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RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 12:41:54 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		that died out when the Internet was born...some never reply, even if they get a message from someone that matches what they are looking for...

perhaps it's fear of commitment??? nobody knows. that probably why too many people only connect with others NOT living close enough to interact with on a regular basis.

maybe there's alot of players and fakes out there too...i can't tell for certain.


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(in reply to MasterRenegade77)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 12:54:51 PM   
justjill


Posts: 28
Joined: 3/19/2006
Status: offline 		Part of reading a message and profile is not just about what information it provides but also what tone is presented. A negative, arrogant or narcisstic tone will turn off women who will then just hit delete even if they fit your physical requirements.

Too many men are too negative in their profiles or write them with such qualifiers that people who are not interested are losers or fakes and then they wonder why no one wants to wrtie them!



(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 12:55:13 PM   
SirKenin


Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline 		I can not BELIEVE I was STUPID enough to read another one of this guy's threads!!!!   It is always the same old stupid crap.  No wonder nobody responds to his emails, if they are anything even remotely close to his posts.

GRRRF!! 

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Hi. I don't care. Thanks.

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Catholic Church: Serving up guilt since 107 AD.

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 1:02:52 PM   
MasterRenegade77


Posts: 1852
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Upstate N.Y. (Broome Co.)
Status: offline 		Thank you for your input now I have to edit My Journal too LOL.... Is Starting to Think a Real True to the Old School Lifestyle Dom hasn't got a Prayer in Hell anymore anyway!!!

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 1:12:52 PM   
Shayna


Posts: 205
Joined: 1/16/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterRenegade77

Thank you for your input now I have to edit My Journal too LOL.... Is Starting to Think a Real True to the Old School Lifestyle Dom hasn't got a Prayer in Hell anymore anyway!!!


You might learn something listening to the feedback from the women who've provided it. Men and women respond (usually) to the same thing: respectful, centered, self-confident, positive people. Acting like a victim and complaining about responses you've gotten is a major turn off for most people. It's not wrong to be annoyed, disappointed, etc. but bitch to anyone/everyone BUT others publicly on CM. If you are seriously looking , this is where you need to put out positive vibes.

(in reply to MasterRenegade77)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 1:25:17 PM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline
Hoosier Scorpio,

I am very close to a sub you tried to contact a while back, so I know your approach technique. Now I'm going to be blunt and honest here in trying to help you, but I know you will feel insulted.

Frankly, in your posts and letters you come off sounding like a boob. Your sentence structure, spelling, grammar, and thought sequence are all very poor, and that's putting it mildly. Then on top of that you get whinny and demanding very quickly. You wrote several letters to her demanding a response all the while she was overwhelmed and juggling over 500 letters. She even wrote you back telling you this, and all you did was whine some more. Needless to say she just deleted you and never looked back. I'm quite sure you run into that a lot.

Look in the mirror and you will see your problem. The good news for you is you can do something about this. Take some time in writing. Edit your letters, try and sound confident and intelligent. Patience is a virtue.

This same sub is now in contact with several exciting Dom prospects. Just today she notified the probable number one Dom on her list that she had to cancel a phone call to him tomorrow because she is meeting another candidate. His response was he was more than happy to oblige. First he was glad to see her meeting people because it proved she was real. Second he was confident that her meeting others would only reflect well on him, as he is confident in himself. Third he did all this with grace and eloquence somehow sounding humble in his arrogance.  Take a lesson from that.

< Message edited by TeeGO -- 3/26/2006 1:27:12 PM >

(in reply to SirKenin)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 2:23:38 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

In agreement with Stef and Geoff..... Untill you get a profile up and running......
ShutTheFuckUp



/giggles

Master IronBear, you do have a way with words

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 2:33:44 PM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline 		In keeping with the Aahnold theme I started earlier in this thread, here's an image to echo IB's "advice."

~stef

< Message edited by stef -- 3/26/2006 2:34:03 PM >

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(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 2:37:06 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		OMG, I about fell over laughing. That is absolutly hilarious.

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Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 6:11:03 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		To Teego...Nods..I had suspected as much concerning HS..He actually once had a profile, but in profile he threatened to erase if he got no responses to his e-mails.Guess he did not,and he did erase.What gets me is that after he starts these threads you never hear any more from him.Suspects he reads them but is unwilling to actually listen and take the advice.So he continues to find a different wording of same theme in order to find some way to convince himself that it is not he that may need to change but that he is completely without fault with his search for his second slave..(eye roll)...be well..tempting

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 7:00:47 PM   
Saratov


Posts: 1716
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EvilGeoff

I was going to check out HS's profile and see if there was something there that might be putting off all these potential submissive soul-mates he's so desperately whining about not answering his emails.

There's no profile there to check, nothing to respond too.  Geeez, why in the name of whatever Higher Power you have faith in, would someone respond to a non-profile kinda guy?  No profile = no response in MY play book, for sure.

