Chastity (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress



Message


markoliver2282 -> Chastity (2/12/2010 11:26:07 AM)

Hello everyone

i have read a lot about slaves wearing chastity belts for months without relief.  i have to admit that i find it completely hot in my fantasies.  However, in reality i am not sure i could handle it.  Does this happen in real life or is it just part of story writer's fantasies




SolangeRichards -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 11:56:09 AM)

I followed a blog a few years ago by an author investigating chastity. It was a 60 experiment, but I think he cracked around day 45.

The concept was to be daily postings, and this guy was a real chatterbox so there was something to read every day. As time wore on he got increasingly nutty with what he was posting, almost as if he were being driven insane.

He was not in a relationship, but admitted he was a chronic monkey-spanker so there was at least something to give up. He also chose to make it rougher by upping his daily dose of pornography. All in all, not a bad read, but by no means was it an erotic one.

I don't know if you could find that blog via Google, but I'll bet there are plenty of others.....




Tantriqu -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 12:36:16 PM)

If a standard erection-restricting device is meant, no, not in real life, and shouldn't. For sexual health, a man and his prostate should ejaculate or at least be milked once a week: if he's good. As they say, it concentrates their minds wonderfully.




markoliver2282 -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 3:45:54 PM)

i didn't think it happened to often in real life.  Fantasy and reality can be two completely different things.




LadyAngelika -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 4:56:13 PM)

quote:

Fantasy and reality can be two completely different things.


It would be very useful for many people to print that sentence out and paste it on their computer monitor ;-)

- LA




bicindylicks -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 5:30:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

quote:

Fantasy and reality can be two completely different things.


It would be very useful for many people to print that sentence out and paste it on their computer monitor ;-)

- LA


that is true




dreamerdreaming -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 5:42:10 PM)

My best knowledge (and lets be clear, I'm not a doctor- but I play one with my own sweet slaveboy....[;)]) is that a man's prostate should be drained at least a couple of times a week, to keep him healthy. About every few days. 

And then there are issues with the device itself. Is it one that can be comfortably worn long term, and still allow for proper hygiene? Even if you could keep it on and still get properly clean and dry inside it (both you and the device), there will inevitably be issues with chafing, etc. eventually, and its going to be only right to let yourself air out and have a rest from the device once in a while. I'd be worried about chafing, chapping or cracking, fungus, and infection resulting from breaks in the skin or from not being able to keep really clean in there- things like that. If those risks could be mitigated by having it off for a time every day, maybe once or twice a day for proper hygiene such as your shower, and then drying off and maybe moisturizing with a little baby oil or something like that before you put it back on, then it seems to me like it would be a lot more livable. But again I do think that without fairly frequent milking, your health would be at risk anyway. And you've got to get one that's sized properly, and made of a material that won't make you break out...

If you read my journal, I've never actually had a boy in chastity but I used to dream a lot about it- my concept of it is that "long term" means I would take him out to play with frequently and just lock him back away when I'm done. That's besides the time for daily cleaning. And of course I'd milk him at least every few days. So there'd be a lot of attention there, just under my complete control. The idea of long term denial does nothing for me. Long term control is the idea. Control is my main "kink", if you could call it that. My D/s centers around ownership and control.

Those are just my sweet dreams. We never got around to doing it, because my career has me away frequently. So its just not practical.

I would definitely ask your doctor, for some real medical advice if you need it. These are just my opinions, based on my own research, and anecdotal evidence.




lastone -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 7:07:38 PM)

Control is the main key of chastity training. My Mistress uses constant chastity training on me, but i do not wear a device. She tells me when I am allowed to have an orgasm and I obey her. I completely understand that she owns my penis and I am only to pleasure her penis when she gives me permission. We started this a little over a year ago and I only disobeyed twice. But, I was punished severely both times when I disobeyed. I have now arrived at the point that I am completely used to her controlling this. If I'm a good slave I get to pleasure her penis often enough that it is healthy and satisfying.




LadyAngelika -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 7:17:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lastone

Control is the main key of chastity training. My Mistress uses constant chastity training on me, but i do not wear a device. She tells me when I am allowed to have an orgasm and I obey her. I completely understand that she owns my penis and I am only to pleasure her penis when she gives me permission. We started this a little over a year ago and I only disobeyed twice. But, I was punished severely both times when I disobeyed. I have now arrived at the point that I am completely used to her controlling this. If I'm a good slave I get to pleasure her penis often enough that it is healthy and satisfying.



This is my technique as well. My last journal entry on my profile discusses exactly this.

- LA




bdspirit -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 8:00:41 PM)

Well, my wife and I enjoy chastity play and as I type, I've been in for 3.5 weeks with no release (but Valentines day is coming - here's hoping).  OP, the reality is very different from the fantasy but extended times without orgasm are pretty common (by extended I mean from 2 weeks to 6 months or so).  The longest I've gone is about 45 days - for me after about 3 weeks the need/desire even with regular teasing and denial level off and I kind of enjoy the energy and focus the experience provides. 

