Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Resistance


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Resistance Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Resistance - 1/14/2010 8:59:57 PM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WestBaySlave

On reading others posts, I suppose I might come across as resistant too, in the getting to know you stage i.e. not submissive initially, at least until there some trust and friendship between me and the man I'm getting to know. I don't really consider it deliberate resistance, though; merely caution. It takes me a while to fully trust a man. 

Exactly.  Caution is good, at least for me. 

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to WestBaySlave)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Resistance - 1/14/2010 9:23:21 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline 		I just got back to reading the replies everyone has given thus far. I don't want to clog up the thread thanking each one of you individually, but all of you have given me some insight into my question, and for that, thank you.

There seem to be many nuances to why someone may resist and many of them appear to stem from fear, or caution. FlamingRedhead mentioned that she didn't necessarily feel as if her resistance wash pushing the dom she was attracted to away, she did feel as though she was were holding herself back. Which leads me to ask, if you (the general you) feel as though you are holding yourself back by resisting, why do you resist?

itsmeinLV mentioned resisting when thinking the relationship wouldn't work. I can relate to that, sort of, but I'm curious why someone would then continue having intimate conversations with a person they didn't think would fit into their life (for whatever reason that was).

EFT

< Message edited by Domin8tingUrDrmz -- 1/14/2010 9:24:17 PM >

_____________________________

4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.

Ask a Mistress Forum FAQ
Profile Help

(in reply to sweetsub1957)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 2:33:29 AM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline 		Resistance is futile!!!


Sorry... had to do it.







Attachment (1)

_____________________________

It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to Domin8tingUrDrmz)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 2:42:13 PM   
masterlink65


Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline 		i know the type you mean, i find them very hard to work with and undesirable as a slave. 

(in reply to Domin8tingUrDrmz)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 2:59:33 PM   
BoundDragon


Posts: 265
Joined: 3/20/2007
Status: offline 		I must say it does seem to be in my nature to test the ropes so to speak.
I am a submissive no doubt and I do try my best to do as I am told.

As for resistance, when it comes to the physical stuff, especially the play or when he just wants to tweek my buttons I do put up a bit of a fight... no kicking or blocking though.
When he pulls me by the hair I strain forward, to feel the pull with some resistance heightens my senses. The heart races faster, pupils dilate and (for lack of a better way to put it) the juices are flowing faster hee hee.
If he grabs my hands I try to wiggle away a bit but never succeed to break away, its enforcing his strength. I feel so much more submissive as it asserts his dominance over me and reminds me there isnt a thing I can do about.

It dont chose to be like this, it is far more instinctual than that I think.
On the flip side if he ordered me to keep my hands above my head while he did something to me then it could have the same effect but with different emotions attatched... the need to please and the determination to succeed would drive me into a more submissive state too.

(in reply to masterlink65)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 3:34:38 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I wouldn't think the resistance is to be pursued more, but to get a certain distance from the chemistry so you can think more clearly if this relationship is right for you.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to mc1234)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 3:53:39 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz
If you are not the type of submissive who resists as I describe, why don't you resist?



Damn I thought this was going to be about resistence play...

I'm so not that type at all and I never have been. Resisting interest in someone is something that has never made sense for me. I tell them I'm interested and we go from there. If they aren't interested in anymore, than oh well. There are plenty more.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Domin8tingUrDrmz)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 3:54:33 PM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline 		in all cases, when im getting to know a person ill keep the brakes on (resist any urgent pushing from them) - primarily to be sure that my first, second or third impression is correct. so often in the early stages people are putting on their best front, wanting to impress, maybe a bit careful about what they say and how they say it. over a bit of time, as conversation flows openly and those initial 'introductory' chats turn into real discourse and go well i tend to then let the brakes off.

once the brakes are off though i then slip into tentative mode but only because i then start to look beyond the fun of just getting to know a complete stranger and begin to consider if i can deliver what they hope from me, based on the personality ive been talking to on the phone.

if by then everything feels right and plausible and realistic in terms of life, geography and the universe, ill agree to meet.

resistance beyond that point has been largely futile and i dont bother

generally its only in the early stages when i want to be completely sure that we are a match that i resist being rushed or pushed. usually theres a little voice in my head that says 'yes' or 'no' and im much better at listening to that little voice now and doing as it says.

