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LadyPact -> RE: Lame posts: "No, I'm not into that. Sorry" Why bother? (1/28/2010 7:53:27 AM)
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ORIGINAL: shallowdeep
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ORIGINAL: LadyPact
From your comment, I think you are, mistakenly, assuming the primary function of this board, is for the benefit of sub males. Many of us do not see it that way.
Sorry if I gave that impression. Akasha had framed this topic in terms of the educational value such responses would provide to subs, which is really the key point I'm rather skeptical about. Others seemed to agree this was a significant part of their motivation in giving a response, so I was simply continuing in that vein. I certainly didn't mean to imply that was the primary purpose of the board, but I thought it was the point under discussion. I hope that clarifies why I framed things as I did.
This is something I actually addressed earlier in the thread when someone used the analogy of teaching a dog. Did you really teach the dog not to do a certain thing, or did you really teach him to be afraid of the stick? I got dinged for saying, more or less that I really didn't care. As long as the desired result is obtained, that's the result I'm happy to see. If the dog has stopped peeing on the carpet because he's afraid of the stick, it's still effective.
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Believe it or not, putting a comment out there on a subject that I am not interested in actually drops the drive by mail ratio. Often, what happens when someone new comes around here and starts posting the types of threads that we're discussing here, they will start jumping around the other threads and find the Dommes that post frequently. At that point, they will start mass emailing all of us, often with a repeat of what they asked in the thread they created. The 'head them off at the pass' technique works in this area.
I can definitely see how this rationale makes sense for frequent posters. It was something I had not considered; thank you for the added perspective.
You're quite welcome.
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Each time I stand up and say that isn't what I'm here for, I make a dent in that vending machine mentality.
Perhaps, but this veers into the 'educational value' that I'm still skeptical of. I can accept letting loose might be effective at getting the OP to stop. In persistent cases (e.g. bumping or starting new threads), I allow it may even be the option I would resort to. But does it really put a dent in their mentality? The OP may well scamper off under a hail of righteous indignation, but do they really reflect on it? Do they even understand why they came under attack? Or do they head straight back for the reassuring arms of porn that doesn't talk back? How many return as reformed, intelligent contributors? If they actually are open to learning, I suspect being ignored would be an equally effective lesson that they need to change their approach and mentality. If they're not, it's already a lost cause. It strikes me as spending time tilting at windmills.
This part really doesn't hold much consequence to Me. There are cases where they do come back and make excellent contributors around here. (I'll allow those who feel that they fit this category speak for themselves, as I don't wish to embarrass anyone.) If they run back to their porn to indulge their fantasies, to Me, it's just as good. Whatever they are doing in their world, if it's not effecting Mine, has no bearing. Very much like if someone has their own yard littered with trash the next town over. I couldn't care less. If it's a yard here in My neighborhood, I care because the property value goes down.
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The truth of the matter is that, even if a good number of us reply negatively to a trollish post, the post doesn't stay at the top of the forum that long. More often than not, we get a good laugh.
If this is how most women here view it, that makes perfect sense. Sometimes I think I see more than laughter, though. I get the sense that these things really can grate on some women. Because of that, I wonder if there is potential for a more productive tone that everyone would appreciate if lame posts were more frequently ignored.
This topic seems to have gotten off topic in some rather bizarre ways, so I may try to let it fade, but I wanted to thank you both very much for your responses.
I won't say 'most' but I think Lockit did confirm that it is the experience, at least for some of us. While it is a generalization, it happens most often when related to certain kinks. Forced fem, AB/DL, and toilet slavery to name a few. In My opinion, these are areas that a good number of folks won't engage in at all, and those that will tend to only be willing to do so within the context of an established dynamic. (I'd even go so far as to say this is exactly why some pros who are willing to take on clients with these interests make the money that they do.) Because these are less popular kinks, at least on a casual level, some folks with those interest become some of the most annoying types of 'do-me's' out there. If going upside their head with the clue by four (the stick) works, it gets the desired result.
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