RE: Best ways to meet others

RE: Best ways to meet others (Full Version)

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SailingBum -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/11/2010 8:37:05 PM)
red as I said in my post. I did NOT send that email... lemme get this straight someone who cut n paste a email and expects me to be nice to them???? oh oh and I might add she did in fact ask me what I thought. And Im being vile how when i merely pointed out that they show a extreme lack of self control. When you come to me with a question your asking for my opinion be prepared to know exactly how I feel. It's no different than telling my girl lose those extra lbs youve put on. Get over it BadOne

Andalusite -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/11/2010 8:39:32 PM)
I initiated contact with a few men, back when I was looking. I would not have sent anything like what StrongSpirit wrote, and I think most men would assume it was a scammer. Instead, I asked them a couple of questions about things that were in their profile, mentioned what drew me to write to them/notice them in the first place, and what commonalities we had. I kept it fairly short and sweet, maybe 2 paragraphs or so.

sexyred1 -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/11/2010 8:50:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SailingBum red as I said in my post. I did NOT send that email... lemme get this straight someone who cut n paste a email and expects me to be nice to them???? oh oh and I might add she did in fact ask me what I thought. And Im being vile how when i merely pointed out that they show a extreme lack of self control. When you come to me with a question your asking for my opinion be prepared to know exactly how I feel. It's no different than telling my girl lose those extra lbs youve put on. Get over it BadOne BadOne, why so angry about cut and pasted emails? I get them all the time from guys I think are ugly or something. If they ask me what I think about them, I don't tell them you are hideously ugly and fat and stupid so you will never Dom anyone, ever. It is different to tell a stranger something cruel when they wrote you in good faith than telling YOUR girl to lose weight. That is your negotiated dynamic with her, you have none with a stranger. It would be better and kinder to ignore them or just say, I am taken or not interested. And if you read any of my posts, you know I don't sugar coat, but I don't try to be cruel needlessly. You can tell me to fuck off if you want, I am done.

afkarr -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/11/2010 9:01:17 PM)
Check CL under the men 4 women catagory, and see what pops up. If you want to attract a Daddy Dom here, focus on that and not the playing with women to, perhaps just mention you'd be open to it. And are you a switch, or a sub? Because many Doms who are looking for subs only search under the sub cataogry, and not the switch one. Personally, although I top women ( but don't bottom to them) and sub to men ( but don't top them) I find it more productive to list myself as a straight f sub here, rather than a bi switch, and leave my girl pet hunting to CL, which is more local and doesn't clutter up my mailbox with what I'm not looking for.

SailingBum -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/11/2010 9:18:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 quote: ORIGINAL: SailingBum red as I said in my post. I did NOT send that email... lemme get this straight someone who cut n paste a email and expects me to be nice to them???? oh oh and I might add she did in fact ask me what I thought. And Im being vile how when i merely pointed out that they show a extreme lack of self control. When you come to me with a question your asking for my opinion be prepared to know exactly how I feel. It's no different than telling my girl lose those extra lbs youve put on. Get over it BadOne BadOne, why so angry about cut and pasted emails? I get them all the time from guys I think are ugly or something. If they ask me what I think about them, I don't tell them you are hideously ugly and fat and stupid so you will never Dom anyone, ever. It is different to tell a stranger something cruel when they wrote you in good faith than telling YOUR girl to lose weight. That is your negotiated dynamic with her, you have none with a stranger. It would be better and kinder to ignore them or just say, I am taken or not interested. And if you read any of my posts, you know I don't sugar coat, but I don't try to be cruel needlessly. You can tell me to fuck off if you want, I am done. Hey red Let's get this straight right now...im not angry at all. I would have to vested in you or the OP to get pissed off at either of you. You and I are having a conversation at least that is the way im viewing it. For the record anger and hate are emotions I typically dont subscribe to. Wasted energy Your posts dont stand out in my mind. So I dont have a feel for your style. This will now be the 3 rd time ive said this. I did NOT reply to her email. I did infact ignore it. Your other point I did not do not negotiate weight or much of anything else. If you come to me ask me how to meet someone. And I suggest that they might lose a few lbs and you think that is wrong. whatever BadOne

osf -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/11/2010 9:38:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: blkswitch I was in the chat room and asked a question and was laughed out of the room. So, I'll "safely" ask here without being put down (I hope). What is the best way to meet a Daddy Dom? There are many couples and men on Collarme that are fictitious and are not at all who they seem. I've spoken to one person who seems okay. I'm not good at asking questions (in real life, nor online). So, to be on the VERY SAFE side. How should I go about this (leaving "natural" instincts out of it all together). Hope to get the answers and not be made to look silly here also. Thank you. there are more daddy doms than there are daddy doms that can last Now you have me wondering what the half-life of a Daddy Dom is? it's when he realizes she will be like that forever, or he's fucked her, whichever comes first