_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to BoundDragon)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 4:49:29 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I wouldn't think the resistance is to be pursued more, but to get a certain distance from the chemistry so you can think more clearly if this relationship is right for you.


After re-reading my questions, it should have occured to me that this answer (and variations of this answer) was going to apply to many. It makes sense.

So, thank you for pointing out the obvious, it obviously eluded me.

_____________________________

4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.

Ask a Mistress Forum FAQ
Profile Help

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 4:55:05 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline 		I don't mind 'some' resistance in the early stages of getting to know someone. It can be fun as it was in the case I mentioned above. I don't want resistance to important topics - or ones I deem important. If there is resistance there, then obviously we aren't compatable.

What perplexed me was the notion of someone resisting against something/someone they say they want.

_____________________________

4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.

Ask a Mistress Forum FAQ
Profile Help

(in reply to masterlink65)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 5:00:42 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

in all cases, when im getting to know a person ill keep the brakes on (resist any urgent pushing from them) - primarily to be sure that my first, second or third impression is correct. so often in the early stages people are putting on their best front, wanting to impress, maybe a bit careful about what they say and how they say it. over a bit of time, as conversation flows openly and those initial 'introductory' chats turn into real discourse and go well i tend to then let the brakes off.



I think this paragraph helped me most. While in my communication with this gentleman I 'feel' as though I am being completely ME and honest about who I am, it is still early. So not all topics have been covered. I keep forgetting that some people on here are game players (I should know better, really), but I tend to take people for face value since I don't have anything to hide and keep thinking the same is true for others when it clearly is not.

So thanks for that reminder.

_____________________________

4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.

Ask a Mistress Forum FAQ
Profile Help

(in reply to lally2)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 5:02:14 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz
If you are not the type of submissive who resists as I describe, why don't you resist?



Damn I thought this was going to be about resistence play...





By all means. Since all of you helped me please feel free to make this a Resistance/Capture play thread

_____________________________

4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.

Ask a Mistress Forum FAQ
Profile Help

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 5:23:01 PM   
Drifa


Posts: 547
Joined: 7/27/2007
From: Rural Texas
Status: offline 		Resistance is for tickle fights while lazing in bed on Saturday morning.

(in reply to mc1234)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Resistance - 1/15/2010 6:14:48 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline 		I thought that was what rope was for.

_____________________________

4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.

Ask a Mistress Forum FAQ
Profile Help

(in reply to Drifa)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Resistance - 1/16/2010 12:33:57 PM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz


quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

in all cases, when im getting to know a person ill keep the brakes on (resist any urgent pushing from them) - primarily to be sure that my first, second or third impression is correct. so often in the early stages people are putting on their best front, wanting to impress, maybe a bit careful about what they say and how they say it. over a bit of time, as conversation flows openly and those initial 'introductory' chats turn into real discourse and go well i tend to then let the brakes off.



I think this paragraph helped me most. While in my communication with this gentleman I 'feel' as though I am being completely ME and honest about who I am, it is still early. So not all topics have been covered. I keep forgetting that some people on here are game players (I should know better, really), but I tend to take people for face value since I don't have anything to hide and keep thinking the same is true for others when it clearly is not.

So thanks for that reminder.



i understand what youre saying. but its possible to remain open, honest and youreself, to be you and dont ever stop being that. i havent at all. but i have learnt to take longer and read between the lines, listen to them on the phone, their sense of humour, their politics and world view. you can learn so much from a person by taking a bit of time, keeping the brakes on inside while at the same time encouraging them to open up and talk freely.

on quite a few occasions what ive thought might be a genuine prospect, by being open, free speaking and thus encouraging them to be open and free speaking ive realised that we are poles apart on so many things that would grate eventually.



_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to Domin8tingUrDrmz)
Profile   Post #: 35
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Resistance Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078