When your vanilla friends turn to you... (Full Version)

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Whiplashsmile4 -> When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 3:49:47 AM)

Back a few years ago, an old friend I've known since high school gave me a call out of the blue. It had been awhile since we talked. Anyways, he just got divorced (self admitted it was because he's a workaholic 60-80 hour weeks). I was rather elated that an old friend of mine was taking the time to look me up. Anyways, I gave him directions to where I was living and within an hour he showed up for a visit. At first everythng was awesome, did some catching up on life events and such. Then... he paused for a moment, and was going on about how he wanted to get hooked up with a slave girl for (insert a list of kinky activities). I was sort of stunned at first.

This was my extremely conversative friend, he was sort of the "family ties" Alex Keaton type of guy in high school. A little uptight, conservative and well a little socially awkward at times, with his main focus on his education.

Now there he was in front of me in person, asking if I could hook him up with a Slave Girl. WTF? I paused for a moment, and told him sorry, I did'nt know of anybody to hook him up with to fillfull his list, and that.. well things don't exactly work the way he was imagining.

He hung out and tagged along with me a few times, so I could exposed him to other social circles that I was traveling in. Anyways, none the less. Here it was years later...

At first he did not believe I could not hook him up. He even said that he's pay money for it. This experience was turning as awkard as somebody desparte to get hooked with a drug deal... (lol).... I even got the "Ohh come on man, you've got to know somebody, I know you know somebody, I know you and the kind of girls you know and people you hang out with" routine.

I was faced with the reality of shit happening when worlds collide. I had to sit him down and dis-spell misconceptions and literally give him a dose of reality. Needless to say... when he figured out that I was as about as useful as a Whoreless Pimp to him. He ended up apologizing and bolting (have not seen nor heard from him since).

I'm pretty certain I ain't the only one that's had a vanilla friend turning to them for this.





onlyfreelycaged -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 3:57:31 AM)

I hate when people do that..




Aileen1968 -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:06:28 AM)

The closest I ever got was when we were sitting at a bar in Philly and a gay guy asked me if my man would beat him.
That was a fun night.




pompeii -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:08:59 AM)

My vanilla friends don't know ... 




Aileen1968 -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:09:36 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: pompeii

My vanilla friends don't know ... 


Perhaps if you had a capital P....




allthatjaz -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:11:08 AM)

Did you tell him what you were into first?
Why turn to you of all people?

Steve told a good vanilla friend what he was into and he got almost the same reaction.
We also saw a similar response from some vanilla guys that had managed to slip through the back door of a fet club. Their reaction was pervy. Sort of 'CORRRR YEAH we want some of that'

From what your saying, your friend doesn't sound like he has a life ambition to be a Master but fancies a bit of kink.




LadyAngelika -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:11:46 AM)

I haven't had this happen to me in kink, because I'm not really out to a whole lot of people, but I've had people do this to me when searching for jobs. They come to me because they know I'm have an extremely rich and well developed professional network. Sometimes I give them leads and then I don't even hear a thank you back from them.

In all the years that I helped match make employers and employees, I had one person acknowledge me to a group of friends and one person take me out for drinks to thank me. I guess you can see that I don't do it for the rewards! ;-)

But in the end, I have learned to be weary of the person who comes back from out of the blue looking for favours. There is a word for people like that. Leeches. In fact, there are probably more than one word.

Anyhow, sorry this happened to you. I doesn't sound like a pleasant experience at all.

- LA




DesFIP -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:14:30 AM)

There isn't a public dungeon near you that you could have sent him to? Or give him a couple of websites where kinky people congregate?

I'm curious as to how someone you haven't seen in so many years knew so much about your sex life to ask you, or is that part of what you talk about at high school reunions? Because my relationship is sacrosanct and I don't spread salacious details about to titillate others.




Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:19:55 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

Did you tell him what you were into first?
Why turn to you of all people?

Steve told a good vanilla friend what he was into and he got almost the same reaction.
We also saw a similar response from some vanilla guys that had managed to slip through the back door of a fet club. Their reaction was pervy. Sort of 'CORRRR YEAH we want some of that'

From what your saying, your friend doesn't sound like he has a life ambition to be a Master but fancies a bit of kink.


He's known for years, that I'm into BDSM and that I'm a kink feak. He turned to me because he just got went through a divorce, was on vacation visiting the old home stomping grounds. Was wanting to experience some of his fantasies (since the wife was no longer in the picture).

Needless to say, he turned to me because I was the ONE person he could think to turn to. lol..

You're right he had zero ambition for "the lifestyle" itself (I rephrased your use of the word Master)... Mind you, at times I have Zero Ambition/Interest in becomings somebody's Master. lol.. however the Kink is always there. Being somebody's Master involves a relationship commitment to which one should be selective about anyways.




ranja -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:20:16 AM)

Some people are so sexually ignorant it is very embarrassing in a totally uncool way.... and the losers don't even seem to be aware of it...

you said he thought he was divorced because he was a workaholic???

i suggest sending him an email (if you can be bothered at all) advising him to read the joy of sex by Alex Comfort... it might give him a push towards improving himself.




Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:24:58 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

There isn't a public dungeon near you that you could have sent him to? Or give him a couple of websites where kinky people congregate?

I'm curious as to how someone you haven't seen in so many years knew so much about your sex life to ask you, or is that part of what you talk about at high school reunions? Because my relationship is sacrosanct and I don't spread salacious details about to titillate others.