We use a prostrate massager to "milk" me probably once every 7-10 days when I'm in longer.  I've heard all kinds of stories on what is healthy- not sure what is being posted here is totally accurate - the prostrate can be "exercised" without ejaculation.  Our typical release cycle is about 2-3x / month but there are allot of experienced chastity players that are much more extended (30-60 days plus).  The key is that a couple does not just decide to do this and start with a two month lock up - give 2 hour or 2 day experience a try first.  Over months and years, you tend to get used to the mental and physical changes that happen (from sleep and morning erections to how to modify your workout at the gym so you don't show your CB device to the gym rats).  This is not something you're going to just experience because you read a forum about it and bought a CB-6000.

In terms of devices, that also is a pretty varied subject with different opinions.  I appreciate mistresses that say a slave should not need a device - her word should be enough.  That said, for our relationship dynamic, a device is both a powerful symbol and an erotic extension of the mental and physical experience.  To each his/her own. I've probably got 4-5 different devices from a couple "CB" series to a full Neosteel belt which costs a bunch of money.  For me, the CB-6000 (after you fiddle with it ALLOT) is the best all-purpose for my body and needs.  I travel on airlines and the steel belt for that reason (and comfort, hygeine and working out) isn't a good long-term solution though it is by far the most "secure."  The reality is that with a Dremel saw (or in some cases a pair of cutters) you can free yourself from damn near any device.  It is a symbol and a reminder.  It takes time for your body to adjust and accept the device and there are allot of sites and experienced players dedicated to that process.

That all said, physically reinforced chastity has created an amazing dynamic in my relationship with my wife of 15 years and it has taken me to places (mentally, physically) that I had never been before, regardless of the skill of my lover or the intensity of feelings.  I think I can also say with some certainty that after a slow start, my wife/domme has become a pretty big believer and truly enjoys the power and control she exercises over my body and mind.

Wish you all the best.

Bound. 




GraciousLady -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 8:40:14 PM)

A man never needs to ejaculate for physical health. The body reabsorbs the sperm and fluids. If he constantly thinks about it and does not like to be denied he will be uncomfortable that's why his self control and devotion to his Mistress and her will is important. His mental and emotional health is another issue. For a normal healthy adult orgasams are all a part of normal life. You just have to figure out how long is long enough and how long is to long.




thaprincess -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 10:22:53 PM)

A chastity belt would not work well with my sub and I. I love and I mean LOVE sex, so I need his cock to be available at all times with no obstacles in the way (aside from clothing). With that said, I love controlling my sub's orgasms and when he does and does not touch himself. The mental aspect of it all is such a turn on for me and him. But him wearing a chastity device, I highly doubt that will ever happen. But there are a few blogs I've read that discuss D/s relationships where a Mistress makes her sub/slave wear one. 




thesubmissiveboy -> RE: Chastity (2/12/2010 11:34:16 PM)

I have been in chastity for a month twice now and I'm telling you, it's probably the hardest thing I've ever attempted. I didn't wear a chastity device as couldn't afford one, and so it was down to just pure self discipline and determination to complete it. It was intense to say the least as I have an extremely high sex drive. By the end of the first week I found that everything I looked at aroused me, and that I would be erect more than normal. By the end of the month I actually felt ill from it. But it was a very satisfying experience in the end.




CdnExplorer -> RE: Chastity (2/13/2010 7:20:07 AM)

Keeping clean in a chastity device isn't too hard, at least with the cbX000 series of devices (and those similar to them). It takes a little more work than normal, but there's no good reason for bad hygiene while wearing one. Running water, body wash, some q-tips and baby powder will keep everything clean and likely fresher than most vanilla men.

Comfort is a big issue though, but assuming the fitting is correct this is only an annoyance / lifestyle issue. I've found that I can't wear my cb2000 under jeans. Not only is it extremely uncomfortable after an hour or so, but the device is also quite visible. People might not know what it is, but they'd definitely know I had stuffed something in there. Something hard, with weird angles. You may need to adjust your wardrobe if you're serious about doing this for more than a few days. The other question is whether or not it will get in the way of the things you do. For example going to the gym. I know one guy who had to negotiate a release for part of the summer because he raced dirt bikes. He tried wearing the cb2000 during a race and actually cracked it when coming down from a jump.

There is a similar device out now made of silicone though. It's called the Birdlocked and the best place to get it from in North America seems to be Kept For Her. It isn't as adjustable as the cbX000 devices, but does come in a few different sizes. From what I've heard the thing is so comfortable that you can forget it's even there during the day, assuming you're not too big for the one you bought.

