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juliaoceania -> RE: My submission (1/29/2010 7:40:20 PM)
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ORIGINAL: osf
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ORIGINAL: juliaoceania
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ORIGINAL: osf
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ORIGINAL: CalifChick
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ORIGINAL: osf
to me submission is a willingness to do that which you're not willing to do
And that's why you're not a sub.
Cali
what's your excuse for not being a sub?
Well if the only definition of a sub is yours only self loathing individuals would pony up for that position (at least from my perspective) and since my self esteem isn't wrapped up in my subliness, I will say that your definition of submissiveness is fairly much bullshit....
Just sayin'
i understand me much better when you're around, thank you
i'm beginning to understand submission is only doing that which you want, how silly of me all these years and relationships
Im not the one stating who is and who isn't a submissive... you are...
And I do not agree with you, and according to the dominant men I have been involved with I am extremely submissive... I just do not care to define myself that way these days. I am a human being.
This human being would challenge the definition of being submissive as only people who engage in relationships where they are forced to do things they do not want to do. Your view of what a submissive is just doesn't wash with me...
My view is that submission can include being with a person that pushes you to do that which you may not want to do, but it is more about an orientation to a relationship.. and that orientation is to be pleasing, supportive, acquiescing, adoring, a follower, the softer side of the relationship... it does not mean I desire to engage in emotional masochism.
I have been talking to my former dominant about reconciling with him for about a month now, and it looks like we may try to put it back together again... and I cannot help but react to him in a submissive way, he is deep in my head and heart... and there is no way in hell he would EVER want to push me to do things that I found hurtful or harmful. He doesn't want me to be in emotional pain. He certainly would never have me fear him. He is still my Daddy, and he has fucked up some and I have fucked up some... but that does not change our orientation to each other.
You know, I try not to judge what other people want, and I do not judge what you want.... but when you come on message boards and you tell someone that identifies as a submissive that she ain't one, well I will call bullshit on you for that. It is bullshit. In my estimation you have very little idea how close, intimate, and truly satisfying these relationships can be for both people involved... and they do not have to include fear and self loathing. Now if that is what you want, and the lady consents, well knock yerselves out... but coming on here and telling another sub that she isn't one because she does not want to walk softly while her dominant beats her into submission... well that just isn't true.
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