He's know since our Senior year of high school and we still socialized for a few years afterwards, while he was still going to college. After that, it was the occasional visit when he was in town or the look up. Acually, he was part of the AD&D gaming group of friends I was part of.. so we all would get together from time to time. Everybody go out for drinks and shoot the shit. So yeah...




Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 4:32:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

There isn't a public dungeon near you that you could have sent him to? Or give him a couple of websites where kinky people congregate?

I'm curious as to how someone you haven't seen in so many years knew so much about your sex life to ask you, or is that part of what you talk about at high school reunions? Because my relationship is sacrosanct and I don't spread salacious details about to titillate others.


The Closest Dungeon would have been about 3 hours away, In terms of Local Dungeons LOL.. yeah right... and to be honest with you, He wanted to engage in SEX along with Kinky play. One of the things on His List was ANAL Sex... come on here (going to a dungeon would not be the solution). He was extremely interested in Getting Laid, wanted to tie somebody up and other things. He was on vacation and was looking for a quick kinky hook me up.




allthatjaz -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 5:22:30 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Whiplashsmile4


He's known for years, that I'm into BDSM and that I'm a kink feak. He turned to me because he just got went through a divorce, was on vacation visiting the old home stomping grounds. Was wanting to experience some of his fantasies (since the wife was no longer in the picture).

Needless to say, he turned to me because I was the ONE person he could think to turn to. lol..

You're right he had zero ambition for "the lifestyle" itself (I rephrased your use of the word Master)... Mind you, at times I have Zero Ambition/Interest in becomings somebody's Master. lol.. however the Kink is always there. Being somebody's Master involves a relationship commitment to which one should be selective about anyways.


Just another open minded perve then!!
I know a few nilla guys that would love to do a bit of groveling at a dominants ladies feet. So long as its just for an evening and they get to have some great bondage sex after. These guys have no idea how difficult that would be to find but theres no harm in dreaming!





GraciousLady -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 5:55:06 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Whiplashsmile4

I was faced with the reality of shit happening when worlds collide. I had to sit him down and dis-spell misconceptions and literally give him a dose of reality. Needless to say... when he figured out that I was as about as useful as a Whoreless Pimp to him. He ended up apologizing and bolting (have not seen nor heard from him since).


So sorry this happened to you. Stuff like that can maybe make you feel used and that hurts. But, you were honest with him and that's to your credit. He likely watched all that internet porn and thought that was how it really was. Almost all the subs that contact me think the internet porn they look at is real.




LadyPact -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 8:29:14 AM)

The closest thing that I've had to the experience is similar, but not quite the same angle.  A female friend of Mine went through a break up and the sting was still pretty fresh.  It hadn't ended badly, but she was still in the phase of, 'if he just would have done what I wanted', it would have worked out.  Of course, there were really more problems than that, and she saw that later, but.......

Anyway, during that period, she asked Me a lot of questions about dynamics, obedience, and so on.  It wasn't really a good fit for her, personality wise, but I tend to think that it helped her work through it in a way.  Even though it was just discussion, it allowed her to process things a bit. 




Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 8:34:22 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
... or is that part of what you talk about at high school reunions? Because my relationship is sacrosanct and I don't spread salacious details about to titillate others.


Well given in the context, that I was kinky back then. Trust me girls like to locker room talk just as bad guys do. It's was established that I am/was kinky to a given degree, to a certain range of people. Mind you, not everybody's business back then and most certainly now.

Most people I encouter from High School we engage in conversation about other things.

Now, within the scope of any given friendships. The people closer or closest to you tend to know a little more compared the rest of the heard.

You don't see me making any posts about the last time I was laid on here do you? You don't see me going into any details about the Last time I played either? I might talk about or share experiences that happen in the past.

How to express this, Once you know that a guy is Gay. You simply know or can guess at what he and his life partner do together, without elaborate need for details at a later point in time, say 10, 15 or 20 years later.




xxblushesxx -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 8:35:42 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968


quote:

ORIGINAL: pompeii

My vanilla friends don't know ... 


Perhaps if you had a capital P....


I luv you Aileen1968...(which is harder than saying I luv you Aileen...)




Fitznicely -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 8:46:45 AM)

Again, with the close, but not the same: The boyfriend of a friend of ours has a good line in manipulative mindfuck, not to mention emotional blackmail.

She was having a heart to heart with my girl about how controlling he was (we're 'out' to them both) and wondered aloud if she too should 'just' take on the submissive role to shut him up. My girl gave her a good talking to and putting straight about the difference in my kind of control, his kind and the many reasons why she shouldn't just give in to him (It's not a happy relationship, and should end soon).

I'm actually surprised, as we're 'out' to most all of our vanilla friends, that it doesn't happen more often. I guess we're lucky that none of 'em are the type to bat an eye at strange shenanegans like wot we do :)




hardbodysub -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 11:31:49 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968


quote:

ORIGINAL: pompeii

My vanilla friends don't know ... 


Perhaps if you had a capital P....


I've found that having a big P always makes it easier to get the girl.




pyroaquatic -> RE: When your vanilla friends turn to you... (2/9/2010 12:00:24 PM)

I am not sure if I have friends or not. The internet is the closest thing I have to friends.

I do not see it in terms of vanilla or kinky.... or BDSM. The rules are the same; the nomenclature is not.

:3




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