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Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 12:45:50 PM   
sodsta


Posts: 246
Joined: 7/19/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline 		An interesting thing I've noticed among all the geeks I've met over the years is that a very large percentage of them seem to be kinky in some way or another. At a lot of geek conventions you'll find things like bondage workshops, or talks on BDSM... lots of people walking around on the end of a leash and lots of rubber, corsets, cuffs and collars.

However, going the other way you find less of a cross-over. At least, I have. Most of the geeky people I meet are kinky, but not a lot of the kinky people I meet are geeky. If that makes sense?

To meet a kinky geek I find I generally have to meet them in a *geeky* setting, like a con or a fan meet-up, as opposed to a *kinky* setting, like a club or a munch.

So, taking all this into consideration, I wanted to ask if any of you had noticed something similar, and if so, why do you think there seems to be such a correlation between being a geek and being kinky?
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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 12:56:16 PM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		geeks are sexy cos they have great minds... imaginitive, problem solvers, designers, improvement buffs, they USE their minds towards kinky possibilities, which for me personally.... is soooo soooo sexy.
Im sure others have other thoughts:) just my 2c


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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 1:10:12 PM   
AquaticSub


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Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sodsta

So, taking all this into consideration, I wanted to ask if any of you had noticed something similar, and if so, why do you think there seems to be such a correlation between being a geek and being kinky?


Cause we're fucking awesome?

I could spout something about kinky geeks being drawn to comics because of all the well-drawn scenes of people in peril and tied up, the displays of power and control... but... eh. I think it's just one of those things like kinky and ren fair folk.

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 1:10:44 PM   
AQuietSimpleMan


Posts: 1410
Joined: 11/15/2009
Status: offline 		Well most of the Lifestyle people I know are Geeks to some degree.

I mean I know Masters who know more about the Marquis De Sade than I know about our current President.

I know collectors of paddles who have hundreds of them and can tell you about eash and every wood type and how dense it is.

I know subs who like to dress like kittens and are really into neko anime.

I know many Doms who get giddy when at any kind of lifestyle function like a comic geek at Comic Con!

The point is except for those who are really only in this for the possibility of seeing people naked I believe to some degree all of us are Geeks.

QSM

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 1:27:14 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		There's not..just seems like it because that's just who is usually more open about it because they're already open about their geekiness. They're the ones you'll find at anime conventions and everywhere online because they love computers.

But I've come across just as many conservative "vanilla" men who are into kink. Just takes a little more poking and prodding in the security and safety of a bedroom and a few drinks after a night at the bar to find out what they are.

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 1:35:30 PM   
Joseff


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Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline 		I'm betting that a lot more of the kinky people you're meeting are geekier than you suspect. It's easy to spot the kinkies at a geek event, but how do you tell the geeks at a kink event. Some might even argue that kinky is geeky.

Joseff


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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 1:37:11 PM   
LadyCimarron


Posts: 625
Joined: 12/29/2009
Status: offline 		I have been a geek my whole life. Some people say they find it hard to believe until I start rattling on about Star Trek conventions and my comic book collection (X-MEN!) I guess there are a lot of geeks in the lifestyle. I hadn't really thought of it before.  Maybe its just that geeks are so used to being the outcasts that we don't mind openly going against the grain. After all, what are people going to do, make fun of us?....Call us weirdos...been there, done that!

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 1:43:35 PM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		Oh I think there's definitely a higher propensity for kinkiness among geeks when compared to the average. The only two groups that seem to have (in my unscientific empirical experience) an even greater propensity to kinkiness are -

1) Anime enthusiasts (Holy crap I had a hell of a week staying at a hotel that was also hosting an anime convention)
2) Female players of stringed instruments, especially the Viola (Sweet sweet memories)



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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 5:26:00 PM   
Daddy519


Posts: 8
Joined: 12/27/2009
Status: offline 		I've noticed this too.
A friend asked me a few years ago why I thought so many Doms were computer geeks.   I think its about control.  I'm a bit of a control freak, I like to have it, I seek to take it when I don't have it (my boss noticed that I do this in meetings...when I'm not doodling).    The greatest thing for me about writing an application is that I am exerting control over the machine.
I digress.
Reading this it occurs to me that BDSM pervades almost everything geeky.  How many Sci Fi television episodes have you seen where some version of a collar appears?
Maybe that's me....

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 6:15:04 PM   
Underumam


Posts: 485
Joined: 12/18/2008
Status: offline 		Well, Saturday night the geeks come over for D&D, and towards the end of the night they start getting a bit frisky and asking D for some fire play, or violet wand fun. It probably be too long before they make it to the dungeon. lol.

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 6:23:12 PM   
ShaharThorne


Posts: 11071
Joined: 2/24/2009
From: Somewhere in TX
Status: offline 		I don't consider myself a geek until someone pointed out that I love comic books, role playing and having my mind stimulated.  Having a healthy set of breasts provided the perfect cover and I was able to meet my favorite artist (Linsner) at DragonCon one year (I still say the blue goddess is based on me).

< Message edited by ShaharThorne -- 1/3/2010 6:24:29 PM >

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 6:46:42 PM   
Drifa


Posts: 547
Joined: 7/27/2007
From: Rural Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23

Some of the things I've seen at science-fiction conventions:
  • Orgies involving 20+ people.
  • Slave auctions
  • Public sex
  • Fetish balls
  • BDSM gear in spades


Man, I am going to the WRONG conventions, lol. Or maybe not... I have seen people at some cons that I don't even want to imagine partially unclothed.

