Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Things my parents taught me


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> Things my parents taught me Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Things my parents taught me - 3/25/2006 3:58:41 PM   
ThatLilBrat


Posts: 149
Joined: 2/14/2005
Status: offline
I OWE MY PARENTS!!

1. My parents taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."



2. My parents taught me RELIGION .
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

 

3. My parents taught me about TIME TRAVEL .
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

 


4. My parents taught me LOGIC .
" Because I said so, that's why."

 

5. My parents taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."



6. My parents taught me FORESIGHT .
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
 
 

7. My parents taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
 
 

8. My parents taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

 

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONIST.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
 
 

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

 

11. My parents taught me about WEATHER .
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

 

12 My parents taught me about HYPOCRISY .
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
 
 

13. My parents taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
 
 

14. My parents taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
 
 

15. My parents taught me about ENVY .
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

 

16. My parents taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

 

17. My parents taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"


 

18. My parents taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."


 

19. My parents taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"


 

20 . My parents taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."


 

21. My parents taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."


 

22. My parents taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."





23. My parents taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"


 
24. My parents taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."



25. My parents taught me about JUSTICE .
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.



26. My parents taught me about TRADITION.

"I'm going to 'teach' my children the same lessons.

_____________________________

Remember the three R's:
Respect for self;
Respect for others; and
Responsibility for ALL your actions and accept the consquences of your decisions
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Things my parents taught me - 3/25/2006 5:02:15 PM   
beachstoyboy


Posts: 33
Joined: 12/26/2005
From: Coastal Southern California
Status: offline
LMAO, that's great! And sooo true.

_____________________________

Beach's toyboy
"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation"
~~~
http://www.myspace.com/beachs_toyboy
http://www.flickr.com/people/beachmystress/
http://beachmystress.viviti.com/

(in reply to ThatLilBrat)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Things my parents taught me - 3/25/2006 5:59:08 PM   
cynthiamarie


Posts: 205
Joined: 3/11/2005
From: Bluefield, WV, USA
Status: offline
*reads what her mentor wrote and laughs*

OMG, my mother said all of those to me as well! 

*adds another one to the list:  If you ever try to commit suicide again, I'll KILL YOU!*  I was 12 or 13 at the time.

(in reply to beachstoyboy)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Things my parents taught me - 3/25/2006 7:00:31 PM   
truesub4u


Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
LOL that was so good... had to e-mail it to my parents... lol

thanks!


_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to ThatLilBrat)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Things my parents taught me - 3/25/2006 7:03:23 PM   
groundling


Posts: 31
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline
the Irony is the greatest!

(in reply to ThatLilBrat)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Things my parents taught me - 3/25/2006 7:20:43 PM   
MistressStchWich


Posts: 74
Joined: 8/31/2005
Status: offline
I have tears streaming down my face! Too Funny! Thanks. I hadn't had my prescribed three belly laughs today...I think I'm full til "the middle of next week." LOL

_____________________________

Freedom is an expensive enterprise, but well worth the cost. Especially when extracted from the enemy. `Erehc Krueger

(in reply to groundling)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Things my parents taught me - 3/25/2006 8:10:21 PM   
ThatLilBrat


Posts: 149
Joined: 2/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: truesub4u

LOL that was so good... had to e-mail it to my parents... lol

thanks!




*hangs head in shame*  
 
My mom e-mailed it to me

_____________________________

Remember the three R's:
Respect for self;
Respect for others; and
Responsibility for ALL your actions and accept the consquences of your decisions

(in reply to truesub4u)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Things my parents taught me - 3/25/2006 8:20:33 PM   
preciousgem


Posts: 146
Joined: 5/13/2005
From: Hazel Park,MI
Status: offline
my mom and kids and i wehre rolling around on the floor laffing so hard

_____________________________

i would rather be hated for who i am then loved for who i am not.

jal trik kar Va, ja Vana'she

(in reply to ThatLilBrat)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Things my parents taught me - 4/9/2006 12:48:55 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline
I think I heard everyone of those growing up.

(in reply to preciousgem)
Profile   Post #: 9
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> Things my parents taught me Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078