whats at the top

whats at the top (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive

Message

osf -> whats at the top (1/13/2010 5:33:32 PM)
what is at the top of your list for a dominant and whats at the bottom?

littlewonder -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 5:35:40 PM)
top: a dominant personality...not sure what your'e looking for...top of what kind of list? Bottom: likes the same music? I dunno..never thought about things at the bottom of a list..then again never really think of things at the bottom. I just go with the flow and if we connect then woohoo! I've struck gold since it's such a rare thing for me.

AquaticSub -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 5:37:36 PM)
I don't have a top beyond "a good match me". His having X quality could balence out him not having Y quality. For example, Valyraen isn't into historical reenacting or costuming. But because he doesn't care if I go off for a weekend without him to enjoy my interests, that he isn't into it doesn't bother me that much. However, if I were single and found an owner who was into these things as well and I could share that with him, that might balence out him not being a gamer. Which is something that Val is. It's the same thing with BDSM and style of dominance. Something I dislike can be balenced out by something I love and therefore I don't thin I can make a list, or an effective one at any rate.

DesFIP -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 5:42:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littlewonder Bottom: likes the same music? You don't mind never being allowed to listen to what you like? Never being able to pick a cd to listen to in the car, always having to listen to stuff you hate? Here it's higher ranked than that. It's something I really appreciate about The Man, that we share the same taste in music. That I don't have to rush and turn it off when he comes in. I stopped listening to music while married because he disliked what I liked. Rather than having to deal with his disapproval of the radio being set to a station he disliked and him having to change it, I gave up listening totally. However, I need a high level of compatibility across the board. Morals and ethics, views towards parenting, kink, libido needs, and so on.

winterrose77 -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 5:45:26 PM)
Top: An in-depth and accurate knowledge of me as both a sub and a person, including how to dominate me in such a way as to intensify our bond and keep me happy in my role as the sub. Bottom: The ability to do household chores without screwing them up if need be. :P

littlewonder -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 5:49:16 PM)
quote: You don't mind never being allowed to listen to what you like? Never being able to pick a cd to listen to in the car, always having to listen to stuff you hate? To be honest...no..but then again I don't really hate much music except rap and He doesn't listen to that either...otherwise it's just music. It's just a tv channel..whatever. It's not a big deal and it's not like I can't listen to my own music or watch my own tv shows. We're not together 24/7. Even if we lived together we would still have times when we're doing things separately. He likes to ski. I absolutely hate the cold. He goes off to enjoy it without me. I don't need to be compatible in every single thing in our lives. Just so long as we're compatible in our morals, values, ethics, views on life, sexuality and oh yeah...physical appeal.

juliaoceania -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 5:50:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf what is at the top of your list for a dominant and whats at the bottom? Top of the list is kindness... I love kindness in a dominant... Bottom of the list is someone who thinks it is all about him.

KatyLied -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 6:06:47 PM)
Julia.....waves......it has been, like forever

juliaoceania -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 6:11:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KatyLied Julia.....waves......it has been, like forever It has been too long katy!

KatyLied -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 6:12:16 PM)
Glad you are back! [:)]

Drifa -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 6:35:08 PM)
At the top of the dominant is a great head of gorgeous hair. At the bottom are some fabulous, well-shined jackboots. She really doesn't need anything in-between.

lucylucy -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 7:22:40 PM)
At the top: he must have a deep, passionate love for living life to its fullest. I couldn't be in a relationship with a curmudgeon. At the bottom: there are plenty of things I don't really care about . . . how he dresses, his musical taste (and yes, I have gotten completely used to turning off my music and never getting to choose the CD in the car and it's ok with me), which sports he's into, how he wears his hair . . . the list could go on.

alittleevil -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 7:37:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Drifa At the top of the dominant is a great head of gorgeous hair. At the bottom are some fabulous, well-shined jackboots. She really doesn't need anything in-between. Well this just made my lil, um...heart go pitty-pat! :-) In answer to the OP: At the top of the list is must be perceived by me as dominant. The bottom of the list would be any specific kink(s). Music is somewhere up near the top. Best, aj

chamberqueen -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 7:41:01 PM)
At the top is wisdom - not just knowledge or intelligence but the true wisdom to use them to bring out the best in a slave for his pleasure and her fulfillment. A good sense of humor is a close second. Honesty and integrity are also toprunners. He must be both a good listener and interpreter. If by bottom you mean the least important thing, I don't care his financial status. That means nothing to me. Everything I need is in his actions.

Rochsub2009 -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 10:03:03 PM)
At the top i'd have 2 things tied for first place: -A truly dominant personality (dominant in the vanilla world as well as in relationships) -A powerful imagination that allows Her to keep the relationship fresh and to continually find new ways to penetrate deeper into my psyche.. At the bottom i'd list selfishness. i've experienced Dommes who truly believe that it's all about them. The reality is that even in a D/s relationship, BOTH parties' needs must be met. If it's only about one person, then the other person will ultimately find the relationship unfulfilling and leave.

WinsomeDefiance -> RE: whats at the top (1/13/2010 10:10:26 PM)
Top of my list in admirable qualities I would look for an a dominant would be: The ability to connect with me, commit to us and control himself, as well as possessing a sense of humor and a generous nature. I dunno. Someone I could respect - in and out of the relationship. I don't have a bottom of the barrel option. If I ever have to dredge the bottom of the barrel for a companion, I'd just head to the animal shelter and rescue me a dog. I can always train a dog to commit to me and control himself. WinD

winterlight -> RE: whats at the top (1/14/2010 12:06:01 AM)
At the bottom.. 1. Not wanting me to send him a ticket to the U.S. where we will live happily ever after 2. Not wanting me to send money because (fill in the blank__________________) 3. Not wanting an instant sub 4. Not wanting me to pay for everything including his education, rent, etc. At the top: someone that has principles, scruples, is fun to be with, says what he means and means what he says, is polite, treats me well, romantic, likes to cook, likees to travel, is good to his family, loves to laugh and doesn't take himself seriously... the same things that i want to offer Him..

WyldHrt -> RE: whats at the top (1/14/2010 12:17:13 AM)
Good question, albeit not easy to answer. Aquatic nailed it overall with "a good match for me", but I would say that the first thing that catches my eye (that's top in a way, I guess) is self confidence. Not the brash, attention getting behaviour of a braggart, but the quiet control of one who doesn't need to make himself the center of attention in order to get what he wants. When this quality is combined with an awesome sense of humour, I'm pretty much hooked. [:)] On the low side, I couldn't care less what sports he likes to watch on TV (unless it is golf... there's something inherently wrong with watching golf on TV [8D]) waits to get banhammered by TV golf watching Doms [:D]

littlebitxxx -> RE: whats at the top (1/14/2010 1:06:17 AM)
Top: the "presence". Without that, there is nothing else to a Master worth getting to know. Bottom: which way He likes the toilet paper to come off the roll. one cares about everything in between at the same level because they are all His preference, even if they seem to have a different spot on the Importance list. If it didn't make the list, it's something one really doesn't care about enough as to give an opinion.

ranja -> RE: whats at the top (1/14/2010 2:09:41 AM)
Top: it is of paramount importance that he wants me very closely followed by that he must be able to make me cum then there is all the rest: handsome and rich with impeccable taste and all that and about at the bottom is that it would be nice if he is perfect

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.046875