DesFIP -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 4:57:05 AM)
If you can't trust your instincts then that is the problem. Because you are going to go with the guy that attracts you. And if you already know that you are only attracted to abusers, as an example, then you shouldn't be getting into a relationship. See if you do get involved with a good guy, but you aren't attracted to good guys, then you'll screw with the good guy's head by not responding passionately to him. And he deserves better than that. First fix your own problems so you instinctively respond to the good guys. Because someone you meet may have been the perfect daddy dom for someone else, but that doesn't mean he'll work for you and vice versa.

NuevaVida -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 7:48:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: StrongSpirit Something along the lines of ... hi sir. I hope you don't mind me asking for attention. i know that someone as wonderful as you is most likely taken. but could you please take a look at my profile and tell me how to attract a man like you? Will do wonders for attracting the right dominant. I know it would work on me if a woman sent me that email Unless she is confident and self assured and would be totally untrue to herself by sending something like that to a complete stranger. To the OP: Just be yourself. Let your personality shine, whatever it is. You can't find the right match for yourself if you're spending your energy being something you're not - whether it's online, at local "lifestyle" events, or anywhere else. When I dropped the idea that I needed to act a certain way in order to fit whatever description, I became free and uninhibited and happy. Next thing I knew, I was hanging out with a really cool man who liked all those personality traits I had stifled for so long. Now he owns me and is my Daddy. It starts internally. Know yourself, express yourself, and have fun. :)

specialk2611 -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 8:46:58 AM)
Definately the best way is real life events - Munches, Clubs, Workshops etc...Anything where D/s people get together to whatever. Not saying that online is not a good way, but I agree with a lot that's been said in this thread, that it cuts out so many problems - fantasists, fakes, liars, internet personality vs real life personality, real life chemistry/dynamic. There are so many agendas for why people choose online vs real life, and usually they are not positive! To go against that, many people have met their loved ones online, so it is not black and white. But if you are looking for a relationship than you should be a functioning human being capable (but some choose not to, even if they are, which is fine) of meeting people in real life as there will be 1000 more obligations to live up to in a relationship than just this 1.

blkswitch -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 5:01:08 PM)
Well, that didn't work! Yeah, that quote: was pretty out there and rude. quote: If you wanna be overweight rock on with your bad self. But if you dont have the discipline/control your weight, what in the world makes you think that anyone else would have the desire to control you??? That person is on this website. Hmmm, wonder why he hasn't found his thin well to do chick yet? Keep searching. And keep your rudeness to yourself.

thishereboi -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 5:14:52 PM)
I would find local munches and events and go out and meet people. Ask questions and listen.

RedMagic1 -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 5:26:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: blkswitch That person is on this website. Hmmm, wonder why he hasn't found his thin well to do chick yet? Keep searching. And keep your rudeness to yourself. Wow. Well, this shows why you're having a hard time finding a decent guy. Not everyone with a profile here is "searching." I'm not looking for anything on this site other than pleasant conversation, and I have a profile. Beyond that, I happen to agree with SailingBum -- I won't date a woman who weighs more than I do, unless she can benchpress more than I can. Should I close down my profile for your convenience? Listen to the ladies. StrongSpirit's dating advice totally sucked. I don't know what's up with that guy. He's been posting here on and off for a year or so, and he doesn't seem to have figured much out. Oh well. I believe DesFip's post was most relevant to your own situation. Please read it several times.

juliaoceania -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 10:38:00 PM)
quote: How should I go about this (leaving "natural" instincts out of it all together). Instincts are what keeps a person alive, why would you want to ignore yours? I am really interested in what you meant by that portion of your OP

sexyred1 -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 11:02:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RedMagic1 quote: ORIGINAL: blkswitch That person is on this website. Hmmm, wonder why he hasn't found his thin well to do chick yet? Keep searching. And keep your rudeness to yourself. Wow. Well, this shows why you're having a hard time finding a decent guy. Not everyone with a profile here is "searching." I'm not looking for anything on this site other than pleasant conversation, and I have a profile. Beyond that, I happen to agree with SailingBum -- I won't date a woman who weighs more than I do, unless she can benchpress more than I can. Should I close down my profile for your convenience? Listen to the ladies. StrongSpirit's dating advice totally sucked. I don't know what's up with that guy. He's been posting here on and off for a year or so, and he doesn't seem to have figured much out. Oh well. I believe DesFip's post was most relevant to your own situation. Please read it several times. Red, I am surprised at your reply here. She was replying to SailingBum's nasty comment. She was attacked for her weight with no provocation. Yours or SailingBum's weight preferences have no bearing on the OP's question and it was rude.

