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incognitoinmass -> BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 8:56:16 AM)

I am relatively new to all this and am looking for a little direction.  What would you recommend as a good beginner's guide to BDSM?  I am interested in both philosophical enlightenment as well as kind of a 'How to..." guide. 

Any suggestions?

Thanks



Slipstreme -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 9:14:16 AM)

http://www.bcwsd.com/backroom/library/articles_us/safebooks.html

There is also Different Loving, which you may be able to find at your local Barnes and Noble, Borders or Books a Million.



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 9:16:21 AM)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_290256/mpage_1/key_links/tm.htm#290600

Link to 26 Discussions on Advice for Novices



BrianSenior -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 9:36:55 AM)

There is a book called SM 101 that has to do with Old Guard, that is interesting reading. Finding some local groups is also a great way to learn and experience.



MasterFireMaam -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 10:35:16 AM)

Ok, I'm hijacking the thread for a bit...Brian, I'm curious as to why you think that SM101 is Old Guard. Could you explain?

Fire



JohnWarren -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 10:50:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BrianSenior

There is a book called SM 101 that has to do with Old Guard, that is interesting reading. Finding some local groups is also a great way to learn and experience.


Jay isn't Old Guard.  For one thing, he's heterosexual.  For another, he finds a lot of that bullshit to be amusing.  That's why he's been using the handle Old Rope for years.



Real0ne -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 11:11:30 AM)

i would be surprised if you found anything out there that was very philisophical but there are lots of stories to be had.  one place i often give to people is the castle

welcome to the style, and good luck!






incognitoinmass -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 11:36:07 AM)

Thanks everyone, keep them coming!



BrianSenior -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 1:05:08 PM)

Indeed, SM 101 is not on Old Guard, it is a good book to read when begining, I said the wrong name. Not meaning to mislead, it was a mistake on a name of a book, thanks for corecting Me.



proudsub -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 2:59:22 PM)

If you do an internet search for BDSM 101 you will get a lot of sites listed.



ArtCatDom -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 3:05:48 PM)

*falls over*

You mean ... someone actually knows what Old Guard is??

*blinks* I thought every third person on the net was Old Guard .... at least according to a lot of websites I saw. [:D]

Sorry, I couldn't resist John. ;)

*meow*



JohnWarren -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 3:26:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ArtCatDom

*falls over*

You mean ... someone actually knows what Old Guard is??

*blinks* I thought every third person on the net was Old Guard .... at least according to a lot of websites I saw. [:D]

Sorry, I couldn't resist John. ;)

*meow*


Some of us have been around for a long time.  I actually had a chance to see the guys we call "Old Guard" at play when I was a beginning dom in Providence, RI.

There's a bit about it in the essay called Family Ties Keynote Speech on my website.



incognitoinmass -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 3:42:51 PM)

quote:

when I was a beginning dom in Providence, RI.



Do you miss the restaurants on Federal Hill?



MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 4:20:12 PM)

quote:


Indeed, SM 101 is not on Old Guard, it is a good book to read when begining, I said the wrong name. Not meaning to mislead, it was a mistake on a name of a book, thanks for corecting Me.


I'm curious - what book were you thinking of?



DeaconAegis -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 4:23:35 PM)

Will a movie count? If so, hunt around for a movie entitled, "The Story of O", I found it fascinating....



EvilGeoff -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/21/2006 9:44:31 PM)

One of the best primers for new folks into BDSM - Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns by Phillip Miller and Molly Devon
John Warren's own - The Loving Dominant  (John's probably too much of a gentleman to toot his own horn here...)
Jay Wiseman's SM 101 has already been mentioned.
Ties That Bind and SlaveCraft by Guy Baldwin...

You can find them and many more at the publishers http://www.mysticrose.com or http://www.greenerypress.com or http://www.daedaluspublishing.com

The list could go on but that should give you enough reading by real practitioners of the craft from both sides of the / to get you started.

Hope that helps!
- Geoff



redangel -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/22/2006 4:37:45 AM)

Yep, Jay is NOT old guard... just a loving absent minded professor with a lot of knowledge in that brain of his!!!

angel



redangel -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/22/2006 4:42:14 AM)

There is a lot out there. The best way to learn is look to local groups. Many have workshops on specific details, others have people who can mentor you... THAT DOES NOT MEAN HAVE SEX or ASK FOR SEX. Sorry needed to say that. A mentor can show you the ropes and help you navigate the lifestyle, helping you stay safe while you learn. They are NOT there to tell you what to do or not do, just advise. They are NOT called master/ mistress although Sir or Ma'am would be respectful, up to them though. If you aren't sure where a local group might be, you can type bdsm groups + (your area) into any search engine and read what's offered.
Good luck,
angel



JohnWarren -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/22/2006 5:27:01 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: redangel

Yep, Jay is NOT old guard... just a loving absent minded professor with a lot of knowledge in that brain of his!!!

angel

[laugh] Hey, I'm the professor.  He's the lawyer.



shygirldesires -> RE: BDSM for Dummies (3/22/2006 5:28:03 AM)

I am a blank slate.  I am what you want me to be.  I am without desire.  I am completed only by your desire.  I am nothing without the welts and bruises you give me.  I am without self esteem and will let you humiliate me in front of friends and strangers.  I am without self respect and will let you treat me like a toilet.  I am without sexual orientation and will service whomever you wish.  I am without ego and fear and will let your sadism prey upon me.   I am without shame and will do your housework.   I am without dignity and you may dress me up like a girl. 

I am none of these things.

i read your forum question and then this in your profile...... read Clauida Varrin's book Erotic Surrender.  Then decide what part of BDSM you want the D/s the BSM...i am a cumslutcockwhore and to find a Dom who dioes want to beat the shit out of me thinking i will cum with that and never use me as i desire to please them...its TOUGH.

female dommes are either arrogant, sadists or into extrme humiliation...cuase they hate men ....  i know...looking for a domme is as hard to find as a dom who allows me my Master's will in who i am...a cumslut

just my opinion...as i still seek out a domme or another subgirl who is "real" not just wanting to show her body off...cause that is how she gets off.

shycumslutDB



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