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life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 2:59:39 PM

dinaflower

Posts: 105
Joined: 4/12/2005
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ok heres the deal, every time i think ive found the One, He turns into an ass. why cant i find One who will accept me as the gentle sub that i am?

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:02:49 PM

Wildfleurs

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Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dinaflower

ok heres the deal, every time i think ive found the One, He turns into an ass. why cant i find One who will accept me as the gentle sub that i am?

Maybe its a good idea for you to stop looking at prospective dominants as being the ONE.

C~

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:03:00 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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This might not help but, remember the one thing in common here is you. Maybe you're getting too wrapped up before getting a good judgement readout? Maybe you're putting too much attention on people who are obviously not relevant to your search?

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

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(in reply to dinaflower)

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:04:43 PM

dinaflower

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no thats not it, see the last two of the four ive had, have been so wonderful right after i was collared, then about 4 months down the line they turn into a monster. i dont understand it

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:07:45 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dinaflower
no thats not it, see the last two of the four ive had, have been so wonderful right after i was collared, then about 4 months down the line they turn into a monster. i dont understand it

4 in how long a time period? Not that there's some empirical formulat to use, but that's only 2 out of 4- which is a pretty good record actually.

How long did you wait before becoming collared? Was this short distance real life? Or long distance online?

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:08:53 PM

dinaflower

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real life, we waited 6 months on the first one. and 8 in the last one. this is over the last 2 years

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:12:55 PM

Sensualips

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Hmm, people typically don't just turn into monsters over a few months unless there is a specific cause. (Addiction, mental illness, depression, etc.). Is it possible there were things early on that you chose to overlook? It is natural to want to focus on the dreamy brown eyes and big strong hug -- and ignore the pointy toe claws, scaly underbelly, or breath that reeks of rotting corpses..

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:16:47 PM

dinaflower

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rotting corpses? has this become a problem? lol but seriously, i think im just cursed

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:19:06 PM

wild1cfl

Posts: 567
Joined: 4/19/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

This might not help but, remember the one thing in common here is you. Maybe you're getting too wrapped up before getting a good judgement readout? Maybe you're putting too much attention on people who are obviously not relevant to your search?

I agree here with Lucky Albotross, I want a prospective slave to take the time ot get to know me and my wife before we collar her. We like to know that we all are sharing the same ideals for our relationship before it becomes a committed one. I think you are not seeing the forest for the trees so to speak. You are so caught up in the collaring that you overlook some of the bad traits until you come down from that euphoric feeling of being collared. Take the time to get to know the other person and understand that there will always be things that you will not like about the other person, but the good things outwiegh the bad.
Wild

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:22:31 PM

dinaflower

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i thought at the time that 6 to 8 months was plenty

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:29:17 PM

wild1cfl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dinaflower

i thought at the time that 6 to 8 months was plenty

Sometimes it is enough, sometimes it is not. my wife and I knew each other for 4 months when I proposed to her. The thing is that we both talked openly adn freely with each other and understood each others parameters for a relationship. We were married just over a year after we met. Over the 20 years that we have been married we have found 2 other people that we have shared a wonderful D/s relationshp with as our slaves. We have known several hundred others that in one way or another were not right for us. Some of them we knew were not right within a few months where others have taken as much as a year to discover that the situation was not right. You cannot really put a time limit on it.

Wild

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:30:33 PM

dinaflower

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still doesnt make it any easier when the person turns out to be a jerk

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 3:39:07 PM

sweetpleaser

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Relationships are tricky. There is no way for us to know all about what happened for informed responses. Usually toward the end of a relationship the same arguments will come up. Is there a common argument among all these men? What is their complaint against you? I am not saying you are the cause of them turning into monsters, but it could give us a clue as to what is going on with them.

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It's not the men in my life that count, it's the life in my men.--Mae West

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 4:23:43 PM

IronBear

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Something I lkearned along time ago. when I was looking for a lady .. Some one special and yep I wanted someone younger because all the ladies in my age group were either too set in their ways or were just too damned old in their heads and stone the crows the ones who did attract me and who were attracted to me were committed Christians,, (Yeah that wen't down well when i told them I was a Pagan Priest).. I simply stopped looking. I got on with life, started to manade and body guard a stripper who was my house mate with her significient other. One of our girlfriends invited the three of us for a duel birthdat bash at the pub.. Imet the other b/day girl, figured she hated me and she thought I was taken.. To cut the story short the other b/day girl with the great titts and long wavey red hair was Neets. We got it together andwere engaged a month later and married two years later....... (Why d'you think that officially I'm not looking for a kajira or slave to train as one these days......?

). Seriously sweet try getting on with things and stop brooding about your illusive "One" ~ To make a "ONE" egged (master) omlet y'll need to go through a basket of ones which are off. How big the basket is depends on you.

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 4:37:37 PM

MrDiscipline44

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You're leaving alot of details out of the relationships you had. Why did they break up? All you keep saying is they were jerks, what is it that gave you this impression? This is really looking like a "pity me" thread. Quit the whining already.

From your profile, it seems that you're one of those "slaves" that is really just looking for a boyfriend. Being a slave isn't about having some over glorified boyfriend. It's not about doing everything you want but throw a fit the minute you're hauled to the carpet for something you did or were supposed to do. Now I may be wrong, but this is the impression from your profile.

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 4:45:57 PM

KittenWithaTwist

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Wasn't there a song that went: "That's life, that's life...that's what all the people say....."

That's life. Sometimes it sucks. Perhaps there are some more important things to focus on?

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 4:49:52 PM

mnottertail

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Sinatra did a rendition of that but according to your version, he fucked up the second verse...........

LOL,
Ron

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 4:50:14 PM

dinaflower

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life sux then you die, fuck the world lets all get high

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 4:51:50 PM

NeedToUseYou

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

You're leaving alot of details out of the relationships you had. Why did they break up? All you keep saying is they were jerks, what is it that gave you this impression? This is really looking like a "pity me" thread. Quit the whining already.

From your profile, it seems that you're one of those "slaves" that is really just looking for a boyfriend. Being a slave isn't about having some over glorified boyfriend. It's not about doing everything you want but throw a fit the minute you're hauled to the carpet for something you did or were supposed to do. Now I may be wrong, but this is the impression from your profile.

I got the same impression.

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RE: life is a bummer - 3/28/2006 7:02:35 PM

Shayna

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Dina - you can't change others, you only have control over yourself. My advice is to work on self-love and building a fulfilling life without a partner first. Focus first on your own health and well-being; then you can surrender to a Master from a place of strength and not need/deficit.

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