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 10:02:27 PM   
QuirkyAnne


Posts: 268
Joined: 9/17/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Joseff

I'm betting that a lot more of the kinky people you're meeting are geekier than you suspect. It's easy to spot the kinkies at a geek event, but how do you tell the geeks at a kink event. Some might even argue that kinky is geeky.

Joseff



Very well said!  At the first play party I attended, I spent most of the time in the social area, listening to different conversations and becoming acquainted and when asked what some of my interests were, I mentioned some geeky subjects I adore: science fiction, conventions, costuming, ren faires, etc as well as my mundane ones.  I then discovered that at least half the people in the room were geeky to some extent as well and the Dom hosting the party asked if I played RPGs and when I said yes, he informed me that many people he'd met had become involved in BDSM because of RPGs (Vampire the Masquerade especially since, apparently, there are a lot of BDSM elements to it? [not exactly sure, I avoid that game at all costs]).

Anne

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/3/2010 10:06:28 PM   
QuirkyAnne


Posts: 268
Joined: 9/17/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23


Yeah, well, let's just say that walking in on the orgy pretty much killed any desire I might have ever had to ever participate in one.  It was like a herd of elephant seals on a beach mating.

::shudders::



You know when you're laying down in a comfy position and then you laugh suddenly and because you weren't prepared for the sudden, gale force guffaw, you wind up feeling a muscle pulled in your abdomen?  Well, maybe you don't, but that's what your comment just did to me!

(btw, this story didn't have anything to do with the "Naked Room" at VisionCon around 2004 did it?)

Anne

< Message edited by QuirkyAnne -- 1/3/2010 10:07:34 PM >

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/4/2010 12:34:39 AM   
Darkfeather


Posts: 1142
Joined: 3/13/2007
Status: offline 		The point of this disscusion is, most of the geeky pursuits already stimulate that part of the brain akin to open-minded-ness and kink.  How many times has one walked into a bar in the orc lands and seduced a half-ogre huntress for information on the nearby dungeon (ok, probably just me, but hey I was a bard, hehe).  Role-playing, computer games, comics, etc... they all promote the alternative way of thinking.  To look at a woman with dog legs and not see a monster but a potential bed-mate.  And what young boy could not look at She-Hulk without some sort of "funny" feeling, green skin and all (gamma irradiatted boobs... sorry, I digress).  Point is, to see the kink, you have to see the world a bit skewed.  It's just the way the world works.   Being a geek, you already look at the world skewed, so the transition to kink is easy.  Now if I can just convince my GM to let me use that +4 Whip of Pain for something other than combat, mwhahah.

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/4/2010 5:02:56 AM   
PrimalConsonance


Posts: 463
Joined: 7/11/2009
From: Southern New Jersey
Status: offline 		(CNJDom says:)  I don't know about all of this stuff:  but once...at band camp...  No seriously, I grew up like this, and so for me it's natural.  Besides I still have all my Dungeons & Dragons (nothing past version 2) stuff just in case a game arises.  

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/4/2010 7:42:41 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		Its a good observation sodsta but not one I would entirely agree with.
I know quite a few geeks on the scene and they tend to be the more hardcore among us.
One of the best on scene rope masters I know is a total geek. Another geek is well known for running some edgy workshops and one on scene geek I certainly wouldn't feel entertained having Sunday lunch with is possibly one of the most depraved players I know. What I have noticed about the on scene geeks is they seem to be exhibitionists but then again the non exhibitionist geeks wouldn't stand out and be noticed so that is probably wrong too.

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/4/2010 7:46:08 AM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		*shrugs* Some of the munches I've gone to have sounded an awful lot like a computer user group meeting. I live in a pretty geeky area, though.

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/4/2010 7:58:33 AM   
LadyNTrainer


Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Joseff

I'm betting that a lot more of the kinky people you're meeting are geekier than you suspect. It's easy to spot the kinkies at a geek event, but how do you tell the geeks at a kink event.


Because when we're not playing, we're in the corner discussing the merits of the latest Linux distribution, or how to annoyingly min-max a D&D character in 4.0.  :)

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RE: Geeks are kinky... - 1/4/2010 9:34:09 AM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23

quote:

ORIGINAL: Drifa
quote:

ORIGINAL: Psychonaut23

Some of the things I've seen at science-fiction conventions:
  • Orgies involving 20+ people.
  • Slave auctions
  • Public sex
  • Fetish balls
  • BDSM gear in spades


Man, I am going to the WRONG conventions, lol. Or maybe not... I have seen people at some cons that I don't even want to imagine partially unclothed.


Yeah, well, let's just say that walking in on the orgy pretty much killed any desire I might have ever had to ever participate in one.  It was like a herd of elephant seals on a beach mating.

::shudders::



Ha! Not exactly Eyes Wide Shut is it? ;-) Sometimes fantasy is waaaaaay better than reality.

And to the OP, I've always been proud of my geeky side. I'm more a technology geek and I do read old school scifi, but not so much.

I think to be a geek you have to be curious and have imagination, as you do for WIITWD.

- LA

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