juliaoceania -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 11:32:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: blkswitch I was in the chat room and asked a question and was laughed out of the room. So, I'll "safely" ask here without being put down (I hope). What is the best way to meet a Daddy Dom? There are many couples and men on Collarme that are fictitious and are not at all who they seem. I've spoken to one person who seems okay. I'm not good at asking questions (in real life, nor online). So, to be on the VERY SAFE side. How should I go about this (leaving "natural" instincts out of it all together). Hope to get the answers and not be made to look silly here also. Thank you. there are more daddy doms than there are daddy doms that can last Now you have me wondering what the half-life of a Daddy Dom is? Has me wondering what he meant... vewy cwyptic

WinsomeDefiance -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 11:49:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania quote: ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: blkswitch I was in the chat room and asked a question and was laughed out of the room. So, I'll "safely" ask here without being put down (I hope). What is the best way to meet a Daddy Dom? There are many couples and men on Collarme that are fictitious and are not at all who they seem. I've spoken to one person who seems okay. I'm not good at asking questions (in real life, nor online). So, to be on the VERY SAFE side. How should I go about this (leaving "natural" instincts out of it all together). Hope to get the answers and not be made to look silly here also. Thank you. there are more daddy doms than there are daddy doms that can last Now you have me wondering what the half-life of a Daddy Dom is? Has me wondering what he meant... vewy cwyptic I think he meant DaddyDoms are a fragile lot, suffering from dadydom rot, and babygirls are demanding soulsuckers, bleeding dry all them old fuckers.

juliaoceania -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 11:51:41 PM)
quote: Red, I am surprised at your reply here. She was replying to SailingBum's nasty comment. She was attacked for her weight with no provocation. Yours or SailingBum's weight preferences have no bearing on the OP's question and it was rude. If everyone in the United States hid in shame due to a weight problem there would be a lot less sex going on[:D]. I have struggled with my weight some myself. I do not think that the OP looked terribly overweight... and yes, some men prefer a little meat on the bones... the OP is far from BBW territory, and there are men that like that body type too. I do find it rather sad that so much emphasis is put on how much women weigh, and men go around sporting a spare tire, and no one acts like they are undesirable for it. No one shames them. I have never seen a "fat doms suck" thread. No one comments on their lack of self control. Even though I do what I can to keep my weight in a healthy range by walking and exercising... and granted it takes a lot of self discipline, I would not want a dominant that was so crass as to suggest that fat women are somehow inferior to them, or lack control, or are "less than" they are and unfit to dominate.. perhaps they are not their preference, but whatever.

juliaoceania -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 11:53:37 PM)
quote: I think he meant DaddyDoms are a fragile lot, suffering from dadydom rot, and babygirls are demanding soulsuckers, bleeding dry all them old fuckers. I have a Daddy, he has been broken a few times over the last few years (as in physically injured), being that he is much more fragile than he thinks he is at times (teaching full contact self defense can be injurious after all), but he always mends up after a while....

WinsomeDefiance -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/12/2010 11:59:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania quote: I think he meant DaddyDoms are a fragile lot, suffering from dadydom rot, and babygirls are demanding soulsuckers, bleeding dry all them old fuckers. I have a Daddy, he has been broken a few times over the last few years (as in physically injured), being that he is much more fragile than he thinks he is at times (teaching full contact self defense can be injurious after all), but he always mends up after a while.... HUGS to your Daddy. I should have added a disclaimer that its what I thought he meant, and had no bearing on my personal opinions. My lymeric would have started something like: DaddyDoms are a scary sort......don't let the smiles fool ya, they spank little girls for domly sport then send them off to the corner to school ya.

juliaoceania -> RE: Best ways to meet others (2/13/2010 12:01:01 AM)
quote: DaddyDoms are a scary sort......don't let the smiles fool ya, they spank little girls for domly sport then send them off to the corner to school ya. I love the limerick... how true it is... I used to get corner time a lot[;)]

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