So I'll echo steph's appropo sound bite in my own way.

Quit yer bitchin'. 

YIK
- Geoff


Uuuum yup, I decided to look too, No Profile Found.  I agree with those who've already said it.... if ya want responses Fill in Your Profile!!!  As completely as you can, not only what you want/like but what you don't.
If you don't like or can't stand electric play say so, I wont bother you, don't like cp--- same thing.  Don't list something under 'curious' if you don't want people to offer to help you experience it...
Okay, got to get a mat for this soap box, my feet hurt.  Anyone else want to use it?

(in reply to EvilGeoff)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/26/2006 7:56:17 PM   
Evanesce


Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline 		OK, I've gotta jump in here, simply because I have this overwhelming need to protect the underdog, and I think y'all are being just a bit too hard on old HS.
 
I've known Scorpio in real life for some six or seven years.  I will tell you that, while he certainly needs to take a basic writing course, he does not come across as a complete idiot in person.  His biggest problem, that I can see, is that in all these years of attending munches and demos and events, he's not really grown past where he was when I first met him, and he's making the same newbie mistakes now that he did back then.  It doesn't make him a bad person... just one who needs a little more education and a few people skills.
 
Granted, complaints are beyond annoying if that's all you get from someone, but I guess I keep hoping it gets better.

_____________________________

Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich


(in reply to Saratov)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/27/2006 1:49:03 AM   
CDNGirlyGirl


Posts: 7
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada
Status: offline 		I always reply.

Most men around here don't like the answers I give.

CDNGirlyGirl,

the most bratty, unsubbly woman on Collarme.com.

32 Dominants can't be wrong!

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/27/2006 6:04:54 AM   
enslavegirl


Posts: 111
Joined: 2/8/2006
Status: offline 		i guess there is a chance that the banana splits and lemonaide have made a comeback???

< Message edited by enslavegirl -- 3/27/2006 6:05:39 AM >

(in reply to CDNGirlyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/27/2006 6:14:03 AM   
MissyRane


Posts: 1032
Joined: 5/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: enslavegirl

i guess there is a chance that the banana splits and lemonaide have made a comeback???

LOLOLOL
But on the more serious notes I always reply, or at  least 99% of the PMs I get..sometimes people are happy with it sometimes they aint, I don't know but if I receive a rude and desrespectful PM I don't bother replying in a respectful way n then people often get offended..I think peoples PMs should demonstrate what kind of reply they want in response..

(in reply to enslavegirl)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/27/2006 7:30:13 AM   
meatcleaver


Posts: 9030
Joined: 3/13/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CDNGirlyGirl

I always reply.

Most men around here don't like the answers I give.

CDNGirlyGirl,

the most bratty, unsubbly woman on Collarme.com.

32 Dominants can't be wrong!



You mean all 32 have made the same mistake?

I guess all 32 must have been desperate.

< Message edited by meatcleaver -- 3/27/2006 7:32:48 AM >

(in reply to CDNGirlyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/27/2006 7:51:22 AM   
BeachMystress


Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HoosierScorpio
Also the profile is not written in stone what they are looking for it is a general information that people have a hard time expression what they want or looking for in a relationship.



Oh this is one of my pet peves.. those who assume my profile is a guideline and that they can request whatever they want of me. I am an adult and very aware of what I want. If it isn't listed on my profile, I DO NOT WANT IT! I am sick and tired of men writing and asking for things that are not on my profile. While I some times write back asking the person where on my profile it says I want what they're begging for, there are times when I just don't respond.

People should actually put time into their profile. I've spent several hours on mine, refining it as needed. You want to attract someone? Write a damned good profile. Take time over it. Spell and grammar check it. Keep coming back to it and make sure it says what you're seeking. If you don't know exactly what you want, put that on there.



_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to HoosierScorpio)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/27/2006 8:53:12 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Evanesce

OK, I've gotta jump in here, simply because I have this overwhelming need to protect the underdog, and I think y'all are being just a bit too hard on old HS.

I've known Scorpio in real life for some six or seven years. I will tell you that, while he certainly needs to take a basic writing course, he does not come across as a complete idiot in person. His biggest problem, that I can see, is that in all these years of attending munches and demos and events, he's not really grown past where he was when I first met him, and he's making the same newbie mistakes now that he did back then. It doesn't make him a bad person... just one who needs a little more education and a few people skills.

Granted, complaints are beyond annoying if that's all you get from someone, but I guess I keep hoping it gets better.


I'll second your opinion, Evanesce, because I've met Scorpio several times at Headspace workshops and at GLLA and other events.

I've seen him with a several partners but usually not the same one at two different events. Considering these encounters were easily months apart I didn't take it very seriously that he had different partners -- I'm all about testing things out and trying various people rather than just into the serious pool right away.

