside of the box on this one. How can a woman understand a man? The M2F Trans does not necessarily understand men any more than a genetic woman would. They have merely had to exist in life with the shell that is male in its form when in their heart, mind & soul they are that target gender.

< Message edited by MstrssPassion -- 3/22/2006 4:59:38 PM > [/quote]

Well spoken MstrssPassion, as a woman who was born with both sexes and yet whose parents chose to raise as a boy (until the age of 18 when i took things into my own hands, so to speak, LOL) and as a woman who has been deeply involved in GLBT issues, i always very much appreciate seeing someone, speaking out to what is so core to Trans people. Most trans people i have met have always identified as women and it is very evident in this day and age, with brain scans etc, that they are women who experienced the misfortune of chromosomal abnormality that did indeed put them in foreign bodies. It has also been my experience that by far the majority of Trans people are deeply nurturing, spiritual, loving and incredibly intelligent people. Hang in there Jamie.

(in reply to ShivaTS)
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RE: men and a TS - 5/2/2006 8:07:34 AM   
Sylph


Posts: 38
Joined: 8/26/2004
Status: offline 		Welcome to the boards Jamie. Also I would like to say TY to the other responders for making this a safe place for all pple.

In response to your question. This is a topic that I have discussed quite a bit with my partner. Sexual orientation and gender are two separate issues. If you are attracted to women, I am sure there are plenty who would love to have you. If you like guys as well, who am I to say- I do too: P

Now the response from other men that you are now a girl and should only be with men. Well there are a good number of fetishists. Unfortunately you will run across the "tranny chasers" as the partner refers to them with quite a bit of disgust. . We (the partner and I) have had many discussions about how trangenders and dommes are viewed as purely fantasy fetish objects by certain men, and the emotional ramifications of being treated as purely a fetish object.

Have fun, be safe, filter out the nastiness and have fun exploring.

Sylph

PS Feel free to drop a line to myself or the partner if you want to chat .

< Message edited by Sylph -- 5/2/2006 8:09:34 AM >

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RE: men and a TS - 5/2/2006 8:36:55 AM   
WeeIttyBitty


Posts: 115
Joined: 4/24/2006
Status: offline 		Frankly who cares? If someone doesnt "get" you, move on. Some people are unable or unwilling to try, why waste time trying to get them to understand you?

All you really need is the strength of character to be yourself.

(in reply to Sylph)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: men and a TS - 5/2/2006 11:55:34 AM   
openmindedslave


Posts: 470
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline 		I  think the assumption may be more igorance than  thinking of themselves. By that I mean , the general media sees it that a trans is beautful and fem to the outside world. That the desire to be  female in appearance must mean to some that there is a need to follow  the hetrosexual trail and you must be interested in the men more. In fact  some trans profiles clearly say they seek a Master or their bi.Not all.I have read many who seek a female dom to lead them further  down the path they desire.

This is just my view.I have always seen trans as the most abused persons in this lifestyle. You can be gay and visible in our society. Yes some will  dislike it but its far more acceptance than before. But to be an open about your life is still hard for so many. One I spoke to a few weeks back said he was robbed and attacked  by a would be dom and her  guy friends.When he reported to the police, they were not interested in getting involved . So many out here have to hide , even from their family and friends for fear of  not understanding  or worst...Igorance comes in so many forms..Sometimes its us guys who can't figure something out ...and sometimes its just the rest of the world....Good luck

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RE: men and a TS - 5/3/2006 1:09:20 AM   
Carriets


Posts: 5
Joined: 7/14/2004
Status: offline 		I think there are all types of people who don't understand, for me I am a Transsexual and have been asked by other TS's to date, I told them sorry I don't date TS's, and they got all huffy and said to me if I can't accept others then noone will ever accept me, which it had nothing the do with that it is just the fact I'm not attracted to other Transsexuals sexually.  Sexual preference is not the same as sexual identity.

(in reply to openmindedslave)
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RE: men and a TS - 5/3/2006 1:37:03 AM   
MsMacComb


Posts: 808
Joined: 3/30/2005
From: My Mothers womb.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Carriets
Sexual preference is not the same as sexual identity.
 

Therein lies the problem, especially with "John Q. Public". I seem to often attempt to explain that there is a unique set of circumstances that encompass TS, TG, Bi, Gay, and the various combinations in between. It seems like most "average" people are under the impression that anyone that fits the above criteria is gay, including all cuckolds, lol. Its like a one size fits all term, everyone thats not like them is gay.
Attraction is a very enigmatic thing. You can't define it, can't label it, most can't even explain it to themselves. It just "is".

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Not looking for anyone for anything, any time.

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