There are definitely people who wear these devices for months or longer, just the same as there are people who like to do flesh hook suspension and other extreme things. I do know a guy (the dirt bike racer) who wore a device for many months with one orgasm at least every two weeks. He could earn more though, and knowing the Domme involved that probably happened almost every week much to her consternation haha. She did seem a bit conflicted about it...the curse of the kink [;)]

I don't like to think of chastity in terms of denial, but in terms of foreplay. Chastity devices seem to be a common kink and I suspect that's how most of them are being used; "short" term foreplay.




Rochsub2009 -> RE: Chastity (2/13/2010 7:36:05 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: bdspirit

OP, the reality is very different from the fantasy but extended times without orgasm are pretty common (by extended I mean from 2 weeks to 6 months or so).  The longest I've gone is about 45 days - for me after about 3 weeks the need/desire even with regular teasing and denial level off and I kind of enjoy the energy and focus the experience provides. 



i have quite a bit of experience with chastity, and i agree with bdspirit on this one.

i'm not a doctor, so i can't give medical advice.  However, i think that those who have never experienced chastity are usually more concerned with it's health effects than those who have done it.

i have been kept in forced chastity for long periods of time.  2 months is the longest that i've ever gone, but i've done 6 week stints in chastity on multiple occasions.

The fantasy of chastity is a lot different than the reality.  In the fantasy, you only think about your Mistress owning your cock and controlling your orgasms (one of my favorite D/s scenes).  However, the reality is a bit more complex.  When you wear a device (i prefer a CB-6000), it can get very uncomfortable at night and make sleeping difficult.  This is particularly true during the first few days in the device.  Your body will naturally get a night-time erection, but the CB-6000 doesn't allow this, so there is constant (uncomfortable) pressure on your penis.  This is what makes sleep difficult.

Over time, the pain wears off, and you should start to sleep comfortably.  However, the next problem is hygiene.  Because the CB-6000 is plastic, it doesn't breath particularly well, so there is sweating that goes on.  Unfortunately, the devide doesn't allow any contact with the penis.  So while it prevents you from masturbating (which is what most Dommes want), it also prevents you from washing effectively.  Some Dommes will allow you scheduled times out of the device for cleaning purposes.  Others won't.

As bdspirit mentioned, after a while, the desire to cum goes away.  Initially, it will be all that you can think of.  Literally.  The only thoughts that your brain will seem to be able to formulate will be about how badly you want to cum.  It can be excruciating (yet incredibly pleasurable....if that makes sense).  But after a while, the desire dies down and you won't even think about orgasm anymore.  You will have a sense of calm and focus.

Personally, i prefer chastity training without a device, because i think it is much more difficult.  After a week of chastity, you will want to sneak and masturbate while your Mistress isn't around.  It will take a lot of will and obedience to stop yourself from masturbating and giving your body the release that it craves.

If you prefer mental bondage, then i definitely recommend the latter approach.  It's easy to SAY that you will obey your Mistress.  But after a week or two without release, you'll probably find yourself sneaking behind your Mistress' back and jerking off like a horny 16 year old.




LadyAngelika -> RE: Chastity (2/13/2010 7:41:32 AM)

quote:


Personally, i prefer chastity training without a device, because i think it is much more difficult.


That's why I prefer it too, but I'm cruel like that.

Also, because as thaprincess said:
quote:

A chastity belt would not work well with my sub and I. I love and I mean LOVE sex, so I need his cock to be available at all times with no obstacles in the way (aside from clothing).


Also, because, well, in all honesty, chastity devices looks absolutely silly and are a big time turn off for me!

- LA




Kaiel -> RE: Chastity (2/13/2010 9:31:40 AM)

The whole aspect of My boy being chaste is a fantasy in My home. I love sex.... So, although I have tried to use that as a tool  (chastity) it simply doesn't work. I feel punished... LOL.  I did keep My previous boy in a chastity device but I spent too much damn time trying to always locate the key to get the damn thing off.... LOL




LadyAngelika -> RE: Chastity (2/13/2010 9:42:40 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaiel

The whole aspect of My boy being chaste is a fantasy in My home. I love sex.... So, although I have tried to use that as a tool  (chastity) it simply doesn't work. I feel punished... LOL.  I did keep My previous boy in a chastity device but I spent too much damn time trying to always locate the key to get the damn thing off.... LOL


I bet you broke a nail too! Sooooo not worth it ;-)

- LA




sumisotico -> RE: Chastity (2/27/2010 12:58:37 PM)

cant wait for my real belt to arrive




luvzdabutt -> RE: Chastity (3/2/2010 8:40:20 PM)

Well, Mistress bought me a CB2000, and we plan on moving in together in a month or so. I will definitely post my experiences if we seriously use the chastity. I feel that Mistress will not leave it on too long at first. Chastity probably works best in long term relationships after some of the initial lust has started to ease up.




Page: [1] 2   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.125