It was clear to me that he was trying to learn and meet people but something just wasn't working though I'm not sure why not. Since he didn't live in the same town as me, I couldn't really track very well. Plus I've never been sure of the etiquette for offering someone advice at a munch or workshop when you know you aren't going to see them for months.

(of course, look at how much "advice" I spin out here onine -- somehow that feels different to me)

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Evanesce)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/27/2006 6:05:23 PM   
CERCKL


Posts: 1039
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline
quote:


quote:

ORIGINAL: Evanesce

OK, I've gotta jump in here, simply because I have this overwhelming need to protect the underdog, and I think y'all are being just a bit too hard on old HS.

I've known Scorpio in real life for some six or seven years. I will tell you that, while he certainly needs to take a basic writing course, he does not come across as a complete idiot in person. His biggest problem, that I can see, is that in all these years of attending munches and demos and events, he's not really grown past where he was when I first met him, and he's making the same newbie mistakes now that he did back then. It doesn't make him a bad person... just one who needs a little more education and a few people skills.

Granted, complaints are beyond annoying if that's all you get from someone, but I guess I keep hoping it gets better.



I'll second your opinion, Evanesce, because I've met Scorpio several times at Headspace workshops and at GLLA and other events.

I've seen him with a several partners but usually not the same one at two different events. Considering these encounters were easily months apart I didn't take it very seriously that he had different partners -- I'm all about testing things out and trying various people rather than just into the serious pool right away.

It was clear to me that he was trying to learn and meet people but something just wasn't working though I'm not sure why not. Since he didn't live in the same town as me, I couldn't really track very well. Plus I've never been sure of the etiquette for offering someone advice at a munch or workshop when you know you aren't going to see them for months.

(of course, look at how much "advice" I spin out here onine -- somehow that feels different to me)

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo


Fine...read several posts all complaining about why don't I get What/who I want? ...and if I don't get it, it must be their fault.
Could be, though I've never bought into the thought that what happens to Me is anybody's responsibility but My own...My wife left Me, her decision, tried to 'fix' it (outta habit?) didn't work...not all My fault granted and her choice to explore different areas of her life but I saw it coming when I was honest with My self...what does this have to do with the post? Take responsibility.
Know what you want, what you are looking for...state it clearly; when you email someone, be semi-articulate, engage interest...read her damned profile, all of it! Period. Realize that you are gettin no emails and she is getting 200/day or so...why does she want to spend her time getting back to you? If she does email back a reply, why would she want to continue a dialogue with you? If you 'click', why do you do so more than the other 500+ people who've emailed her?
I've been here less than a month; the fifth day I sent an initial email to she who is Mine now...I own her, I am training her, she is Mine...I looked back, of the only 20+ people I emailed, only six replied, of those I have one friend, one I email off and on with philisophical, spiritual dialogues and the one I own...you don't need a lot of replies, you just need the proper replies...
...another note; checked, no profile??? Why would they reply to nothingness? Agree with some thought put into your profile, leaver journal entries, this is how you leave an impression...and to another response; if they say they're busy, not looking, not interested, don't reply...make a note and continue; why waste your time or hers?
Remember too, this is the internet, it's a great tool and you might find who you seek but don't invest too much in it...if the statement of little personal growth is true, well, you can always develop interests but shure as hell don't expect anyone to come to you and accept you if you aren't confidant and comfortable with who you are and who you're becoming...My Self, I don't have the time or inclination to invest My time with anyone that there is not some return...creative, intellectual, spiritual, interests...too many souls out there.
...and if those are correct and you just have a habit of whining and not willing to take any pro-active steps...YAWN...maybe somebody else will find something of use.
C


_____________________________

AND I AM TOO AN ASSHOLE, I HAVE REFERENCES!!!

"Please, please, please believe me, I really am an asshole. All that Enlightenment and Higher Learning shit was all a ruse."

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Why do I notice so many complain not finding real p... - 3/27/2006 6:29:22 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		I agree with you mostly CERCKL. When I see the same person postingthe same things time after time in different formats, I have to think that there is a major problem in what the poster does. maybe it is simply the bad use of the written word. Perhaps that carries over into their speech and thus into their social behaviours.... The Net is a great place to ask for and get help, however if you dont listen, then why bother posting and being annoying?  In another thread, a guy posted about hiis difficulties. he was chewed out about hisprofile and attitude in CM ......... Well bugger me dead, He LISTENED..... He LEARNED.... He CHANGED.... He ASKED FOR HELP IN REWRITING HIS PROFILE!!    Sure if some of you feel inclined to help the OP and do know him, the kindest thing you could do is to have a heart to heart and help him learn.. puppy walk him by all means and lets all hope that we see him emerge as a the Dom you guys believe he cliuld be with his own girl.... I'm a hard assed, totally evil prick but I also love happy endings when I find them....

(He who is the Bear who doesn't live in a Big Blue House and also loves watching Blue's Clues)


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to CERCKL)
Profile   Post #: 40
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